Iron Maiden
by FigTreeofyourImagination
Summary: More insanity! Waha! In otherwords, just what kind of chaos follows after Shadow decides to get a pet... Ch 14 up, and thus COMPLETED! please R & R!
1. Polly wants a cracker

**DISCLAIMERS: I don't own them. Sonic and all his followers who seem to have nothing better to do with their time other than pester him into being a hero all belong to the Sonic Team and Yuji Naka.**

**Note: This story is, more or less, better understood if 'A Day at the Park' is read first. That way you'll all be exposed to the whacked-out world I live in a much gentler manner. This tale will probably become a little dark as the chapters go… Otherwise, enjoy. Once again, this may not be the greatest choice for Sonic purists. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED… rated for mild language (maybe not for this chapter… but later… in chap. 2 definitely.) and general weirdness and evil ectoplasm ooze.**

* * *

IRON MAIDEN

CHAPTER 1: POLLY WANTS A CRACKER

Another day in Studio City, the entertainment hub of… well, many dimensions. And today, the production of the latest soon-to-be-Sonic-Team creation, 'Sonic Riders,' begins. And needless to say, the blue-furred star, the one and only Sonic the Hedgehog, wasn't happy about it at all.

"Stupid… Idiotic… Inane…" he muttered.

"Now now," said a bundle of red and black fur walking beside him, grinning happily. "It's a beautiful day. You mustn't let the call from the Studio get to you. Isn't that right, shnookums?" he said, twittering to his new pet, an emerald green parrot-hawk, a rare imported animal from the jungles of the Neitherworld.

Sonic continued to stalk away from the pet shop, fuming. "I don't _like_ 'beautiful' days! And would you stop talking stupid to that stupid bird! It's driving me bananas!"

Shadow gasped, hugging the cage. "Don't call my Polly Perkins stupid! She's a smart bird!"

"Squawk!" squawked Polly Perkins.

"'Polly Perkins'?" repeated Sonic. "_That's_ what you called it?" he asked, looking back as he walked. "That's the dumbest name I've ever heard."

"It's not dumb!" pouted Shadow. "How would you like it if I started calling your miserable pets names?"

"I don't have pets," retorted Sonic.

"What about that phantasm that lives in the bathroom mirror?"

"That's not mine, he just lives there. I just haven't bothered to exterminate him yet, since he doesn't bother me."

"Hmph! Figures! You have no sense of responsibility!"

Sonic snorted. "Oh, and you do? Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't it because of your so-called sense of responsibility you lost your first twenty pets?"

"Squawk!" said Polly Perkins, flapping her wings inside her cage.

Shadow was appalled. "Don't say such things in front of Polly Perkins! You'll upset her! See! Look what you've done!" he whined, trying to calm the green feathered bird with cooing noises as it continued to flap its wings with mounting fervour.

"Ha!" laughed the other. "If that bird has even half the brains you hope it has, it'll know that getting away from you is the best way to prolong its life."

"Shush! I'm a good owner! I have learned my lessons and I am willing to have another go at animal care."

"You may be willing, but I can't say the same for miss Polly Perkins!"

"Squawk!"

"Shut it, Sonic! I'm a good owner and you know it!" pouted Shadow.

"The more you say that, the more I worry," snorted the other.

"You couldn't keep a pet alive if your life depended on it!"

"Oh? I'd say that I'm a better keeper than you'd ever be."

"No way! I'm more mature, and-"

"What!" Sonic shouted incredulously. "You know I'm a better caretaker than you! Just look at those free-loading fools that I have to endure day after day. Excluding you, I guess. I hate them with every fibre of my being and yet they're still alive! That in itself is testimony to my superior care-taking abilities."

"That's a load of hooey! They're alive because they know how to look after themselves…" He thought for a moment. "And they know how and when to avoid you."

"That's true. And that means I'm a good teacher. They're learning well," he snickered.

"You're full of it," pouted Shadow.

"Maybe. But it's sure as hell better than what you're full of."

Shadow scowled at his fraternal twin, trying to bore a hole into his brother's brain with the force of his gaze. Polly Perkins had settled down, looking around with bright beady eyes. "Squawk!" she crowed.

"Tell that bird to shut up," snarled Sonic.

"Squawk!" said Polly Perkins. "Polly wants a cracker!"

"I said tell that feathered nuisance to shut it!" repeated Sonic, a murderous gleam in his eyes.

Shadow wasn't paying attention to his brother's discomfort. Instead, he was glowing with pride. "Oh! She talked!" The black hedgehog was positively glowing. "Say it again, Polly! Say it again for your master!"

"Squawk! Polly wants a cracker!" replied Polly Perkins.

"Look, Sonic! She-"

"Polly wants a cracker!"

The two were silent for a few seconds. Then, "hey, bro. Your green disease-carrier just cut you off."

"She's just doing what I told h-"

"Polly wants a cracker! Squawk!" screeched the bird.

Shadow took a deep breath. Sonic was grinning from ear to ear. "Ha!" he laughed, pointing.

"She's just getting exci-"

"Polly wants a cracker!"

Shadow looked at his new pet reproachfully. "Now Polly Perkins, that's no way t-"

"Polly wants a cracker! Squawk!"

Sonic was laughing like a banshee, clutching at his stomach.

Shadow was loosing patience quickly. "I don't have any-"

"POLLY WANTS A CRACKER!" squawked the bird loudly.

Shadow held the cage away from him, a look of utter disgust and confusion plastered on his face.

Sonic was inches from rolling on the pavement. "Well," he choked between laughs, "now we know why that dumb bird was selling for so cheap! Wahahahaha!" He finally fell bodily to the floor, kicking his feet in the air. Shadow looked absolutely torn. He stared at the disrespectful bird with watery eyes, wondering where he went wrong. Polly Perkins stared back, tilting her head from one side to the other, green crest lifting slightly from the back of her head.

Shadow stammered, knowing better but unable to stop himself. "I, I don-"

"POLLY WANTS A CRACKER!" shrieked the caged animal.

Sonic was still laughing like a village idiot. "That's so sad! You can't even get a single word-"

"Polly wants a cracker!"

His laughing instantly stopped. "Wha? That thing had better not've just-"

"Polly wants a cracker!" screamed Polly Perkins, peering about innocently.

Shadow snorted into his hand, trying, unsuccessfully, to hide his amusement at his brother's expense.

Sonic was livid. "You sickly little-"

"Squawk! Polly wants a cracker!" interrupted Polly.

Sonic looked as though he wanted to kill something. "Shadow, give that-"

"Cracker! Squawk! Polly wants!"

"-goddamn bird-"

"Polly wants a cracker!" insisted the feathered pet.

"-a friggin'-"

"Polly wants a-"

"CRACKER!" Sonic's chest was heaving and his azure hair was standing on all ends.

Shadow tried to answer his sibling through charades. Shaking his head vigorously, he pretended to nibble on an invisible cracker, staring intently at his brother. Sonic was giving the black and red haired giant mammal an awkward stare, wordlessly telling him that he looked like a total dork. The other sighed and prepared himself. "I don't-"

"Polly wants a cracker!" said the bird.

"-have any-"

"Polly wants a-"

"CRACKERS!" he shrieked.

* * *

The two un-brotherly brothers walked in silence, knowing all too well by this point that conversation was a bad idea. Polly Perkins was also silent, swaying in her cage contently, peering about the new world in general interest or possible disinterest. At long last they reached their abode, or more correctly, Sonic's abode which he was begrudgingly sharing with three other sentient beings and now one pet. With a rattle of keys, the blue mammal let himself, and his brother after a little thought, in. They were instantly greeted by an ear-piercing squeal. "WEEEEEEEEEE! Sonic's home!" shrieked Tails the two-tailed fox, leaping through the air to plaster himself to his caretaker like super-glue.

Sonic said nothing, though it was clear from the tortured look on his face that he was not at all happy having a freak of nature stuck to his person. He grabbed a-hold of the golden-furred animal with both hands and promptly un-stuck him from his chest. Plopping him to the ground, he nudged Tails away with his foot. Tails looked hurt. He looked up at the bird cage and started to snivel loudly. "I -sniff- I thought you went to go get GROCERIES!" he bawled. Sonic pinned the young fox with an icy stare, ears flat against his head. Tails instantly clammed-up; there was a few seconds of silence before he started screaming again. "WAAAA! I want Juicy Joe's Gummy Gubbers!" The blue hedgehog was starting to twitch dangerously. Shadow took his brother's arm carefully and lead him out of the kitchen and into the conjoining living room.

Knuckles was there, sitting quietly, reading the daily newspaper, Studio Times. However, he was also sitting in Sonic's favourite armchair. Turning purple, the Sega star opened his mouth to tell the echidna off, but with a tiny twitter from Polly Perkins, thought better of it. Instead, he marched up to the oblivious creature and snatched the paper from his hands. "Hey!" exclaimed the redhead over Tails' wailing. Sonic rolled the paper tightly in his hands into a tube and began to beat the unfortunate being over the head with it soundly. "What the-ow! Ow! Ow ow ow!" Knuckles retreated from the chair and Sonic took his place, hurling the remainder of the Times at the antagonised animal as he ran for cover.

The red echidna stopped his retreat beside Shadow, giving Sonic an incredulous look. "What was that for!" he yelled over the cries of a very upset two-tailed freak. The blue-furred animal didn't reply, and his brother just gave the echidna a forlorn look. Peeved by the lack of enlightenment, Knuckles didn't let up. "Hello! What is the matter with you two? That chair is communal!" he shrieked. Sonic shot him a cold stare in response though one half-open eye. "Does your thick skull house the definition of the word 'share' at all!" he continued. Shadow inched away from the redhead with this new comment, not needing the fiery glare of death his sibling was giving the angry echidna to encourage him. The two 'friends' stared each other down for several silent seconds. Finally, Knuckles unwisely bent forward and hissed, "you don't scare me."

There was a loud bang, and a massive tremor shook the very foundations of the whole neighbourhood block. The occupants of this collection of homes gave the event no thought, most having gotten used to the forces that were more often than not behind such occurrences.

Back at the home, red and black dust was slowly settling to the ground. All was quiet now, even Tails had brought his screams to a close. Sonic sat fuming in his chair, the top of his head smoking slightly. Shadow poked his head cautiously overtop the counter that separated the kitchen from the living room, surveying the damage. Knuckles, however, was no where to be seen, a hole in the wall punched behind where he had stood only a split second before. The same hole was repeated in several walls after it, until finally towards the back of the house, a struggling, red-furred torso could be seen jutting out from the thick slab of wood and insulation, though the head was nowhere to be seen. Stifled mutterings signalled that the giant animal's cranium was still intact. The unfortunate being tried unsuccessfully to dislodge himself from the wall, kicking out his legs and pounding at the drywall in hopes of freedom.

Polly Perkins was unfazed by the whole event, twittering softly to herself, gazing at the last remnants of the supernatural haze as it dissipated into the air. Sonic was huffing heavily now. "No-one… No-one takes my armchair…"

"Squawk!" said Polly. "Polly wants a cracker!"

Sonic glared at the bird. "Get… that… bird… a… cracker… ," he hissed through clenched teeth, digging his gloved fingers into the cushioned arm-rests.

Shadow was already rummaging through the cupboards in search of the crumbly treats. Polly twittered excitedly. Finding a package of soup crackers, the black and red hedgehog took several from the plastic wrap and crushed them with his hands, dumping the resulting crumbs into the bird's cage. With a happy squawk, Polly Perkins devoured the offerings.

At the back of the house, Knuckles pulled himself free from the wall, dredging chips of drywall and fluffs of pink insulation with him. Steadying himself he made his way back to the living room. Tails stared at the eating bird, as if he had never seen anything like it before. "What's that?" he asked Shadow.

"What's what?" inquired the hedgehog.

"That," he said, pointing to Polly.

"That's a bird, Tails," he replied. "You do know what a bird is, don't you?"

Tails shrugged. "Sonic calls them 'pests'."

"Sonic calls everything a 'pest', Tails, amongst other unpleasant things, but that doesn't mean that that is what it's actually called."

Tails looked confused. Maybe that was why his teacher never allowed him to recite the names of the animals at the zoo. "Okay," he said, scratching his head.

Knuckles had finally reached the kitchen, taking a seat at the table. He reached for a cup of coffee and promptly drowned himself in it.

Shadow shook his head and stood up with the bird cage in his hand. "Now, where to keep you…" he mused.

Sonic piped up from the living room. "You didn't think about that before you bought it?" he yelled out incredulously.

"No need to shout," retorted the other. "I had a general idea. I just need to finalise it now."

Sonic made a disgusted snort from his seat. "As always, you're completely unprepared for the consequences of your decisions. Just don't put it anywhere near my room."

"Oh? And why not?"

Sonic sat up. "You did _not_ think I'd let you, did you?"

"Actually, I thought you'd humour me for one night while I purchase the rest of Polly's cage-wares.

Sonic stalked out of the living room, looking rather upset. "You didn't think to get all that while _we were at the store?_" he said dangerously.

Shadow remained unfazed in the face of his brother's oncoming fury, something Knuckles never got the hang of, and he thus slowly took cover underneath the table.

"They didn't have any nice stands," said Shadow simply.

His brother was livid. "That bird does not set one _feather_ in my room, understand?"

"Oh, but my room's a horrid mess! I don't want to set a bad example to my dearest Polly Perkins on her first day here."

"Squawk!" squawked Polly.

"Your room is clean," stressed Sonic, glaring.

"No. It is not."

"Yes it is. I saw it this morning. It. Is. Clean."

"That's how it was this _morning_, brother-" he stopped himself. "Why were you in my room?" he asked suddenly.

"I wanted my book back."

"I didn't take any of your books."

"Yes you did. My 'Compendium of Cursed Artefacts of The Seventh Circle'. You have it somewhere. And I want it back."

"You still have that old thing?"

"Give. It. Back."

"I already told you _I don't have it_," he said again, leaning into his brother's face, accenting every consonant.

"You do have it. I saw you take it into your room Wednesday night."

"I don't know why you're accusing me of such a thing," he replied snobbishly. "I have no liking for artefacts, and you know it."

"Then why did you take my book?"

"I didn't. I think you're hallucinating again. Have you been taking your medications?" He eyed him suspiciously.

Sonic sighed. "I don't _take_ meds, and you know it."

"You should be. With the condition you're constantly in, I would expect no less."

Sonic fought to keep his temper in check. "_I_ am in perfect health," he hissed.

"Humph. But still, Polly Perkins will be bunking with you for tonight, dear sibling."

"No. NO. That bird stays out!"

"Oh, come on. How bad could it be?"

"I will _fry_ that bird if it so much as comes within a _foot_ of my door!"

Polly Perkins ruffled her feathers. "Squawk!"

"I have nowhere else to put her! Show a little sympathy!" cried Shadow.

"Squawk!"

"See? Look! Even Polly is asking you nicely."

"Get. Bent," said Sonic.

Shadow huffed in exasperation. "Don't be so uncivil!"

"Being uncivil is one of my many job-descriptions, dipstick," Sonic quipped.

"Oh, for heaven's-" he stopped himself, heading upstairs.

"Wha? Where are you going!" Sonic yelled up after him.

"You are going to have a lesson in courtesy!" he shouted back, making his way to his brother's room.

"Oh, no you don't!" He ran up the stairs after him. "Stop right there!"

"Don't you touch her!"

"Get that goddamned bird out of my room!"

Tails and Knuckles sat quietly in the kitchen, waiting for the hammer to fall. Knuckles continued to cower under the table. Tails sat on the floor in the open, staring through the floor in the general direction of the blue hog's room. The shouting continued.

"I said GET OUT!" screamed Sonic.

"Don't you yell at me!" scolded Shadow.

"I yell at you all the time! Why the sudden dissention?"

"Because you're scaring Polly!"

"I don't care about that horrid bird!"

"Ah. Here seems to be a good spot."

"I said no! Get out!"

"The cage is on the floor! It's not like she'll get in your way!"

"Yes she will! And she'll stink up the place with her reek!"

"She does not reek!"

"That's because she hasn't decided to _relieve_ herself yet! Out!"

"Your room smells awful anyway!"

"It does not!"

"It does so! Look! You still have ectoplasm seeping through the ceiling!"

"As if yours is so much cleaner!"

"It is. You said so yourself."

"Aag!"

Knuckles inched out from under the table, hoping the argument was over. He was, unfortunately, quite wrong. The brothers continued to tear at each other.

"Just go and clean up your room! Then that dumb bird can stay with you!"

"Don't call my Polly Perkins dumb!"

"I'll call it whatever I like!"

The bickering went on. Tails laid back on the tiled floor. Convinced now that he was more or less safe from destruction on a personal level, Knuckles got up from the floor and peered at the stove clock. It was four in the afternoon.

It was seven at night when the shouting finally stopped. And even then, it was only a momentary cease-fire. When the fighting would erupt again was anybody's guess, though it seemed as though Shadow, against all odds, managed to have Polly stay in his brother's room for one night. As a result, Sonic spent the better part of the evening glaring at him; a glare so powerful, any flies that flew in the unhappy hedgehog's line of sight dropped from the air, dead. Shadow was unaffected by his brother's killer glare. Knuckles tried very hard to avoid it as he delivered everyone their dinner plates. Tails was oblivious like he usually was. Polly was upstairs, squawking to herself. Sonic left the table momentarily, heading upstairs. Within seconds he returned, with an even more sour look on his face. He placed himself with a plop before his steaming bowl of oatmeal (Knuckles couldn't cook for his life) and shot his brother another evil glare. "I now know you are full of crock. Totally and utterly."

"Oh? And how so, my dearest sibling?" asked Shadow, never looking up from his bowl.

"You said you couldn't put Polly in your room because it was dirty," he began.

"Mm-hm. And?"

"Your room is virtually spotless. I just checked. So take that bird out of my room," he ordered.

"No. I think it will do you some good to have a roommate for a night. Besides, my room _is_ filthy. I don't know what rose-coloured glasses you've been wearing-" Knuckles snorted up a spoon of porridge, gagging. "-But it's a pigsty."

Sonic's bowl of oatmeal was beginning to bubble and steam in front of him. "There was an overcoat on the floor."

"And?"

"That was it. Just a coat. It's practically clean."

"No."

"Yes. It. Is," stressed the other, clearly only just controlling his temper as his food jumped about in his bowl.

"Not by my standards. There's more to the filth in my room than the coat," he added quickly, holding up a finger to silence his twin. "You wouldn't notice them. They plague me. And if I'm going to have my miss Polly Perkins stay with me then I must clean them out."

"Remove that bird," he said slowly.

"No. She's your guest for tonight."

"Re-MOVE it," he insisted.

"En. Oh."

"MOVE the BIRD."

"Read my lips: nnnoooooo."

Knuckles looked back and forth between the two in puzzlement before finally voicing his confusion. "Why don't you just move it yourself, Sonic? It's not like your arms are broken." Sonic shot him a cold glare.

Shadow answered for him. "I put a repellent curse on the cage. He can't touch it. Nor can he try to destroy it."

"Oh. Wow. I didn't know you could do that."

Shadow chuckled. "I still know a few incantations he either doesn't know, or can't use."

Sonic went red in the face, jabbing at his food murderously.

And so the day ended on a relatively peaceful note. Each of the four video gaming stars retired to their beds happily (most of them anyway), oblivious to the chaos that would ensue the coming morning.

* * *

**TBC!**


	2. A bad case of the sniffles

**DISCLAIMERS: Sonic and all his groupies belong to Sonic Team and Yuji Naka... yada yada...**

**BUT: Tory, Philips, Core, the emotionless voice on the other end of the phone are MINE. And so is the I.S.I.D. So there.**

* * *

CHAPTER 2: A BAD CASE OF THE SNIFFLES

The house was in an uproar (meaning the brothers were either fighting again, or were soon going to be). Shadow stormed out of his room in a rage, making his way to that of his brother's, yelling at the top of his lungs. "Get up, you sadist!" he shrieked, banging on the door with a fist. Knuckles poked his head out of the hallway washroom, in the middle of brushing his teeth. Tails literally fell out of his room with a loud thud, still in his baby-blue pyjamas, clutching his bed-time-buddy, Mr. Funny. Shadow didn't give the others even a 'hello', but instead just continued to hammer on his brother's door in fury. He held his bed-sheets in his left hand, they sported a floral pattern and were riddled with tears and holes, drenched in something foul. Whatever it was was all over Shadow as well, coating him from the shoulders down, matting his fur in clumps. "I said open up!"

No answer came.

"Dammit, Sonic! If you don't open this door this instant I'll blow it off it's hinges!"

Knuckles continued to watch, the brush standing stationary in his mouth. Tails inch-wormed his way into the bathroom.

"Sonic!" he screamed again.

There was a slight rustling from inside and the door finally opened a crack. "Mmmgg. Wha' d' ye wan'?" came the stuffy reply from behind the door.

"What is this?" Shadow interrogated angrily, unfolding his shredded bed-sheets for examination, pinkish-purple goo flying everywhere with the force of the movement. "I know you did it. So speak up."

"I don' know wha' yer talkin' abou'," was the groggy reply.

"Don't you give me any of that! You did this to get back at me, didn't you?"

"I din' do nothin'," Sonic sniffed from the other side of the door, still refusing to open it any more than a hair.

"Come out from behind that door!" ordered Shadow.

"No."

"Oh?"

"I don' fee' well."

"Really? Did your plan backfire and blow up in your face again?" he stung.

"No. I din' do nothin', alri'? Go away." He started to close the door.

Shadow stopped him, jamming his foot between the door and the doorway. "Oh, no you don't!" he said. "You're hiding something, Sonic. I can tell."

Sonic tried again to shut the door. Shadow didn't let up. "Le' me a'one."

Knuckles was still watching, foamy toothpaste migrating down the sides of his face.

Shadow pushed the on the door roughly, causing the sentry behind it to fall back. The door swung open, revealing behind it a very dishevelled and very ill hedgehog. Shadow cringed. "Ooh. You look awful."

Sonic sneezed loudly, lights erupted from his nose like golden ashes, floating in the air around his head before disappearing. He groaned.

Remembering why he had greeted his brother 'good morning' in the first place, Shadow reinstated his argument. "I'm still waiting for an explanation, sibling." He tapped his foot irritably on the carpeted floor. "Well?"

Sonic gave his brother a half-hearted glare. "I _din'_ do anythin' you foo'!" he sniffled. "Do you 'ones'ly thin' I cou' do anythin' 'en I'm li'e this?" he semi-shouted, wiping his nose with his hand. "I can' e'en wa'k strai't, daggnabbit!"

Shadow gave in. "Alright. I'll let you off for now. But I'm going to get to the bottom of this," he said, grabbing his brother's arm with a slime-coated hand. "Let's see if you're ready to spill the beans once you've had a little tea." He dragged his groggy brother downstairs into the kitchen, bed-sheets still in hand.

Knuckles watched them go. Looking back into Sonic's room once, he returned his attention to the task at hand. Resuming his tooth-brushing, he peered at his reflection in the bathroom mirror. Brushing heavily he stared at his mirrored face. Tails had levied himself on the closed seat of the toilet, looking for his own toothbrush. The echidna looked at the fox irritably as he dumped his porcelain-faced clown doll half-into the sink. Reverting his attention back to the mirror, he stared into the face of the most hideous thing he had ever seen. There, staring right back at him, was a six-eyed, pink phantasm. With a guttural laugh the thing plunged its face forward with a roar, causing the echidna's red dreadlocks to fly backwards with the force of the otherworldly wind. Toothbrush falling out of his mouth he screamed and ran out of the bathroom and dove down the stairs. Tails paid the apparition to heed, and commenced brushing his teeth.

"AAAAHHH! AAAAAHHH! AAAHH!" Knuckles shrieked as he fell bodily down the last flight of stairs. The two hedgehogs stared at him. "Th-thing!" he gasped, pointing towards the upstairs bathroom. "Six eyes! Pink! Hor-horrible!" He crawled to the circular kitchen table, shaking like a wet Chihuahua.

"It seems Knuckles has met that bathroom phantasm of yours," stated Shadow simply, still coated in goo.

"That thing's yours!" he asked incredulously, staring at the stuffed-up blue hedgehog as he pulled himself from the ground.

"I's no' mine!" he defended from within his blanket, taking another swig of his steaming herbal drink. "Ifs it goin' to cause thi' mu'h tru'ble then I'll ge' rid o' it!" he sniffed.

"You mean if its going to cause this much trouble for you," put in his brother.

"Shu' ub!"

"Well, whatever, as long as its gone," said the echidna, pouring himself a shaky bowl of cereal. Taking a few deep breaths he added milk and sat himself down with the temperamental twins. Tails eventually joined them as well, completely unfazed by the supernatural encounter that had taken pace only moments before.

"So," began Shadow. "Today we all start filming and what-not for our latest project."

"Ug," groaned Sonic loudly.

"Joy. When do we leave?" asked Knuckles.

"I'd say we should all leave in about forty minutes," replied the red and black furred giant rodent. Tails had made himself breakfast and joined the rest of the cartoon heroes at the table.

"I'b no' goin'," stated the ill hedgehog, clutching his blanket closer over his shoulders.

Shadow glared at him. "You're not that sick. You're coming with us."

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" questioned the echidna. "He looks pretty bad."

"Oh, he's fine," he replied dismissively. "If he really was sick, he'd be sneezing roaches out of his nose."

Sonic sneezed forcefully. A snake shot from his nostrils and landed with a splash in the middle of Knuckle's Cheerios. The redhead shrieked like a little four-year-old girl and fell off his chair.

Shadow scooped the snake out of the cereal and examined it critically. "Hm." He got up and opened the window over the sink. "That's a rather dispiriting sign," he said as he dumped the reptile outside to slither about the yard. "It seems as though you really are sick."

"You think!" shouted Knuckles, shaking badly now. This was _not_ his morning. First pink ghosts, and now nose-snakes. How could this day possibly get any worse?

Shadow stood by his goo-encoated chair. "I'm going to clean myself up," he said. "Once I get all this foul gunk off of me we'll leave."

"I'b no' goin'!" Sonic shouted after him as he made his way up to the shower.

"I know that," he shouted back. "I'll think of a sitter while I clean up."

"I don' nee' a 'abysi'er!"

"What about your chair?" Knuckles called up.

"Just leave it," came the reply. "I'll get it after."

"I don' nee' a 'abysi'er," pouted Sonic to himself. He sneezed again, resulting in a myriad of multi-coloured lights to erupt out of nowhere and begin to circle his head as a large black roach landed in his tea.

Tails didn't seem to notice anything out of the ordinary. Knuckles, on the other hand, was sickened and had already completely lost his appetite. "You should get that looked at," he said cautiously, moving out of sneezing range.

"Bi'e me."

Shadow was in much higher spirits than his fellow Sega stars when he returned from the shower; though needless to say he was only slightly surprised at the sight that awaited him once he got back to the kitchen. Phantasmagorical bubbles had coated the floor, and more of the floating lights had taken up residence in the airspace, a few more snakes were weaving through the mess on the floor while a mass of them had congealed on the top of the table with a few giant roaches shoved beneath them. Knuckles and Tails had taken refuge on the counter, the echidna trying desperately to keep the two-tailed fox from touching the oddities flowing, flying, skittering, or slithering by. Sonic looked terrible, hardly able to keep his eyes open as he continued to sip at his tea, hardly noticing the roaches and red centipedes scurrying out from the mug as he did so.

"Ah. It seems as though the problem as escalated somewhat," observed Shadow.

Knuckles was at the end of his rope. "How can you possibly be so calm!" he shrieked, batting Tails' hands away from a rather menacing bubble floating past.

"Well," he stated. "When you've been with my brother for as long as I have, and experienced similar things, nothing really surprises you anymore."

Knuckles blinked. "I guess… But how do we get out now? There's no way I'm touching this stuff! It could be contagious!"

"I highly doubt that. There's nothing really to worry about…" he thought for a moment. "Unless it's the next plague. Then I suppose we should."

"What!"

"You can get out through the window, Knuckles."

"Wha? Oh!" Without any hesitation the echidna dove out the open sink window, taking Tails with him.

Sonic sat in his chair. Peering with bleary, bloodshot eyes, through heavy, discoloured eyelids. "Bye," he said.

"You're not staying here alone," said the other.

"Feh."

Shadow stalked over to the phone. Brushing away bubbles and lights he picked up the receiver and dialled a few digits. He waited patiently as the phone rang on the other end, his brother still sneezing at random intervals, sending more even larger snakes and insects shooting out of his nose. The other line was answered at last. "This is the I. S. I. D., how may we help you?" greeted the voice on the other end.

"Tha' be'er no' be who I thin' it is!" shouted Sonic weakly.

Shadow ignored his brother. "Yes, hello, I'd like to speak with the Director, please."

"Han' tha' ub!"

"Hello?" answered a new voice.

"Good morning, Director. I trust I find you in good spirits?" responded Shadow conversationally.

"I sai' han' tha' ub!" screamed Sonic.

"Shush!" scolded Shadow. "Can't you see I'm on the phone?"

"Good morning, Shadow," said Core over the phone. "What can I help you with?"

"I need a, ah… sitter for my dear brother," said Shadow teasingly, watching Sonic go red in the face.

"Oh?" questioned the Director. "Why is that?"

"It seems he's come down with something and the rest of us have to go to work."

"The call din' as' for you, you ninny!" shouted Sonic.

"I'm going to fill in for you! So shush!"

Hearing the argument from the other side, Core placed a hand on his forehead in exasperation. "Shadow, what has he come down with?" he said, trying to not shout to make himself heard.

"Ah, that's part of the problem, Director, as we have no idea. Though he's showing similar symptoms to those from the last time he spread the plague," said the black hedgehog cheerily. "So unless we do something, I guess, we may have a second break-out of the Scather's Blight."

"Shu' ub!"

"I fail to see the humour in this, Shadow," stressed Core.

"Sorry, Director. I just can't help but laugh at my pitiful brother's misery," grinned Shadow. "So I was hoping you could send someone to look after him while me and the others are gone for the day. I don't trust him while he's in these states of un-health. He could run-off somewhere and start a panic, even if I threatened him to not do so."

Core listened with shortening patience. There was nothing he hated more than conversing with Shadow while his brother was suffering in some way or another; the hedgehog would get cocky and a little too easy with his words. "I can… feel for you, Shadow," he said carefully. "But I don't think it wise to be sending my men straight into a cloud of disease, you'll understand."

"Of course! Though I can say with confidence that your men won't be harmed at all."

"How so?"

"Whatever my loathsome sibling has caught will be rendered harmless for as long as he remains inside the house. If he leaves, then you should worry."

"I see," the Director said calmly, trying to dismiss the flippant way the being was speaking to him. "What do you need, then? I want to know all the details before sending anyone down there."

"Most certainly, just one minute."

Core held the phone as he heard Shadow yell out to Knuckles and Tails to start towards the Studio without him. A thought caught him. "Shadow," he started as soon as the other picked the phone back up. "Did knuckles or Tails come in contact with whatever it is Sonic has?"

"Not to worry, Director! They won't spread a thing!"

"I'm not convinced, Shadow," he said tersely. The thing's cheeriness about the whole situation was beginning to grate on his nerves. Then again, it was their job to be so morbidly happy about such things.

"Like I said, as long as he stays inside, my brother and his sneezes pose no threat to anyone-you sit down!" he shouted suddenly. "That's what I thought, you sit there! Sorry, Director, my sibling is making an ass of himself."

Core heard a long string of sniffled curses rising out of the background. He sighed. "Shadow, if you don't mind me being so frank, but I must ask you to stop harassing your brother. I'd feel better knowing that he won't be taking his anger out on the men I send to 'sit' him." There was silence on the other end. "So then," he continued. "You're telling me that this sickness is inert for as long as he remains indoors? No-one will contract it?"

"For heaven's sake, no. Your men will be fine!"

"I'll take your word for it. But, should anything happen, Shadow, I'm holding both you and your brother responsible for-"

"Yes, yes," he cut him short. "We perfectly know the drill, don't we, sibling?" More obscenities from the background.

"Fine. I'll send Tory and Philips. They'll keep in contact with one of the doctors over here should anything come up."

"Wonderful! Just be sure to tell them to keep Sonic inside."

"That would be the last thing I'd forget, Shadow. They'll be there in fifteen minutes." He hung up. With another sigh he contacted the two unfortunate Institutionary staff who would be spending the better part of their Sunday with the ill-tempered mammal.

Shadow was beaming at his brother triumphantly.

"Feh. Grin while you can, 'adow," sneered Sonic through a haze of pink and yellow lights. "I'll 'e sure to coat your room in snot 'or when you come 'ack."

"Do that and I'll wring you over our indoor plumbing and leave you there." He perked up, remembering his old argument. "By the way, _dear _sibling," he stressed the words dangerously, narrowing his gaze. "Care to explain to me why you painted my bed-sheets in pink ooze?"

"I din' you 'oron!" he shouted as well as he could.

Upstairs, Polly Perkins sat in her cage, alone in her corner. "Squawk!" she said to herself.

Shadow eyed his brother coldly.

"I 'ave enough 'roblems with the ec'o'lasm in my room. Why woul' I go though the 'ain of 'essin' up yours?" snorted Sonic tiredly.

Shadow let up. He'd have to get to the bottom of this later. It was highly unbelievable, but Sonic was probably telling the truth; of all the things he was, the blue-blur wasn't a liar.

Sonic snorted loudly, and sneezed in spite of himself, sending more icky critters flying towards the now-closed sink window.

Shadow watched emotionlessly, waiting for the sitters to arrive so that he could finally leave. Though to say the least he wasn't looking forward to explaining to the game director why Sonic couldn't attend today's round of torture.

After a few more minutes of semi-silence and bubbles the Caretaker team arrived in their infamous Jeep. The vehicle made a small 'kyu' noise as the two Institutionaries unloaded themselves from their seats. Not at all happy with the job they had been stiffed with, Tory and Philips made their way as slowly as they dared to the door of the Sonic Brother's abode.

"Oh, good they're here!" Shadow raced to the door to let the two men in. Upon catching sight of exactly who was coming up the stairs he grinned wickedly at his brother. "Ooh. Sonic, your _favourite_ chum is here…"

"Meh?" Sonic sniffed.

Tory entered along with Philips.

"Aug," groaned Sonic. "It's the Nanny Squad." He sniffed loudly, barely holding up his cranium from the snake-littered table.

The silver-haired youth shot the hedgehog an icy glare. "I'm not in the mood for any of your antics, Sonic," said Tory flatly.

"The 'eelin' is mutual, 'uman," quipped the sickly mammal.

"Oy now, do ye 'ave tae get off on te wrong foot every time ye meet?" cut in Philips as he kicked off his shoes.

"Ah. Excuse me, my good redhead," broke in Shadow, addressing Philips. "But why do you have a twelve-gauge strapped on your back?"

"I never go anywhere withoot my bullits!" replied Philips heartily. "Ye never knoo when ye might runn intae somethin' nasty!"

Shadow took the point. "Yes, well, just don't shoot the vases, alright? They're antiques." And with that he left, though not without giving his unhappy brother a satisfied smirk.

The three sized each other down, mainly Tory against the fiery glare of one ill animal. The glare-off lasted for several seconds until it was rudely interrupted by one of Sonic's sneezes, in which he hurled a small nest of garters across the room to rest at the feet of his guests.

Tory and his partner nearly jumped in surprise, trying to get away from the snakes. Settling down, Tory sighed in resignation. "It's going to be a _long_ day."

* * *

**tbc! Stay tuned!**


	3. Wicked ingredients and second skins

**DISCLAIMERS: Sonic and his slaves are copyrighted to the Sonic Team and Yuji Naka... Zidane and his foolish followers belong to Squaresoft... Arukard and Alexander Anderson are copyrighted to Khota Hirano and Darkhorse publishing, the Saiyuki quartet belong to Kazuya Minekura.**

**BUT: Eebon is mine, and so is all the other staff, and the three ladies that walk out of the washroom.**

* * *

CHAPTER 3: WICKED INGREDIENTS AND SECOND SKINS

Yes. It was going to be a long day. Knuckles already knew that. He knew it the moment he woke up that morning… and came face-to-face with a pink poltergeist… and then had a snake land in his cereal… And know he had to endure a more-than-usually horrid day under the supervision of Eebon, their game director.

Eebon was livid. "What do you mean he can't come in today!" he shouted from his director's chair.

Shadow refused to be intimidated by the bipedal-feline's temper. "He's sick. I'm here to fill in for him."

Eebon gave Shadow a wicked glare. "Do you think our clients are stupid? They'll be able to tell the difference between you and your slack-off excuse for a brother!"

Knuckles caught Shadow twitch with the remark.

"I was certain that it would've been in everyone's best interest if Sonic stayed home," said the black and red hedgehog slowly. Ooh, he'd be sure to bring him in the next time he was firing projectile pests from his nostrils. See how the staff handled _that_. "He is very ill."

"Humph," snorted Eebon. "I don't care. You have an hour to drag his sorry behind to the Studio before filming begins." With that he got up and stalked away.

Shadow watched him leave, glaring daggers at his back as he disappeared into the mass of black-furred feline staff.

Knuckles was speechless. He looked back and forth between where the director had been and the angry hedgehog, trying to form words.

Shadow sighed. "Well, we'll have to improvise now, won't we?" he said, not releasing his gaze on his now-unseen target.

Tails ran around in circles about the two of them. Knuckles was confused. "Wh-wha-what?" he stammered.

Shadow turned around to face him. "We're going to bring Sonic like the director asked."

"But I thought you said that he should stay at home…"

"Of course, Knuckles. We're not going to _bring_ him here," he said. "We're going to play a little game of _substitution_."

Knuckles thought about this, a very confused look on his face. Tails was squealing like a pig, still running loops around the others. The red echidna spoke up. "So… what you mean is…"

"You'll see," replied Shadow. He grinned and walked away. "Help me find a cauldron, would you Knuckles?" he called back.

"What do you need a cauldron for?" Knuckles followed after him, Tails still running around his person.

The nervous echidna watched as the brother of his 'landlord' rifled through the Studio's vast collection of set props. "Are you sure about this?" he quivered.

Shadow ignored him, tossing costumes and foam chunks this way and that in his search. Tails made 'woo'-ing noises each time a foam slab took to the air, giving the impression that his current idol was a broken police siren.

"Ah!" Shadow spoke up as he pulled out what he had worked so hard, and made such a big mess, to find. He pushed the massive black pot out of the storage room, causing the set to reverberate with the sound of metal scraping on concrete. Knuckles followed him uncertainly, trying to ignore the awkward gazes the staff were giving them. Tails trailed behind, spinning himself in circles as he followed the echidna, arms spread out. Shadow pushed the oversized piece of cook-ware into a secluded spot in the corner of the set, which turned out to be the women's bathroom. The dark hedgehog shamelessly ploughed into the restroom, somehow manipulating the reality continuum to get the cauldron inside. Knuckles was appalled. He stood before the door, gaping. There were mutterings from inside, and three feminine beings left the vicinity.

Shadow poked his head out from behind the pinkish swinging door. "You can come in, you know. Those lovely ladies have just agreed to let us borrow their restroom for a while." The echidna just gaped, unfocussed eyes staring in different directions. Tails dove in, oblivious to what taboo territory he was stepping into. Shadow continued to hold the door open. "Well? Are you going to help me preserve our pathetic occupations or not?"

"Gaaahaa…" bubbled Knuckles.

"I'll take that as a yes." He grabbed the other's arm and hauled him inside.

"Nnniiiiaaaa!" screamed the echidna, flailing like a fish out of water. "Nnneeeeoooooo!" he cried, covering his eyes as he was forced into the women's washroom. "No way!" he shouted. "I'm not partaking in this if we're doing it here!" He tried to navigate his way out with his eyes shut, and only being about three feet tall, smacked face-first into a sink in seconds.

"Don't act stupid," scolded Shadow. "What's the matter with you?"

Knuckles refused to open his eyes. "I refuse to gaze upon the female relief room!" He pushed himself up from the floor, head colliding with the underside of the same sink.

"What? Oh!" Realisation dawned on Shadow. "You're afraid of the ladies' room!" he concluded.

"I'm not afraid of it!" defended Knuckles, slowly getting to his feet, keeping a sharp feel-out for any more obstacles that would spell pain for his face. "I just have morals, that's all!" he stung.

"Oh, please," scoffed Shadow, sounding a lot like his brother. "It's no different than the men's room. Look, Tails is perfectly fine." Tails was running in and out of each and every stall, flushing the toilets in succession.

"That's because he's not old enough to realise he's not supposed to be in here." He tried again to find the door.

"Oh, no. I doubt that. He goes to school, so I'm sure he knows the difference. Don't you Tails?" he called out.

"Wibble-doogle-dee!" screeched the fox, still making his way down the line of stalls.

"Of course, my brother would heartily disagree with me. He'd say he's stupid. Ah… I can hear him now… cursing away…" Shadow lost himself in whatever thoughts were going through his head. Knuckles tried again to find the exit, this time bashing bodily into the wall. "Oh, stop that!" said the hedgehog angrily, grabbing a-hold of the echidna and whipping him around to face him. "Now open those eyes! If you don't, then so help me I will hex your boxer drawer with a Boggart!"

"No way!" shot Knuckles. "I intend to preserve my dignity!"

"Tails!" called Shadow, letting go of Knuckles. "Get over here!"

"Wee?" replied Tails, waddling over.

"Help me with this."

"N'kay." He promptly kicked the echidna in the shin.

"Aaahhggg!" The echidna cursed loudly, hopping on one foot. His eyes shot open. "What was that for, you-" He stopped himself, looking about with wide eyes. "Waaaaa!" he screamed, hands on his head. "PINK!"

Shadow rolled his eyes. "It's a women's room, what did you expect? Green?"

"AAAAAGGGG! My eyes!" he screamed. "My eyes have been soiled!"

"Oh for Gods' sake shut up!" huffed the hedgehog.

Knuckles continued to shriek, sharing the same expression as the famed painting 'The Scream'. Growing more angry by the second, Shadow slapped the echidna soundly across the face. The redhead instantly clammed up, rubbing his swelling cheek in disbelief.

"That's better," said Shadow. "Now, if you're finished, I would like to go about the business of keeping our jobs."

"O-okay," replied the echidna sheepishly. Tails had gone back to flushing the toilets. "How-how are we going to do that?"

"We _were_ going to make a substitute for Sonic," explained the black and red mammal. "But since we have wasted so much time opening your eyes to a new frontier, we won't have time to build a whole puppet. We'll have to settle for a skin instead."

Knuckles considered this. "A… _skin_…?" he questioned, a squeamish expression forming on his face.

"_Yes_," stressed the other. "Think of 'Men in Black', or 'Invasion of the Body Snatchers'."

"I didn't see that last movie," he said stupidly, his mind still wrapping around the fact that Shadow had just smacked him.

"Well that doesn't matter." He waved his hand and a large, leathery tome appeared and settled in his grasp. Leafing through the pages he continued, "I just need you to help me collect the ingredients for this plot."

Tails continued to wreck havoc in the background. Having finished his fun with the toilets, he began to make a toilet-papier-mâché snowman, singing the 'Frosty the Snowman' carol.

"Hmm," Shadow mused as he gazed over the procedure of the brew he had chosen. "Mmmhmm. Ahh." He made his way over to the cauldron. With a snap of his fingers the pot was filled halfway with water. He looked up finally. "Knuckles," he said. The echidna straightened. "I need you to go and fetch me the ingredients now."

"Um… I don't know about this…" he started.

"Do you want to keep this sorry occupation? I have close to no doubt that Eebon will fire the lot of us if we don't pull this off. And I'm also sure that Sonic will throw both you and Tails out onto the curb if that happens."

"What about you?"

"What about me?" he interrogated angrily.

Knuckles paled slightly; somehow, it didn't seem as though Sonic was at home anymore. "I'll get the stuff," he said at last with some difficulty.

"Good," he peered over the top of the book. "I need-don't mess this up-a bottle of liquidised Brumm roots. The spine of a Doppelganger. The heart of a Kappa. Trans-water, not Fresh-water. Three strands of vampire hair. The skull of a rat. The tail of a half-simian. A flask of Icinian acid. A small bag of bat guano. Assorted. And… the hand of a zombie." He looked up, finished with his list.

Knuckles ran the list through his head. "How am I going to get my hands on all that?" he asked incredulously.

"You can probably get it all here," he stated flatly. "Get going. And take Tails with you," he added. "I'm going to stay here and stir the brew. I need you back here in a half-hour. We've already wasted fifteen minutes." He summoned out of nowhere several flasks of oils and a staff. The oils poured themselves into the cauldron as Shadow began to stir the mix with the gnarled shaft of wood. "Don't make me tell you twice," he said over his shoulder.

Knuckles dashed to the door, grabbing the two-tailed fox as he went.

Once outside the restroom he didn't stop running, his brain scrambling. Tails stumbled along behind, being half-dragged half-pulled by the hand.

The red echidna finally slowed down. "Okay…" he said to himself softly. "Liquid Brumm roots… Doppelganger spine… Vampire hair…" he trailed off. How in blazes was he going to go about this? Shadow was probably right about the fact that he could find all the stuff here in the Studio, but where to look… As perverse as it sounded, some of the stuff sounded more or less like some sort of cooking specialty. Knuckles snapped his fingers, there was only one place and one person he knew of that would carry any of that as cooking ingredients. He rushed off again, Tails tailing after him.

Weaving through the masses, Knuckles continued to mutter the list in its entirety over and over, adamant on getting everything. Everything was a blur as he ran, and everything abruptly stopped as he collided at top speed into the legs of a giant. He fell back into semi-unconsciousness. There were voices all around him.

"Oh my! Is he alright?" asked one.

"Whoa! Did you see how fast he was going? That was hilarious!" jeered another.

"Aw. Poor thing," cooed yet another.

"Is it dead?" questioned one to the side.

"Let's poke it with a stick and see!" suggested the second voice loudly.

Knuckles felt a probing in his side. He sat bolt-upright. "TAIL OF A HALF-SIMIAN!" he shouted. The entire ring of spectators took a collective step back, save one, who had the biggest mop of red hair the echidna had ever seen.

"Hey now, there's no reason to be making fun of my looks!" pouted the owner of the fourth voice; a blonde wearing blue pants and vest with a white under shirt and gloves. And behind him, waving slightly, was a tail.

"Zidane! Don't you recognise him?" shot the keeper of the first voice; a brunette of the same age in yellow jumpers and a white shirt with fluffy sleeves and red gloves.

"Yeah, Z. Has your sight gone stupid, too?" jeered the holder of the second; a short little fellow in a blue vest with wide sleeves and a striped pair of pants, his face was completely hidden by the insanely tall hat he wore, his eyes glowing from underneath it.

"I'm not stupid, stupid!" stung Zidane.

"Ooh, good comeback, you pansy," shot the other.

Knuckles struggled to clear his head. Looking about he could finally put names to the faces around him. Tails, however, beat him to it. "Fantasy people!" he squealed.

"Hello, Tails!" greeted a silver-haired, near carbon-copy of Zidane from atop the shoulders of the massive redhead that Knuckles had collided with.

"_Final_ Fantasy," muttered Zidane.

"How do you know him, Kuja?" questioned a rat-like warrior dressed in a bright red rain coat.

"I found him dancing in the rain once, singing 'New York New York'. I was walking by and he said hello."

"Are you sure you didn't break the ice first?" stung the other tailed boy.

The character called Kuja looked hurt. "You take that back!" he whined, banging his fists on the top of his carrier's head; who wasn't in the least bit fazed. "How can you say such things?"

"Because you're gay," retorted Zidane.

"I'm bi and you know it! Besides, I only go for adults, you sicko!"

The argument raged to new heights between the seven actors, except, once again, the pale-skinned giant; who remained silent throughout the entire ordeal.

Tails was staring at Zidane's behind. "Tail…" he said to himself. Without warning, he latched himself onto the boy's golden tail with his teeth like a rabid dog.

Zidane screamed like a thing possessed, spinning around, trying to grab the offending fox and remove him from his tail.

"Tails! Let go!" shouted Knuckles, completely at a loss at what to do.

"Vivi! Help me!" shrieked the boy.

"Ha! And miss out on this? Not on your life!" replied the child in the hat.

Knuckles had managed to grab onto Tails' legs, trying to pull him off the other actor. Most of the members of the other acting team had taken their own hold on the flailing Zidane, pulling in the opposite direction. A tug-of-war ensued, the boy and the fox being pulled back and forth between the echidna and the other team. The redheaded giant watched in silence with Kuja perched on his shoulders, not moving a muscle.

"Get that thing off of me!" cried Zidane. "Where's Quina! She could pull me out of this!"

"You're welcome for the help, Zidane," spat the rat warrior, still pulling. "But Quina isn't here."

Knuckles tried to dislodge Tails from the posterior of his victim, the young fox was proving to have an incredible bite.

Zidane looked up at the unmoving giant. "Amarant! Get your butt in gear and help me out!" he shouted indignantly.

Amarant didn't move. Kuja just grinned from his high seat.

"Come on, you git! Do something!"

Still no response.

"You damn tubby monk!" he shrieked.

The calling of the last name proved to be a very bad idea. The giant moved with blinding speed, grabbing hold of the tailed-boy's body, and yanked him into the air. There was a small popping snap and Zidane's tail tore cleanly in two, the other half still caught between Tails' tiny teeth.

"_Nobody calls me tubby_," hissed the massive redhead as Zidane landed with a loud 'thud'.

Knuckles fell backwards as the opposite pull was released, catching Tails in his arms. He made off quickly, not wanting to stay for the aftermath once Zidane got back on his feet. He ran towards the kitchens, glancing at a clock, he found that they still had twenty minutes to retrieve the rest of the ingredients; and since it seemed that they had just obtained one of the items, which was currently dangling from Tails' mouth, they now had only eight more to go.

Rushing along he took a wrong turn, diving into another filming room. Stopping to catch his breath he leaned heavily against the door. Tails looked about them and piped up. "Dead people!" he said happily. Knuckles went stiff, looking up he saw hordes of shambling zombies slowly making their way towards them, moaning and groaning like zombies do. They had stumbled upon a Resident Evil set.

Knuckles instantly started screaming like a possessed opera singer, trying to open the door they had just entered. But, like in all cliché horror movies, the door had somehow become jammed. The echidna dropped Tails and began to hammer on the door repeatedly with both fists, still screaming. "Ooh, living dead thingies…" said Tails in awe.

"LET ME OUT!" shrieked Knuckles, rattling the door-knob crazily. The crowd of living dead inched their way closer to the two giant animals, moaning and groaning still. Knowing by now that they were as good as zombie mulch, Knuckles took a classic 'I'm going to die' stance, pressing his back against the door, screeching like an over-paid blonde actress. Tails sat on the floor, leaning on the door, counting his fingers. The zombies reached out for their targets. Knuckles squeezed his eyes shut, thoughts of death looping through his head. He shuddered; Shadow was going to be pissed. And he'd probably haunt him in the afterlife in some way or another once he found out. Suddenly, a flare of will came to life in the echidna's breast. Hell, he'd weathered worse than this; he had survived one horrible evening inside a house that tried to eat him, and he had fought off an army of the living dead armed with only a grease-stained pan. "I WON'T GO DOWN WITHOUT A FIGHT!" he shouted. Tails looked up at him as if he had gone mad.

With a hearty battle cry the red echidna threw himself into the throng of undead, hands balled into tight fists. "YAAAAAAA!" he hollered. Bits and pieces of zombie flew everywhere as he threw punches left and right, the sheer force of his attacks tearing the rotting corpses apart. Tails got up and fiddled with the door. Much to his lack of surprise, he opened it. The echidna had been pulling the door in the wrong direction. The door swung outward.

"I opened the door!" he called out, still holding Zidane's tail tightly in his hand.

Knuckles stopped in his assault, stunned. The zombies glared at him as well as they could through sightless eyes, growling fiercely. Knuckles grinned stupidly and dashed for freedom, grabbing Tails and slamming the door behind him forcefully. Gasping he noticed something was clinging to his skull. Reaching up he dislodged a wriggling hand of cold decaying flesh. "Two down," he gasped. "Seven to go."

Pushing himself from the door he took Tails by the hand and continued on his way, taking absolute care to pick the correct path. Gripping the struggling hand tightly the echidna shambled down the hallways towards the kitchens. Navigating through the meal area Tails spotted something to his right, screaming he dashed towards it, taking the redhead with him. "FIIIIIIIISSSSHHHHH!" he shrieked, wriggling free of Knuckles' grasp, grabbing a butter-knife from one of the nearby lunch tables and brandishing it like a machete. He leapt at his intended target, a tall, red-haired man in a blue vest and a white muscle shirt topped off with a pair of poofy fishing pants.

"Tails! Stop!" cried Knuckles. The fox sailed towards his victim like a heat-seeking missile. The man turned and caught Tails in the air with a whip of his arm, holding out the struggling youth from his person. Tails squirmed in the man's grasp, trying feebly to stab him in the chest with his weapon of choice, the blunt knife bouncing harmlessly off the red-eyed man's clothes. The fellow looked up at Knuckles as he made his way to the echidna.

"Is this yours?" he asked. Tails continued to jab at him.

"Ah, y-yes," he said with uncertainty. He took a-hold of the nutty fox from the man's hand and promptly imprisoned him under his arm. "I'm so sorry about that. I don't know what got into him."

"FISH!" screamed Tails.

"Shush, Tails!"

"FISH!"

The man stared at the two in curiosity. "Fish, hmm?" The echidna noticed the man wore a necklace of tiny skulls about his neck. Tiny, rodent skulls.

"FISH!"

"Tails, stop that!"

"FISH!"

"Oi, Kappa! There you are!" shouted someone from the corner of the lunch area.

"FISH!"

The red-eyed man looked about. Knuckles was still staring at his necklace, thinking… Wait a minute… Did he say 'Kappa'?

"Sanzo! Goku! Over here!" called out the man.

"FISH!"

"Shh! Tails!" hissed the echidna.

A bouncy, golden-eyed youth wearing a metal coronet ran over to stand by the redhead, followed by a blonde fellow with purple eyes dressed in the most explosive array of tie-dye clothing Knuckles had ever seen. "Ha!" said the boy, who also had a tail, he noted. "You tried to hide from us but we found you!"

The tall man rolled his eyes. "Goku, for the last time, I left to go to the washroom."

"A likely story!" accused the youth.

"FISH!" screamed Tails. Knuckles clamped a hand over his mouth as the two newcomers pinned them with a curious stare.

"Well you took your sweet time, Gojyo," snorted the blonde. "You're going to miss the pancakes."

Gojyo made a face. "Gee. It seems as though you two are going to miss them too if you don't haul your behinds back to our table."

Goku stiffened at this, dashing away a second later. "Nice escape tactic," commented Sanzo, watching him go with a satisfied smirk. He whistled. "Ooh," he said. "He hit someone."

"Figures," huffed the redhead. He turned to Knuckles and Tails. "You still here?"

The echidna gawped for a second. Tails was still trying to reach the man with his pathetic knife from Knuckles' arms. "Um. Are-are those rat skulls you're wearing?" he asked shakily. He somehow got the idea that this man was quite dangerous.

"Wearing? Oh!" he brought the necklace off his throat. "You mean this?"

"Yes," replied the echidna with a little more confidence.

"Yeah," put in the blonde. "Gojyo can hunt rats as if it was his saving grace." The other glared at him, bringing up his hand as if to smack him. Sanzo brought his arms up over his head in defence. "In a good way!" he added hastily.

"Yes, they're rat skulls," confirmed the angry amphibian, not taking his glare off the tie-dyed actor. "Why do you ask?"

Knuckles fumbled with his words. "Aahh… I was wondering… you see… Would you sell one, by chance?" he stammered.

Gojyo gave the giant echidna an awkward glance. "Yeah, sure. I don't see why not." He began to unstring one of the tiny skulls carefully with his sharpened nails.

Tails had wriggled his mouth free of Knuckles' grasp. "FISHY KAPPA HEART!" he shrieked. Knuckles tried to silence the fox, hoping the deal wouldn't be soured with the cry. Tails threw the blunt dairy-knife at the busy Kappa, the piece of cutlery ricocheting off his leg and spinning off into the crowd.

The fish-man stopped his work and pinned the fox with an icy stare, reverting his gaze to the shaking echidna momentarily. "I'll give you this for free if you get that thing away from me," he said coldly.

"Deal!" agreed Knuckles eagerly. Putting the zombie hand on Tails' head he put out his hand as the man gave him the rat skull. With no time to waste he dashed off, Tails struggling in his grasp.

At long last, and ten minutes to spare, they reached the kitchens. Panting, he set Tails down to stand beside him. "Don't do that again," he scolded.

"N'kay," he replied, the zombie hand still clutching at his head.

Standing on his tip-toes, Knuckles rang the service bell on the counter, praying that someone would answer, and answer _now_. He rang again. He was rewarded with a shout from within the kitchen. "Hold horses! I coming!" In seconds a white, bloated face came to peer over the counter, tongue hanging out shamelessly. "What you want?" the thing questioned.

Knuckles stared at the thing stupidly, not saying a word. Apparently the usual cook wasn't in today.

"What you want?" repeated the thing, gazing at him critically through beady white eyes. "What you stare at? You act like you never see Qu before!"

"Uh. No, I haven't," he said at last. "Um. Sorry. We need a few things. Ingredients," he stated flatly, still staring.

"Say what want! Quina go get for you!" the thing said happily.

"Um. Okay. We need a bottle of…" he racked his brain for the list. "A bottle of liquidised Brumm roots, a flask of Icinian acid, a Doppelganger spine, a Trans… water Kappa heart, and a small bag of assorted bat droppings," he recited. He hoped the cook didn't think he was totally cracked.

Quina nodded. "Okay! Wait here! I go get!" With that it waddled away.

Knuckles sighed in relief. Alright. Now that just left… three hairs from a vampire. He swallowed hard. He thought carefully, there were hordes of vampires in the Studio, but only some of them were approachable. Most kept to themselves with the warning the Institute gave them concerning coffins and necks and pieces of wood. The friendlier vampires were free to wander the halls of the Studio as they wished, but they were hard to locate in a crowd this big, especially during brunch. Thinking of all the possible places such a vampire could be, the echidna quickly became dispirited. The combinations were just too great and the favourable outcomes just too small. Waiting for the cook he began to tap his fingers against the counter, trying to watch the cook as well as he could from his un-lofty position. Tails was walking around like a crab on the floor, the zombie hand still tightly clutching his cranium, and the blonde actor's tail still hanging out of his mouth.

Wonder of wonders, Knuckles' sorry lot of luck paid off again, as two new figures advanced towards the kitchen order counter.

"Ach, ye need tae get oot more," said one, an green-eyed, Irish priest character in a grey trench coat.

"If I had the freedom to, I would, but that woman… Ug! I can't stand her!" complained his companion, a black-haired, very tall fellow who also wore a trench coat, but red with a matching hat with a brim that nearly spanned the width of his shoulders.

They came to stand at the counter, passing idle banter. Knuckles looked up and thanked his lucky stars; maybe he could still pull this insane shopping-list off after all. He greeted the two actors. "Hi, Anderson. Hi Arukard."

The two instantly reverted their gaze downwards. "Helloo, Knuckles! How aere ye?" greeted Anderson.

"Yes! How is everything?" chimed in Arukard, adjusting his orange-lensed shades.

"Oh, same old. General chaos. Destruction. No death, though," replied the echidna. "Though Sonic is sick today, so we've been getting hell from Eebon."

"Hmm. Well, that most surely isn't very encouraging. Not by any standards," commented the red-clad man.

"Hey, Ark. Can I see your hat?" asked Knuckles quickly. Handing the hat to him, Arukard went back to whatever conversation he had started with Anderson. Knuckles turned the hat over. Arukard was a vampire, and a vegetarian; and with any luck, a few of his loose hairs would be stuck in the weave of his hat. The echidna grinned as he found what he wanted. Playing it safe, he grabbed as many as he could before the cook finally returned. Giving the hat back to the vampire, he took the bag of ingredients from the cook.

"There you go, sir," said Quina. "One bottle of roots, flask of acid, spine of Doppelganger, heart of fish-man, and bag of bat dung."

"Thanks," said Knuckles and promptly dashed off after leaving some currency behind. Tails followed after him, skipping along. With but a minute to spare the duo made it back to the restroom, where Shadow was busy stirring the now-noxious cauldron. The black pot was smoking and steaming like an angry volcano, greenish-black ooze bubbling and hissing without the aid of a fire. The dark hedgehog was stirring the brew slowly, looking back, he caught sight of the two errand-boys.

"Ah, good. About time you came back," he said, taking the ingredients from his fellow cartoon stars. He looked over the items. "Good, good. You have it all. I'm impressed." He turned back to the cauldron. Knuckles made his way towards the smoking pot, covering his mouth with his gloves to ward-off the stink. Tails went back to his toilet snowman, though he was very disappointed to find that it had melted from the fumes.

Shadow had begun to chant in a foreboding voice, stirring with one hand and taking a-hold of the ingredients in the other. Taking the zombie hand he held it up high above his head and let it drop. The hand vanished, not even making a ripple on the liquid's surface. He continued to stir slowly, sprinkling the assorted bat dung, then crushing the rat skull and adding it in the same manner. He took a firmer hold on the wooden staff as the brew became thicker, bubbling less frequently. Shadow threw in the vampire hairs next, followed by the entire flask of acid. There was a coughing 'fwoof' as the liquid roots were poured in, then the bottle. The sickly fluid was as thick as molasses now, and the hedgehog continued to stir with greater and greater difficulty. Next came the heart, Shadow held it over the pot, and with a tweak in his voice he crushed it in his hand, spreading the drippings about the cauldron before letting the whole thing fall into the liquid. Knuckles peered at the clock through the purple haze that clung to the ceiling; they only had a few more minutes left before Eebon sent them to the gallows. Shadow was still chanting. Reaching for the Doppelganger spine, he switched the direction of his stir, turning counter clockwise. He brought the spine up, the massive trailing of bone nearly as long as he was tall, still covered in meat and muscle. The echidna swore he'd never eat a rare steak again as his companion lowered the spine slowly into the broth. The immediate brew around the bone began to bubble and glow red as it descended deeper into the cauldron, hissing madly. Shadow let go of the spine to stir, letting it lower itself of its own accord. Knuckles watched, transfixed, as the sickly support disappeared into the brew. Shadow was still stirring. He snapped his fingers and a small, crooked flask flashed into his open hand. Inside of it were four short blue hairs. Shadow removed the cork with his teeth, spitting it away. He then dumped the hairs into the cauldron, throwing away the flask. He began to stir with renewed forced chanting louder and louder as he went. The contents of the oversized pot started to glow with interchanging colours, the hovering clouds at the ceiling twisting and churning. Knuckles took several steps back, hoping to avoid any chance of getting hit by lightning.

Shadow's chanting got deeper, much like that of a monk, holding a single syllable as he pulled the staff out of the brew. What was hanging on the end made Knuckles gag. It was an empty skin. _Sonic's skin_. Knuckles was horrified. Shadow was grinning evilly. Tails was still staring at his melted toilet snowman.

The limp bag of flesh was still dripping with dark brew, steaming fiercely as it cooled. "Well well," said Shadow, holding the skin before him. "That turned out quite well, wouldn't you say?" he asked, turning to the stricken echidna. Knuckles didn't reply. The skin had stopped steaming. Shadow brought it towards him, testing its make.

Knuckles was looking over the horrid leftovers of the process. "Uh… Shadow… what about… all the… stuff…?" he said, hand still covering his mouth. "The guys at the Institution probably won't be too happy to find this…" Shadow waved his hand and all evidence of their fun disappeared. "So…" he continued as the other pulled the flesh from the staff. "What are we going to do with-AUG!" he cut himself off as Shadow pulled the skin open and, kicking off his shoes, stepped into the feet. "What the- That's disgusting! What are you doing?" he exclaimed.

Shadow didn't halt his new game of dress-up. "I'm going about preserving our jobs," he said as he slipped on the arms. The seams brought themselves together like a living mass, encasing the black and red hedgehog snugly in its wake. He finally put the face over his own, bring up the spines to encase those he had. With a curious swallowing noise the skin completely overtook Shadow's form. With a stretch he turned around. Knuckles went white as he stared into the face of a flawless copy of Sonic.

* * *

**tbc! What's going on at home? Stay tuned to find out!**

**-Confused? What is the Neitherworld? What the heck is going on? Check out my main page for explanations! More shall be added as I deem necessary or by request.**


	4. Why the bird?

**DISCLAIMERS: Sonic and his lowly subordinates belong to the Sonic Team and Yuki Naka.**

**BUT: Tory and Philips and the Bogeyman are mine.**

**I apologise for the shortness of this chapter! There's a special something at the end for all you folks who are still reading my insane dish of nonsense (Thank you!). Thanks for all the reviews and the support (keep 'em coming, they're the life-blood of this series! And pasta! Lots of it.)! And a really big 'thank you' to -skittles the sugarfairy-, who has encouraged my train of idiocy to run at full capacity since day one (and also told me that another word for 'unidentical' was 'fraternal'.)! Woo! The third chapter has been updated slightly now that I've finally cornered the remaining mistakes and anomalies thus far ('lunch' has been changed to 'brunch' on all accounts in 3 for reasons that will become clear in 5... just so you all know.). I apologise again, for the incredibly cliche bull I pulled in 3 concerning Kuja... but I couldn't help it.**

**Now read! Whahaha!**

CHAPTER 4: WHY THE BIRD?

_These are the days I hate my job_, thought Tory vehemently. Sonic hadn't moved from his seat since Shadow had left, sneezing and sniffling as he sat. Sonic was actually sick. Tory had never seen anything like it before, Sonic being sick, that is. It was also something he would rather have never seen. Philips was distracting himself with the brothers' vast collection of antique vases, each one undoubtedly real and probably cursed in some way. A soft squawking sounded from upstairs. Sonic made a hideous face when he heard it. "Aug… Tha' stupi' bird…" he hacked.

"You own a bird?" asked Tory.

"No. I's 'adow's," sniffled the hedgehog. "He for'ot to fee' it." He rested his head on the snake-laden table painfully. "Go ge' it for me," he gurgled.

"Wha'?" questioned Philips from the living room.

"Why don't you just get up and get it yourself?" snapped Tory. "We're not your servants."

"I can't ge' it myself," snorted Sonic. "'adow cursed the cage. I can't 'ouch it. Go ge' it so I can fee' it."

Tory made a face. "I'll go," volunteered Philips. The redhead headed upstairs and came back down hurriedly with the metal cage. Returning to the kitchen he looked around uncertainly for a place to put the bird. The table was still covered in snakes and the roaches had taken over the counters along with the aid of the bubbles.

Sonic, seeing, though blearily, Philip's problem, made a noise and pointed at the left counter. The invading elements instantly burst into green flames, disintegrating from the counter to leave it bare. The redhead stood and stared for a few seconds before setting the cage on the now-clear counter. Exhausted, the hedgehog let his head drop to the table, causing the mass of snakes to hiss loudly as they tried to worm out from under the animal's skull.

"Ye look awful," said Philips.

Sonic gurgled from the table. He suddenly sat up, hauling himself from the kitchen table sluggishly, nearly falling over. He turned to face the two Caretakers from within his blanket. "The cra'ers are in the cu'oard un'er the sink. I'm goin' ubstairs to loo' fo' somethin'." With that he shambled away.

Tory and Philips tried to kick away the floor-clinging bubbles and insects to free the area in front of the cupboards under the sink. As they rummaged for the crackers there was a loud clanging 'bang' outside as a massive black pot fell from the sky and pelted into the street, leaving a large dent in the asphalt and spilling a noxious brew onto the surrounding road. Giving the event no thought, the two Institutionaries went about feeding Polly.

Sonic trudged up the stairs to the second level of his mansion-like home. Navigating about stiffly he made his way to his room. Wandering about the confines of his bedroom he squinted at his vast collection of books, or what should have been a vast collection of books. The blue hedgehog blinked several times, unsure of what he was seeing. Indeed, many of his books were missing. "Wha' th' hell?" he gurgled. "They were all 'ere this mornin'."

Polly was squawking happily at her late meal. Tory looked about, making a face when he caught sight of Shadow's ooze-drenched bed-sheets draped over a goo-encased chair. "What in blazes is this?" he said, peering at the items with a squeamish expression. Something more weird than usual was going on in the Sonic Brothers' home.

Back upstairs Sonic shuffled down the hallway to his brother's room, a very sour look plastered on his face. Reaching the doorway he fell flat on his face, his feet tangled in his blanket. Looking up he caught sight of his missing books under Shadow's bed. Growling he pulled himself forward, with many nasty thoughts considering what he would do to his thieving sibling once he got home worming about his brain. He stopped suddenly, noticing something move amongst the mass of books. There was a foreboding hissing noise and a hand of sorts grasped the ancient tomes and dragged them down into the shadows on the floor with a sucking sound. Sonic twisted in his sheets and crawled out of his fraternal twin's bedroom as quickly as his germ-ridden limbs would allow. The hand reappeared and reached out for the retreating mammal, a low groan emitting from the unseen depths beneath the bed. The hand grabbed Sonic's bed-sheets, which were still wrapped tightly in a knot about his legs. As the appendage yanked the hedgehog back into the room, he grasped the doorframe with a vice grip. He looked back to see his assailant; but found only a hand attached to an arm vanishing into the shadows. The limb was covered in pinkish sinews and muscle with badly discoloured yellowed bone, devoid of any skin. Its blood vessels bulged as it tried to wrench the ill actor from his anchor.

Kicking and struggling, Sonic tried to free his legs from the blanket that had only moments ago been a comfort instead of a restraining bind. His aching fingers threatening to give way, he began to shout at the top of his lungs. "HELP ME!" he shrieked. The offending hand pulled harder on the sheet.

Tory and Philips wrenched their attention away from Polly Perkins at the call.

"HELP ME, DAMMIT!"

The two men shot upstairs at break-neck speed. Getting at the top of the stairs they stared at the hedgehog clinging at the doorframe questioningly, not seeing the aggressive appendage from their vantage point. "What are you doing?" asked Tory angrily.

"HOLDING ON FOR DEAR LIFE! GET OVER HERE AND HELP ME!" screamed Sonic. A fierce growl sounded from behind him, and with another yank the hand tore him from the doorway.

The men dove from where they stood to grab a-hold of the distressed creature's arms. From this new point of vision they could see the skinless limb. The hedgehog was still trying to kick off the blanket, worming in the air from the taller humans' hold. "GET THAT BLANKET OFF ME!" he shouted. Tory took over Philips' hold on Sonic's left arm as the redhead cautiously advanced to undo the knot that had formed about the sorry creature's ankles. Cursing slightly at having left his weapon downstairs, he worked quickly. The massive hand made an angry noise as the blanket came undone and pulled it away beneath the bed. The hedgehog flew into Tory's arms as the opposite pull vanished, knocking the man off his feet as a result. He quickly, though not un-gently, shoved the anthropomorphic being off his chest, jumping back onto his feet. "What the hell was that!" he interrogated.

"How should I know? It's my fool of a brother's room!" retorted Sonic, his sinuses miraculously cleared.

"Move that bed!" ordered Tory, coming up to aid Philips. They took a careful hold of the bed, avoiding the goo that had been spread over it at some point between yesterday evening and that morning. Sonic got shakily to his feet as the bed was hauled to one side, revealing an ugly spot that had sat directly under the middle of Shadow's bed. It looked almost like a tiny crater, hardly the size of a peanut M&M, with streaks of what resembled soot star-bursting from the puny bump on the fuzzy carpet. "What is that?" Tory questioned quietly, kneeling for a better look.

Sonic stalked out of the room. "Humph. I'll have Shadow's hide for this," he said with disgust. "First he blames me for his dirty sheets and now his bogeyman is stealing my books! He's plotting against me! I'll-" he sneezed violently, sending multi-coloured, bug-eyed, legless reptiles rocketing out of his nose and down the hallway. Philips and Tory continued to study the blast mark on the floor. With a loud scraping noise the bed moved itself back of its own accord, nearly mowing the humans over as they rolled backwards in surprise. Getting back to their feet they tried to remove the bed again. The piece of furniture refused to budge, not even shivering against the force being exerted against it. Giving each other a wary look they left, closing the door firmly behind them in hopes of shutting in whatever had taken up residence under the goo-encrusted bed.

Downstairs, Sonic had rooted himself to his armchair and was muttering to himself, only half-awake.

Polly Perkins was twittering to herself, masses of bubbles and insects slowly advancing in on her position. Considering this to be a bad sign, the Institutionaries relocated the bird from the counter to the much less-crowded living-room. Catching them from under a heavy eyelid, Sonic snarled savagely. "Ge' tha' bird out of 'ere," he sniffed, his sinuses once again under attack with the fading of fear-driven adrenaline.

Tory glared at him. "We're not leaving the bird in there," he stated. Sonic slugged out of his chair like some ancient mound of sentient sludge, totally off balance. Tory knew that his fever was probably what was making the bag of fluff so much more demandingly irritable and arrogant than usual. "Sit down," he ordered. The blue mammal, who was now covered in bruise-like blotches, continued his advance, gripping whatever he could reach to remain standing. "Sonic…" he said slowly, glaring daggers at him as he came.

The sickly hedgehog paused in his trek, huffing out an oncoming sneeze. After a few breaths he seemed to calm down. A nasty gurgling sounded in his stomach and he let loose a vicious sneeze, falling backwards from the force if it. Glowing green ooze shot from his nose and splattered all over poor Polly's cage and Polly herself. She squawked madly with the attack on her person, flapping her wings in panic.

Some of the goo got on Tory's coat as well. Instantly the effected spot began to bubble and sprout hair, the weave bunching and contorting this way and that. The coat smoking dangerously from the unnatural activity, Tory tore it off, making sure the substance didn't touch his white shirt. He tossed the fabric to the ground, whereupon it shuddered and pulled itself into a festering ball to unravel seconds later to reveal a hideous little brown-haired creature with blue skin and bulging yellow eyes. The thing chortled maniacally and dashed off. Polly was shrieking from inside her cage. The metal was steaming where the goo had landed, twisting and warping the metal bars, turning them black. Tory and Philips backed away from the cage as it began to rattle and shake in place, Polly vanishing behind a thick veil of smoke and steam. Sonic laid unconscious on the carpeted floor, oblivious to the chaos going on about him.

With a deafening bang and a 'fwoof!' the ornate cage blew apart, metal shrapnel flying everywhere and embedding themselves into the walls and décor. As the smoke and sparks cleared away, what stood in the place of Polly left the two men speechless. Perched atop the coffee table was a mutated version of Polly Perkins, only now it was humanoid and about three feet tall. It peered about with sharp, ring-encircled hawk eyes, its hands and arms clasped to its sides as if they were still viable wings. "Squawk! Polly wants a cracker!" it boomed with a rather scratchy, masculine voice, the crest at the back of its head lifting.

Tory and Philips gawked at the giant bird that stood before them, not having a clue of what just happened.

Not getting any immediate attention, 'Polly' hopped down from the short coffee table and began to peck at the carpet like an overgrown chicken.

Philips broke the silence. "We're gonna 'ave some explainin' te do."

**tbc! It's not over yet!**

**Hang on to your hats, here's that special something I mentioned earlier: a sneak-peak at chapter 6: Angels and Troublemakers part 1! Enjoy!**

It was just past one in the afternoon.

"Have you had any lunch, sibling?" Shadow huffed from his new seat.

"Spleen!" was Sonic's reply. He fell to laughing stupidly, leaning bodily on the table, which was now cleared of snakes.

"I'll take that as a 'no'," said the other.

"Finland kidney!" the blue-streak shrieked, pointing to an invisible spot on the wall. "_Oodles_!" he hissed, shifting his gaze about the room suspiciously, as if he was sniffing somebody out.

"I'll make some soup, then. You want any, Knuckles?" Shadow asked, getting up.

"Uh…" The echidna was enthralled by Sonic's new turn in behaviour. He watched as the spiky being lowered himself on his chair so low he began to slide off it, staring at some unseen thing as if it was going to attack him. Sonic quickly forgot this particular game and crawled to the cupboards on his hands and knees, opening them and shoving himself inside amongst the multitudes of pots and pans with a cacophony of clanging metal, his blanket still draped over him; he closed the cupboard door behind him with a shift in the eyes that said 'now you can't see me…'. "…Sure," the redhead replied at last.

**Whaha! That's it! Chapter 5 is coming up next and it'll much longer than 4, I promise! More mystery and idiocy to follow! Onwards but not necessarily upwards!**


	5. Fallible skins

**DISCLAIMERS: Sonic and his sorry excuses for compainions all belong to Sonic Team and Yuji Naka... you know the drill.**

**BUT: Eebon, Tory, Philips, the Studio staff and Sonic's blanket all belong to ME. And so does the gunk on the floor. And the vase that breaks. So there.**

**This chapter will be a little 'darker' towards the middle, but gets better afterwards.**

CHAPTER 5: FALLIBLE SKINS

Knuckles was sweating bullets. 'Sonic' stood behind him, smirking like a devil.

"So," said Eebon critically, "You got him here. Good. Everyone to the back of the set!" he called out, turning around. The mass of feline staff and the three actors migrated to the back wall. "All clear! Let her drop!"

The entirety of Studio Room 45 shook madly from the center outwards, the entire molecular structure of the set changing to meet the director's demands. Props fell out of nowhere, the concrete replaced by green grass, wood bridges and flowing water, creating an Amazonian paradise. The set settling down, Eebon pushed himself away from the wall. "This is the 'Splash Canyon' set!" he explained loudly. "In this scene we'll be having Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles conversing about the legend of the Babylonian Treasure Hunters. Then-where's Wave?" he asked suddenly.

"Here!" came the reply on the other side of the stage. A purple-plumaged swallow-like being waved her hand over the heads of the masses.

"Good!" Eebon continued. "Then Wave will interrupt them and comment on Tails' board and what-not. Get into places! Chop-chop!" he ordered.

"Are you sure about this, Shadow?" Knuckles whispered.

"Of course I am!" he replied.

"But what about your voice?" he pointed out.

"Ah. I knew I was forgetting something! Never fear!" A flask of glowing purple liquid materialised into his hands. He quickly uncorked it and swigged half of its contents. He re-corked it and gave the tiny flask to Knuckles. "Don't loose it," he said in a new voice, walking off.

Knuckles stared at nothing as Shadow-turned-Sonic handed him the glass capsule. Could this day get any weirder? Coming to his senses, he thought about where he was going to put the corked tube. Eebon was getting upset at how slow everyone was moving. Thinking fast he stashed the fluid discretely within the folds and bonds of his left glove; it wouldn't fall out or break as long as he didn't have to deal any punishment with that appendage, and from what he had read in the script so far, he didn't have to.

Everyone got into place, goggles on their heads and air-boards in hand. With the go signal from the red light back on the concrete, everyone got into character and recited their lines. Knuckles acted stubborn and obnoxious, Tails was brainy, and 'Sonic' was friendly and optimistic. The take was nearly flawless, and thanks to that alone Eebon was put into a happier mood. He ordered a few extra takes for back-up material and the sequence was complete.

Next was voice recording. The trio spent the next several hours recording dub reels for the text in several languages as the Room morphed its build once again to accommodate for the team's ever-changing needs. Everything was cut short, however, when distressing news was brought to the director's attention. Even from behind sound-proof glass the fit he was having as a result could still be felt all about Room 45. Afterwards, everyone was dismissed for an early lunch.

Eebon was still screaming hairballs when the actors finally left for some material nourishment. The echidna chewed his brownie thoughtfully; he never really liked Eebon, though he didn't detest him like Sonic did, who recited nearly every day that he wanted the black feline's head on a pike. As far as Knuckles was concerned, Eebon was more or less responsible for Sonic and Shadow's current state of angry existence. Why, exactly, he didn't know; though he had been told that at some point during his Nine Lives, Eebon had brought the brothers over from the Neitherworld and the resulting destruction had levelled half of Studio City and obliterated over two-thirds of the I.S.I.D.'s resources, both mechanical and otherwise. Negotiations had taken days between the courts of the Three Planes, though it was eventually resolved that the blue-furred menace was to be kept under the Institute's careful watch. Shadow had long since escaped before the initial mayhem had even started, but had returned later with a vengeance that wrecked a great deal of havoc in its own right, spreading mass hysteria throughout the human populace. Court had been called again, but still the Institute of Supernatural Interaction and Defence won observation and caretaking rights over the maniacal twins, giving them a chance to restart their lives anew.

The red echidna peered over at the carefree figure of Shadow festering in his brother's skin, eating a sundae without a care in the world, and shuddered. Ever since he had first met Sonic he knew there was something seriously wrong with him, but he never thought that it involved a huge complex centered around a thousand-year-old war and mass extinction. Neither did he know what the blue bundle was capable of until that one fateful evening his mansion-like abode tried to eat them and squash the human inhabitants of the city underfoot. The brothers were bitter creatures, always trying to maim each other whenever the opportunity presented itself, dredging up bygone events he didn't even want to know about in the midst of every argument. The brothers had a dark past, and it was one he didn't want to even scratch the surface of. He jabbed at his hunk of baked chocolate goodness. At least there were things like cake still in the world.

Tails was smudging his food about his plate with his hands, messing up his bleach-white gloves. He didn't brood about much; all he cared to remember was that he once lived in a tree, and that Sonic, his eternal babysitter, wished that he never fell out of it. At least he had cereal.

Shadow ate his sundae in contentment. This wasn't the first time he had worn a false skin, though he liked it less than ever before. Puppets were his specialty, not assuming other people's personalities. He hoped that Eebon would be finished with them soon, as the sickly gunk was starting to loosen slightly. He would have to tighten it, though the result could turn out to be less than desirable. At least it was quiet.

The silence was shattered, however, when a grating voice rent the air. "There he is! Oh my gawd I don't believe it's him! Sonic!" Shadow nearly choked on his ice-cream. Knuckles nearly fed his fork of brownie to his right cheek. Tails did absolutely nothing.

_Fans…_

Shadow and Knuckles peered about simultaneously, looking for the source of the screech. It was Wave, and she was headed their way. The bellbottom-sporting swallow skipped into view from the far tables. Shadow had noticed she had a near-permanent blush while she had been on set with them, though he never stopped to wonder why. Well, now he knew. He looked around frantically, they were the only people in the entire eating area, no where to run, no-one to hide behind.

"Oh my goodness! Sonic! It's really you! I don't believe it! It's such an honour to be working with you!" she squealed excitedly, finally reaching the table. Tails was still completely focused on unintelligent things. Knuckles gave Shadow a panicked glance. Shadow was equally worried. What was he going to do? Obviously this girl wanted attention, but how to respond? Neither he or his brother liked fans, especially giddy fans. But he couldn't just tell her shove-off, this was a co-worker.

"Um. Well. It's a pleasure working with you, as well," he improvised. Oh, if Sonic could see him now; he would retch like a cat with an oversized hairball stuck in its throat. He wasn't feeling too healthy saying the words, either.

"Oh, thank you!" said Wave happily. "I've always dreamed of working with someone as influential as you!" Knuckles nearly dropped his fork.

"Well, dreams can come true if-" he stopped himself. His voice was cracking. The potion was wearing off. He faked a cough.

"Are you alright?" asked the bird anxiously. "Can I get you something?"

"No, thank you," he said carefully, trying to hide his real voice. He faced Knuckles and pinned him with an intense gaze. "Knuckles, I need my cough syrup."

The redhead was at a slight loss. "What?" he said uncertainly.

"My _cough syrup_, Knuckles." He gave him a look that said 'mess this up and I'll hurt you'. "I gave it to you for safekeeping, remember?" he stressed.

"Oh, right!" said Knuckles shakily. He pulled out the tiny glass tube from his left glove and handed it to him.

Shadow downed the rest of the fluid in one gulp. "Ah, much better," he faked, knocking on his chest for effect.

"Oh, dear. Do you have a cold?" questioned Wave.

Shadow fought to keep his phoney cheeriness intact. Why was she still here? He had never really encountered a fan-girl before, Sonic had always been the one being chased down by obsessors of the near-rabid nature; but now it looked like he was getting his fair share. "Something like that," he said.

"You know what would be great for coughs is hot water and honey," she said.

"Oh really." Shadow struggled to keep his comments to himself. Water and honey? He knew much better and more amusing ways to cure something so trivial.

"Oh yes. It sooths the throat, you see," she continued. Wave blathered on, with Shadow as her captive audience.

Knuckles could see that the posing hedgehog wasn't at all amused. However, something would change all that. He began to notice that 'Sonic's' right ear was beginning to sag, and not in a way that was natural, either. He shifted uncomfortably, he may not be educated in the unnatural, but this was definitely telling him that the fake shell was coming loose. The purple swallow-girl was totally oblivious, thankfully; the last thing any of them needed was to escort her to a psychiatric ward because she witnessed the face of her current idol melting off his skull. He shifted in his seat again, unsure of how to broach the subject. He couldn't just butt-in and say, 'hey, your ear's falling off your head,' hell no. Shadow would kill him if he tried to pull something like that.

Wave was still prattling on about something. 'Sonic's' smile was beginning to twitch in irritation ever so slightly. The ear was getting worse, as it continued to ooze downward, a secondary point, signalling the existence of Shadow's body underneath, was beginning to form above the melting mess. The echidna tried to get the hedgehog's attention by staring at him. Shadow didn't like being stared at, and could usually tell if someone was eying him for longer than he deemed necessary. His plan worked, 'Sonic' shifted his gaze in an irritated manner to meet the echidna's stare. Wave was still talking. Knuckles subtly pointed upwards in the general direction of his own right ear, mouthing the words 'your ear'. Shadow's currently green eyes widened. He got the idea.

Reaching up tentatively in the form of an idle scratch the hedgehog felt the mess that was becoming of his fake ear. He instantly clamped his hand over it and stood up, addressing the swallow. "I'm sorry to interrupt you, miss, but I have a pressing matter to attend to. I hope to see you again on set." He quickly exited and made his way to the men's room. Oh heavens he would be eating those words soon enough, he was sure.

Wave was undoubtedly flattered by the kind, though fake, words, and promptly blushed heavily and walked off, lost in some daydream, not giving the others any notice at all. Once she had gone Knuckles got up and followed Shadow, thinking he could need some form of help. Getting to the restroom, he called out, "hey, Shadow, do you need any-" he stopped suddenly, when Shadow turned to face him from the mirrors he had the kind of face that was only seen in Clive Barker horror movies and whacked science fiction flicks. The hedgehog had pulled the skin of the fake face so tightly from the back of the head that the entire face had become distorted, the eyelids and lips pulled unnaturally far from where they should have rightly been. The echidna felt his lunch jump to his chest and he fell back in a swoon. He hit the floor like a two-by-four. "Happy place happy place…" he murmured to himself on the ground.

Shadow looked back into the mirror, and removing one of the outer elastics from his glove he tied it about the loose bunch of flesh like a hair bun and turned back to Knuckles. Kneeling on the floor he shook the traumatised animal back into consciousness.

Knuckles came awake, and promptly screamed a manly scream upon seeing the one true threat to his existence greeting him as the first thing he saw. "I didn't do it!" he cried, covering his head with his arms and hands.

Shadow rolled his eyes. "Knock it off! We're in the men's room, remember?"

Playback of the event quickly came to the echidna. "Oh, yeah. Sorry, Shadow. I honestly thought you were Sonic for a second." He laughed weakly, getting back up on his feet. Shadow didn't seemed to be amused at all. He turned his attention back to the rapidly-loosening second skin, undoing the bun and trying to relocate the lump of extra flesh elsewhere. "So, uh, you need… help?" asked Knuckles quietly, scratching the back of his head in slight embarrassment.

Shadow gave him a look. "That depends," he replied tersely. "Are you going to faint again or are you going to hold your own?"

"I'll be fine."

"Good," said Shadow, still not facing him. "Then you can help me first by removing my glove." He held out his left hand, busy with the loose skin with the other. Knuckles complied and pulled the white bunch of fabric off the other's hand. He caught a flash of what looked like incredibly nasty _talons_ in the place of fingers as Shadow whipped his hand out of sight. The hedgehog forced the misbehaving folds of fake skin to migrate to his left hand, moulding the flesh to meld unobtrusively with the rest of the hand. Done, he turned around and took the glove from Knuckles impatiently. The echidna chanced a glance at the bare hand again but found that the fingers were normal. Shadow felt his stare, he glared at him. "You can go now," he said forcefully.

The redhead left quickly, pondering over what he had just seen. Was he seeing things? Maybe he was just overworked. Or maybe he was just a little jumpy. He made his way back to the table where Tails had successfully covered his end with smeared food.

Shadow flexed his hand, testing the makeshift repair. The fingers bent stiffly, they were slightly thicker than those on his right hand but no-one would notice. He looked to the door where Knuckles had left. He may have seen something, but he would have to let it go. The echidna could be real simpleton but he was also observant; he would have to be more careful in the future, he didn't need to know any more about him and his sibling than he already did, which was, comparatively, not much.

X X X X

Eebon was still throwing fits when they returned, stamping his feet and flailing his arms like a giant three-year-old having a temper-tantrum. A younger member of the staff came up to the cartoon heroes to explain things. "Something's up with the main actor for the Babylon Team," he said. "The guy who plays Jet can't make it. Or won't come, really. He got a different offer from another director and he took it, leaving Eebon high and dry." He scuttled away. Knuckles and 'Sonic' exchanged glances; what would this mean for them? What would this mean for the game's production? At the rate things were going, if Eebon didn't calm down soon they would never get anything else done that day.

The ebony feline's fits were increasing in intensity. He looked like he was about to burst multiple veins at once. All of a sudden he stopped shouting and took a deep breath, recomposing himself instantly. He turned to the stricken actors. "Alright. We have a slight problem that is causing a hold-up in production and we can't do anything about it right now, and thus we can't continue our work for the time being. You're all…" he fumbled for words. "…free… to go home early," he cringed noticeably at the words. "You will all be contacted as soon as we can pick up where we left off." By the time he had finished his sentence Room 45 was empty save for a few stragglers who were caught in the wave of mass-movement. The Sega stars were well out of the director's reach by the time they stopped running, taking a breather at the Main Hall. From that point they walked leisurely to the front of the Studio, taking in the sounds of other games-and-videos-in-progress. _Psychonaughts_ was underway in one Room, with _Final Fantasy XXI_ going on in another not a few feet away.

Reaching the Main Foyer the three companions left the premises. Hardly a few feet from the door 'Sonic' stopped abruptly in his tracks. Not too far ahead of them was Wave, looking for them. She hadn't seen them yet. Shadow looked around frantically for cover. Spotting a conveniently large bush beside the sidewalk he promptly dove behind it. Sticking his head out he said "keep her away! And anyone else! I'm removing this horrid skin!" The echidna took a visible take and Tails began to skip in circles, humming a nameless tune. He heard a distinct sucking noise, like someone trying to remove duct-tape from Velcro on a toilet plunger while plunging a toilet. Within moments Shadow reappeared from the depths of the bush, picking off stray bits of fake flesh from his person, draping the false skin over his arm as if it were a piece of high-end fashion. "Alright," he said, peeling a lingering vein from his shoulder, "let's go."

Knuckles stopped him. "You still have Sonic's voice," he said. Shadow considered this, humming and looking up at the sky.

"Okay, then," he said at last. "We'll take a detour," he said with a grin.

Knuckles didn't like the look of that grin, not one bit. "A detour?" he questioned.

"An alternate route. Is that so hard to understand?" the hedgehog quipped.

"I'm not stupid!" he retorted hotly. "I know what a detour is! I'm just not so sure about what you may consider a 'detour'," he snapped. Tails wove his way between the two actors' legs repeatedly, having the time of his life.

"Don't be so quick to assume that my ways of alternate travel are so horrid, Knuckles," pouted Shadow. "Though you would be right in this regard," he said, brightening instantly. He grabbed the stunned echidna's arm and one of Tails' tails, cackling maniacally. A portal opened beneath their feet, spilling them into a pulsing purple-red vortex of… something. Shadow was laughing like a possessed clown. Knuckles was screeching like the victim of 'IT! came from outer space!' Tails was whooping as if he was on a rollercoaster ride. Horrible sounds of tortured voices emanated from every direction like a horror fun-house. Ghastly hands reached for them from out of nowhere, crying for vengeance for some bygone deed.

Down, down, down they fell. Knuckles had long since lost his voice but Shadow was still cackling away. He was enjoying every minute of his freak-ride, dragging the others with him unto the black pit that finally signalled the end of their plummet. There was a bright flash and they found themselves in front of their massive home, a ring of ectoplasmic goo signifying the existence of the brief breach in the reality continuum. Knuckles fell to his knees, wheezing madly, and began to crawl to the relative safety of the house. "Don't you ever do that again!" he huffed at Shadow as they reached the door. Shadow grinned evilly and brought out the keys, still carrying the second skin.

"Aahh," he sighed wistfully, his voice returning to normal. "That was fun." Tails wobbled up the walkway to the front door like a fat penguin, completely unfazed by the ethereal trip. With a sharp click the door unlocked and the three stepped inside. Shadow kicked away some of the bubbles that had made their way to the front door. "We're home!" he called out sweetly, a toothy grin spread over his face. "Where are you, dear sibling?"

Knuckles lowered himself bodily to the ground, expecting some sort of projectile to answer the sickly-sweet jeer. In a way he was right. Sonic came barrelling out of nowhere, draped in a new, much thicker blanket, hitting a wall then righting himself in an attempt to face in their general direction. "'OU!" he shrieked, sniffling, trying to apparently point an accusing finger at his brother, succeeding in jabbing his right index digit at the coat hanger. He looked awful and totally wasted.

"Over here, sibling," sniggered the black hedgehog, dumping the fake skin in a corner.

Sonic whirled to 'face' his antagonist, nearly falling over. He fixated his bleary gaze on his hated brother, seething with anger and several kinds of 'ick'. "'ou!" he said again, jabbing his finger into his brother's chest this time. "'ou 'astard! 'ou're tryin' t' 'o me in!" he accused loudly. "'ou're tryin' t' GILL me!"

"Trust me, brother, I had no intensions of killing you today," he said indifferently, taking a-hold of Sonic's shoulders and spinning him around to lead him to the kitchen table. "I'm having much more fun watching you become delirious with sickness."

"I 'ate 'ou," snorted Sonic.

Knuckles was appalled at the fact that Shadow was even _touching_ his brother while he was in such a terrible state of un-health. Sonic was so pale he was nearly white, covered in unsightly blotches and his eyes were an infected colour of yellow with more than enough dark rings around them. He was shaking from head to foot and looked like he had the molecular consistency of a sponge. Knuckles had never really seen the brothers ever get sick, they had immune systems comparable to that of a steel box; this was the first time he'd seen either of them ill. Needless to say it was making him weak in the knees. Emerging from the door-area with Tails he found that the entire kitchen was coated in phantasmagorical translucent goo, as was the living room, and probably all of the rest of the main floor, he thought wretchedly. Tails ploughed forward, slipping in a pool of the gunk and went sailing bodily into the far wall with a crash of something breakable, whooping.

Shadow had sat his brother down at the kitchen table, which was still covered in snakes. "How about some tea, sibling?" he asked, grinning in a manner that just screamed 'evil'.

"Screw you," managed the blue bundle of yuck, snorting a snake back up his nose. "I know your plan," he hissed, hacking. "You're tryin' t' take my mind an' loc' me a'ay!"

"What'd he say?" asked Knuckles, clearly lost at the other's complete abandonment of proper English.

"Oh, he's just complaining. Saying I'm trying to drive him crazy and get him locked up under the pretense of insanity," he translated, shaking his head. "He goes on like this every time." He commenced making a fresh batch of tea.

Sonic shook in his chair like a shorted cell-phone set on 'vibrate'.

The forgotten Insitutionaries came out from the living room, trying to avoid the scattered piles of gunk and critters splattered about the floor. "Hello, Tory, Philips," greeted Shadow, not turning from the counter.

"What happened to your coat?" asked the echidna.

"It turned into an imp and ran away," replied the silver-haired man with a huff. "Shadow," he said after a while. "We need to talk to you about your bird."

"My what?" he questioned.

Sonic laughed, an unwholesome sound that quickly degraded into a hacking cough.

"Your bird," repeated Tory tersely.

"Oh!" said the dark hedgehog, memory kicking in. "My Polly Perkins! How is she?"

"Well…" began Philips.

"Your 'miss 'olly 'erkins' ain't a she no 'ore," wheezed Sonic maniacally.

"What do you mean!" demanded Shadow, a cruel scowl twisting over his features. The cutlery and china behind him were beginning to rattle in their cupboards with the rise in the hedgehog's normally-dormant temper. "What did you do?" he interrogated dangerously, shifting his gaze from his wickedly grinning brother to the two worried-looking men. "What happened?" he said slowly.

"POLLY WANTS A CRACKER!" came a thundering cry as a mass of emerald feathers ploughed through the side hallway, streaking straight for Shadow, flapping its arms in vain attempts at flight. The poor black and red furred beast could but only let loose a little 'eek!' before being bowled over by his mutated pet. The oversized bird stood on the downed body of its owner innocently, peering about through great hunter's eyes. "Squawk! Polly wants a cracker!" it said again.

Shadow shook his head to clear his vision. He gawped at what he saw standing indignantly on his chest.

Sonic was laughing sickly to himself. "Ha! Say 'ello 'o your 'aster, 'olly!" he cackled.

Shadow was livid. "What did you do!" he shrieked, getting up as Polly hopped off his chest. He marched up to his delirious brother and shook him by the shoulders. Sonic just continued to laugh. Knuckles stared at the bird in disbelief as it pecked at the counter. Tails was still cavorting about in the gunked-up living room. Shadow turned his fiery gaze to the two sitters. "What happened!" he demanded, ears flat against his head in agitation.

"Sonic sneezed on it," said Tory simply. Short, sweet and to the point. Philips gripped his twelve-gauge.

"He _what_!" Some china shattered in the cupboards of their own volition.

Sonic laughed like a banshee.

"Squawk! Polly wants a cracker!" shouted the bird.

"Oh, heavens…" sighed Shadow, about to take a seat in the chair he had sat in that morning. "Sonic, I'll have you know that-AUG!" he jumped out of his seat as his posterior connected with the slime-coated sheets he dragged downstairs with him earlier that day. Polly squawked at the sudden noise. Sonic laughed harder, wheezing, his discoloured eyes squeezed shut in mirth; he swayed and nearly fell off his chair.

Tory thought that now was a good time to take leave. Leading Philips through the mulch on the floor he made his way to the front door. Shadow had gone back to shaking his stricken brother, yelling 'look what you did to Polly!' over and over again. Sonic continued to laugh and gurgle in his seat, totally consumed in some feverish delirium. Knuckles watched the two humans leave the house and speed away in the Jeep from the front steps, looking about outside uncertainly before closing the door again.

**tbc! Things start gettin' really weird now! Whaha! Remember: check out my main page for explainations and coming attractions! Remeber also... R&R PEOPLE! Do you love it? Do you hate it? TELL ME! But no flames. Flame me and I'll hex you.**


	6. Angels and troublemakers pt1

**DISCLAIMERS: Sonic and his peons belong to the Sonic Team and Yuji Naka.**

**BUT: The winged people and the up-tight General are mine. So HA! And the invisible invader is mine, too. As is the snot on the floor, and whatever spills out of the cupboards.**

**Note to all: Most of the nonsense spouted in this chapter, and in future chapters, is comprised completely of words I made up... or my younger siblings made up at some point in their lives but I somehow remember (It must be painfully clear by now through half the crap I spew that I have younger brothers... you know... constant nose-picking... that sort of thing). A prize few words are actually real, and they're obvious.**

**Read and review please! Constructive crit and such is much appreciated! Even just saying you like it is nice. I need to feel loved. Yes, I realise that sounds corny.**

**Now READ!

* * *

**

CHAPTER 6: ANGELS AND TROUBLEMAKERS part 1

Things had calmed down somewhat. Polly amused itself by pecking at the weave in the living room carpet. Tails made mud pies out of the gunk on the floor and tried to feed them to everyone. Knuckles was wondering what happened to his normal life. Shadow was sulking in a new chair. Sonic was still giggling in his delirium, though at what was anybody's guess.

It was just past one in the afternoon.

"Have you had any lunch, sibling?" Shadow huffed from his new seat.

"Spleen!" was Sonic's reply. He fell to laughing stupidly, leaning bodily on the table, which was now cleared of snakes.

"I'll take that as a 'no'," said the other.

"Finland kidney!" the blue-streak shrieked, pointing to an invisible spot on the wall. "_Oodles_!" he hissed, shifting his gaze about the room suspiciously, as if he was sniffing somebody out.

"I'll make some soup, then. You want any, Knuckles?" Shadow asked, getting up.

"Uh…" The echidna was enthralled by Sonic's new turn in behaviour. He watched as the spiky being lowered himself on his chair so low he began to slide off it, staring at some unseen thing as if it was going to attack him. Sonic quickly forgot this particular game and crawled to the cupboards on his hands and knees, opening them and shoving himself inside amongst the multitudes of pots and pans with a cacophony of clanging metal, his blanket still draped over him; he closed the cupboard door behind him with a shift in the eyes that said 'now you can't see me…'. "…Sure," the redhead replied at last.

Shadow began to prepare a pot of chicken-noodle broth, turning on the burners on the stove that sat on the right side of the kitchen. Looking back he tried to locate his germ-crazed brother. "Where's Sonic?" he asked. A string of metallic bangs sounding from the cupboards answered his question. Huffing in exasperation he walked over to the furthest cupboard door, the one Sonic had shoved himself into, and pulled it open to peer inside. Much to his and Knuckles' surprise there was no sign of the blue hog. Another round of bangs emanated from the other end of the line of cupboards, near the stove. Leaving the other door open Shadow stalked over to where the sound was now coming from. As he neared, the noise stopped. The black hedgehog stood stock still before the last cupboard. Knuckles, totally caught up in it all, sat in complete silence, hardly breathing. There was a tiny rustle of cookware and Shadow yanked the cupboard door open with blinding speed. A mess of pots greeted him. Clanging rose and moved down the line of cupboards again, migrating back down to the other end. Shadow tip-toed along with the trail of noise, following it carefully, hunched over, as if he was tracking game. The echidna could see Sonic coming down the lane of cupboards through the door Shadow had left open. The blue-furred mammal had the wildest look in his eyes. He crawled over the mess of pots slowly, deftly now, making no noise whatsoever. His brother continued to track him from the outside, following his every move without fault. They both stopped at the exact same moment, Sonic looking around in his pen as if to pin down something that had invaded his personal space, Shadow inched silently towards the new door, grasping the handle. Sonic froze. Shadow yanked the door open and grabbed his twin by the blanket, hauling him out as he fought for his quilt, dragging an assortment of pots out into the open with him.

"Gimme! Shiddlekins!" shrieked Sonic as he was towed across the filth-ridden floor by his blanket. Shadow dropped him by his seat, walking back to tend to the soup.

"You stay there!" he ordered.

"Nirk blek!" retorted his sibling, standing on his knees.

"Sit down in your seat," said Shadow, not turning around.

"Squickum!" shot Sonic.

"Don't you back-sass me!"

"Flark!" said the other, wrapping the blanket around his head and rolling about the floor like a mutilated rubber ball.

Knuckles pinched himself, and thus clarified to his confused conscious that he was indeed awake.

His head still wrapped in his quilt, Sonic began to scrub the floor with it, pushing the masses of ick and yuck about the tiled ground as he went.

The soup ready, Shadow poured three bowls, as Tails was treating himself to the hoard of crackers the hedgehog had left out for Polly. Sonic continued to vaguely clean the floor with his face, pushing himself over the ground on his hands and knees. He mowed across the kitchen floor, banging into Knuckles' chair and knocking into his brother's legs. "For heaven's sake sit down!" scolded the healthier of the two.

"Meklarf!" spat Sonic from inside his wrappings, ploughing onward straight into the fridge.

Placing the bowls on the table, Shadow turned around and kicked his fraternal twin in the ribs, not too hard, to get him to stand up.

"Swibble!" he cursed, quilt falling from his head.

"Sit down, you ninny!"

"Swee! Dimble nox flut!" he said.

Shadow glared at Sonic. "You will sit down and eat your soup like a normal, well-behaved person," he directed.

Sonic spat at him.

"Get up off the floor!" he ordered.

"Umnarg crag!"

Shadow huffed and put his hands on his hips. "Get. Up."

"Slos!"

"You are going to haul your behind to your seat right now!"

"Shoplik hilnun flak!"

Shadow gasped. "Don't you start!"

"Glot!" Sonic crossed his arms and remained plastered to the floor, turning his back to his sibling.

Shadow grabbed his brother's shoulders from behind and pushed him across the slick floor to his seat. "There! Now eat!"

"Pancreas!"

"Oh shush!"

Knuckles sat with his spoon poised in the air, watching the brothers fight what seemed to him a very one-sided argument. He retained his stoic pose as the two quarrelsome beings sat down to eat. Seeming that the nonsense had died away, he took his first tentative bite.

Sonic, on the other hand, took his first spoonful and, making a hideous face, promptly spat it out across the table. "Gluggen shwender hikker!" he shouted.

"Shut up and eat it anyway," retorted Shadow.

Sonic glared at him through bloodshot yellow eyes. "Finkin! Uwager yinni glagek fuum!"

"Just eat it, you stupid pansy, its _not_ going to bite you."

"Fanarkim!" he shrieked, pointing at him.

Shadow ignored him.

"Blorpen shniggen horse!"

"No. If anyone was going to do that, it would have been you."

"Yop! Florpen drep!"

"I'm not listening to your senseless accusations anymore."

"Forg hukle getengit," he said softly to himself. He poked at his spoon with a shaking finger. He looked almost as if he was on a sugar high. He placed his hands on the table and pulled them back abruptly, screaming. "Flaargh! Wipol yug!"

Shadow let his head drop to the table loudly in exasperation.

Sonic continued to yell, pointing to an invisible invader on the table, his pupils badly dilated. "SPLEEN!"

Knuckles eyed him fearfully, shifting his chair away with a scrape.

Sonic's finger travelled over the table's surface slowly, tracing his unseen aggressor's path. "GLOFF!"

Shadow still hadn't taken his head from the table.

Sonic took his bowl and bashed the bottom of it over his attacker, spilling soup everywhere. "Makken dlarp!" he cried.

Shadow still didn't move. Knuckles was getting worried. He wasn't very sure he liked this new Sonic at all.

"Snorf! Blekkom jig!" Sonic lifted the bowl cautiously to peer at the invisible carnage beneath it. He immediately slammed the bowl back down upon whatever unfortunate being he had claimed as his harasser. "YOR!" He got on top of the table and sat on his bowl.

Shadow gave up. He drank down the last of his soup and retreated to the sink. He commenced washing the dishes. Knuckles relocated himself for the betterment of his overall health as Sonic continued to mutter to himself, still shaking uncontrollably.

Shadow was filling the sink when he suddenly began to back away from the window. Knuckles looked at him in a puzzled manner as he dove away from the sink. The window and the surrounding wall instantly blew apart seconds later, littering the kitchen and much of the conjoining living room with debris. Both the echidna and the two hedgehogs were blown against the wall from the force of the blast. As the dust and insulation settled, what stood in the gapping hole in the wall was a creature unlike anything Knuckles had ever seen, though he could easily tell what it was: an Aingell.

The dark hedgehog caught sight of the radiant being and began to crawl over to the far corner, grabbing Tails' school back-pack and shoving something into it.

DO NOT TRY TO ESCAPE, said the feathered entity, speaking and yet not speaking. The Aingell was armed with a wickedly serrated sword. Two more of the same creatures descended into view, armed in the same fashion as their predecessor.

Tails and Polly were surrounded by lesser angelic beings while Knuckles, Shadow and Sonic were cornered by the three greater Aingells. Within seconds the five giant animals were herded into a small group, surrounded by the emotionless beings. Sonic clutched at his filthy blanket. Shadow kept the little school bag close. Tails picked his nose, staring at the nearest of the masked winged things as he dug for gold. "What're you?" he asked casually.

DO NOT TRY TO ESCAPE, replied the thing.

"Why?" asked Tails.

DO NOT TRY TO ESCAPE, it repeated.

"Why?" asked the fox again, finger still lodged in his right nostril.

DO NOT TRY TO ESCAPE.

"Wh-" began Tails. Shadow stopped him, his nerves already frayed from dealing with his brother's delirious gibberish. The fox remained silent, though he continued to dig to unperceivable depths in his incredibly small nose.

Sonic was rocking back and forth while he sat, caressing his dirty quilt, shaking as if he had been struck by a bolt of lightning. For the first time since the others returned, he sneezed. Snakes and insects coated in translucent ooze took flight from his nose, splattering all over one of the smaller of the greater Aingells. The creature shrieked from within its mask, its armour bubbling and melting away. Knuckles watched in horror as the thing failed to remove its impractical dressings in time, its entire body disintegrating from the toxins encased in Sonic's nose-mucus. The other Aingells remained unmoved as their fellow entity melted into a steaming pile of gunk, the last of its feathers burning away.

DO NOT TRY TO ESCAPE, came the drone.

The echidna had had enough. "Escape?" he got up, the look of a wild animal burning in his eyes. "If anything, we could dance away from all this just by aiming those blasted sneezes! Watch who you're messing with, you oversized tin-can!"

Shadow was surprised at this sudden outburst.

DO NOT TRY TO ESCAPE, said the guard.

"OH SHUT UP!" screamed Knuckles, grabbing a fistful of the gunk on the floor and hurling it at the eight-foot being. "THIS IS FOR MAKING MY DAY WORSE THAN IT ALREADY IS!"

The Aingell's armour and clothing instantly began to sizzle and corrode as the lump of gunk hit it squarely in the chest. Knuckles scooped up another lump of the junk. Shadow was astounded, and grabbing a mud pie that Tails had baked earlier, began to mirror his actions, beginning an all-out assault on the guards. Tails joined in too, making the ammunition. Sonic was wearing his quilt like a bonnet, muttering to himself still. Polly squawked absently.

The Aingells managed a look of slight surprise on their placid faces as their prisoners rebelled against them. Shadow felt absolutely no remorse at the destruction of these beings; Aingells were machines, more or less, possessing no emotion and unable to think for themselves in any way. They were the cannon-fodder of the cloud-dwelling nobles of Nervanna. However, that generally meant that wherever an Aingell was, a commander wouldn't be far behind. This point was proven as the last of the winged beings was reduced to white sludge. A prismatic shield appeared and encased the animals within it as the sound of rhythmic clapping rose from the hole in the wall. Standing in the full sunlight was obviously the director of the fallen Aingells' attack. "Well done, well done," he said, still clapping his gloved hands slowly, a straight expression stretched over his face. Knuckles tried to melt the cage away with his landlord's snot, rubbing it over the wall of their cage in hopes of freedom. "You won't get out that way," said the General, clasping his hands behind his back. He made his way forward, his pearly, gold-laced uniform glinting in the light. He glared down at the pitiful creatures over his huge chest with his steely eyes.

Sonic looked up with the blanket still done up as a bonnet. "Swarken himmerfik!" he shouted, pointing a shaking finger at the General, looking quite crazed.

The General was unmoved. "We've finally found you," he said coldly, staring down at the diminutive pale being.

Knuckles nudged Shadow. "What is he saying, anyway?" he asked softly.

"Oh, nothing. Its gibberish. It doesn't mean anything," he replied.

"So, this entire time he was talking… stupid?"

"Yup."

"But what about the argument you two had? At the table?"

"Still gibberish. It's like what I said before; when you've been around him long enough-"

"-you already know what he's going to say," he finished for him.

"Precisely. Even when he's feverishly hallucinating."

"Dibber incum fak!" shrieked Sonic, shaking a delirious fist at the General.

"I see you've degraded into a nothing more than a sickly fool once more," sneered the general, pale eyes trained on the distressed animal.

Shadow glared at the giant being through the miasma that had begun to rise from the steaming Aingell corpses beyond the shield. "That 'sickly fool' is my brother, and you would do well to remember it," he said dangerously.

"Scum," addressed the General, turning to Shadow.

"Hello, General. It's been a while."

"You know him?" asked Knuckles incredulously.

"I'm surprised you found us," he continued, ignoring the redhead.

"You can't run forever," said the giant.

"We weren't running," he replied, the back-pack slung over his shoulder. "We don't run, and you know it."

"Humph," snorted the winged General. "Either way, you belong to us now, as it should have been before." He spun on his heel and marched away. The transparent bubble-of-a-cage lifted from the ground as three Aingells took a-hold of the three chains that materialised from the prison's sides to follow after the commanding figure, taking their prisoners with them.

* * *

**TBC! Yes, some plot! Prepare yourselves, readers! Not to worry, I garuntee that the general flow of stupid won't be cut! But even so, all stories must have a point, yes?**


	7. Angels and troublemakers pt2

**DISCLAIMERS: Sonic and sad sidekicks are copyrighted to the Sonic Team and Yuji Naka.**

**BUT: Everything else is mine.**

**Yes, it's a bit short, but it's got a kick-ass action scene! And more plot! And a house with a lawn!**

**I'm sorry about the late update... the system was acting up on me last week, so I couldn't really do anything. So all you patient people out there get TWO, count 'em, TWO chapters this week!

* * *

**

CHAPTER 7: ANGELS AND TROUBLEMAKERS part 2

Guinness Core sped down the streets in the Jeep, easily breaking the speed-limit. Tory, Spence, Philips and Jonesey bounced about in the back, hanging on to anything bolted to the floor for dear life. The living vehicle rocketed through the Sunny Wing residential district, speeding for the largest house in the neighbourhood. Reaching their destination, Core and the rest of the Team shot from the vehicle, stopping before a heap of rubble that had once been the conjoining wall between the kitchen and the living room of the Sonic Twins' home. The Team gazed over the carnage left behind from the attack in shock. Core surveyed the damage with a fierce scowl. They were too late. The house gave an awkward shudder and the entire Team, save Core, took a collective step back. "What's going on?" shouted Jonesey over the rumbling. "It shouldn't fall! Most of the supports are still left!"

"It's not collapsing," said Core, not tearing his gaze from the interior of the massive house. "It's reacting."

"Reacting to what?" questioned Tory as the house released another shudder, bigger this time. "Sure seems like its falling to me!"

Core wasn't listening, he pressed a finger to his right ear to contact another back at the Institute. "Where are they?" he asked.

"I have them, sir!" came the reply. "They're heading for the Waygate in the north!"

"The Waygate?" repeated Core, frowning. "That would be a risky move on their part. Are you sure?" he questioned.

"Undoubtedly, sir. The watchmen stationed there will be under attack within five minutes!"

"Tell them to prepare for a hostile encounter! Send the nearest reinforcements to their location immediately! Give them directions to keep the holding cell intact above all else!"

"Not to free the captives, sir?" questioned the man at the radar.

"Yes. The Twins are not to get free. One of them is a carrier of what could be the next epidemic since the Black Plague."

"R-right, sir! I'll send the order immediately!"

Core cut the line. The oversized house gave another shudder, setting the entire group off balance. A low symphony of ghastly cries began to emanate from inside the mansion, chilling the air with an otherworldly wind. The lawn began to pulse rhythmically. "It's happening a lot faster this time," he said to himself.

"What?" interrogated Tory as another tremor shook the foundations of the neighbourhood. "What's happening?" Some of the neighbours were beginning to bail from their homes, packing their kids and pets into their cars and speeding off. "What is happening!" he repeated to the Director.

"Philips," addressed Core, turning to the armed redhead. "Use the Jeep's radio to contact the Spirit Division, I want as many exorcists at this spot as soon as possible. I don't care if they have to _fly_ in with jets, just get them here!"

Philips dashed to the Jeep's intercom, repeating the Director's request to those on the other line.

Tory gazed into the house's depths from outside. He caught sight of something moving deep within, weaving out of sight a second later. He turned to the Director. "What's happening?" he asked again softly, not taking his eyes from the mansion's interior. He didn't like the look of this, not one bit.

"With Sonic gone, the constraints placed on the spirits he locked away into this house are breaking. Until we get him back the seals will continue to rot and more of them," he gazed at another shifting shade slipping about the house's shadows, "will be set free."

"But Sonic leaves the house all the time! To work and… whatever! Why is this happening now?"

"Because he was taken by force; and the farther he is taken, the quicker the house's defences drain away." A scream sounded from the basement. "For now they're shut inside the walls of the house." The lawn continued to pitch and roll. "Eventually that won't be enough, then they'll be out in the open in the yard." He turned to face the outer perimeter of the brothers' property. "The fence is the last defence against a complete break-out. Once that falls nothing will hold them back. It'll be our job to keep that from happening until we get that lot back here."

Tory nodded numbly in understanding. He remembered now; the entire Sunny Wing district used to be haunted, keeping anyone from moving in. It had been costing the City untold amounts of money to deal with, and nothing worked. Exorcists and holy men of all kinds were chased from wherever they had been stationed, creating enough panic that the entire population opted for evacuation, though the spirits never left the grounds of that stretch of land. That's when Sonic had come in, before Tory had become a part of the force, and somehow made all the oppressive phantasms simply _disappear_. He then had his pick out of the entire district and settled there and that was that, hardly a creak from the unnatural prisoners within until years later… and then now. Tory was at a loss. At most, like Core said, all they could do was hold the mass of angry apparitions at bay until the unnatural force of the blue furred menace returned.

* * *

The battalion of winged folk sped through the air in formation, surrounding their gem-faced prison on all sides. The entire group sat in complete silence with only the occasional twitter from the mutated 'miss' Polly Perkins. Knuckles sat in contemplation; what was going to happen to them? Where were they going? Tails was still digging around in his nose, now working on his left nostril. Shadow was dozing in his corner while his sibling picked at invisible silk worms on his blanket, getting more impossibly ill-looking by the minute. Since they had left the brothers' property the echidna could feel a thick, invisible miasma begin to form in the shield's limited airspace, making him weak in the stomach. The General was soaring in front of them, with three of his best 'men' flying beside and behind the prison, guiding it with shimmering links of spirit chain.

They were flying over unfamiliar territory. Knuckles had never gone this far outside Studio City. The land below them was lush and green, covered in trees still in bloom from the bygone spring. He could see a single road weave about the landscape, devoid of any vehicles. Shifting his gaze to peer up ahead, he saw that they were approaching what looked like a small operations base. Commotion sounded at the front as the General directed the forces ahead of them to descend upon the humans stationed there. Gunfire instantly erupted from the ground as the mortal beings below began to open fire on the radiant aerial flotilla. The General and the three greater Aingells doubled their airspeed as the formation broke apart to wage war.

The racket roused Shadow from his nap as Polly flapped its arms, batting him in the head. "Wha's happenin'?" he yawned.

Sonic clutched at his blanket. "Whoppen rok!" he cried, shooting Shadow an accusing glare.

"I wasn't talking to you," replied Shadow angrily.

"Klorggen whimmik!" he blasted, spit flying from his mouth. "Derhop kriggan blahs!"

"I'm not going to touch your blanket, you dimwitted ninny-hammer! Now shush!"

"Flor!" he retorted, clinging to his treasured piece of fabric.

"We're flying over some base," said Knuckles.

"We are?" questioned Shadow. He looked down through the transparent shield that held them captive. "You're right," he said. "Wait a minute…" he added, peering over the landscape more carefully. "I know where we are! We're over the watch station that guards the Waygate to Nervanna!"

"What do you mean?"

"It means that we're being taken to our illustrious prison-driver's base of operations in the Upper Plane."

Knuckles went pale. Nervanna wasn't exactly a tourist stop under any circumstances. From what he had heard over the course of his life it sounded as though the Upper plane wasn't much worse than the Lower Plane, the Neitherworld. Nervanna was constantly at war with itself, the various lords and ladies stationed in the skies battling against each other for reasons that ranged from foolhardy to irrational to just plain ludicrous. The various forces at work were always on the lookout for new weapons to obliterate each other with. The Upper Plane was best known for its marvel of alien technology, The Deliverer. The monstrous machine was built atop the highest mountain in the only Neutral Zone in Nervanna, constantly recycling the souls lost in battle to spit them back out as new beings, forever restocking the rosters of the Plane's armies. The constant cycle of death and rebirth unto service was vicious and unbreakable as long as the nations warred against each other. "Ug. I don't wanna go," he whined.

"Well neither do we but there's nothing we can do about it at the moment I'm afraid," consoled Shadow, not really helping the situation.

"What do they want us for? They look for weapons, not people! We're innocent bystanders!"

Shadow arched an eyebrow at him, wordlessly telling him to rethink what he just said. Sonic hacked sickly in the background. Realisation dawned on the poor echidna.

A slight whining noise sounded and one of the greater Aingells plummeted from its post at the shield's side, a round of rifle ammunition lodged on the inside of its mask. The prison rocked from the loss in support and lost much of its speed as the chain of spirit links fell limp to the side, weighing it down. Everyone inside slid to the tipped end of the cell, further throwing the last two carriers off balance. The surprised General was knocked from the skies as one of his subordinates fell from above him, dead from an armour-piercing round to the chest. The commander was dragged down with the heavenly cadaver as the other two Aingells flew onward mechanically, undeterred.

"It seems as though someone is more or less trying to save us," said Shadow as another bullet whizzed precariously close to another of the remaining carriers. "Everyone stand up!" he ordered suddenly. All present, even Polly, obeyed.

"What're we going to do?"

"We're going to make a little hell for our pulley-men," he said. "Now, everyone, when I say 'jump', we all jump at once, understand?"

"Polly wants a cracker!"

"Ikkum blop!"

"Wee!"

"Okay."

"Good! Then here we go! One, two, three, jump!" The entire gang did as directed, the mass of movement causing the Aingells to loose their grip on the chains and loose their balance considerably. "Again! Jump!" They jumped again, dragging the two struggling Aingells down to the ground inch by inch. As they continued to jump on order the battle raged on, winged beings and bullets flying everywhere. With another jump the facetted cell descended several feet in the air, dropping one of the carriers straight into the path of another feathered warrior, tearing him from the chain with a sickening crunch of armour and bone. The five animals fell to the side as the balance was once again shifted. The shield plummeted down to earth as the remaining masked creature tried in vain to keep it aloft.

As the cage fell the quintet of anthropomorphic beings struggled to remain calm and uninjured as their holding cell bashed into several flying bodies that couldn't get out of the shield's path of rapid descent, though this was proving quite difficult with a giant parrot and a delirious maniac on board. The group screamed as a single entity as the ground quickly rushed up to met them. With a collective 'oof!' and a jarring of bones they hit the earth. The impact knocked them all senseless and against the walls, though thankfully the drag from the struggling Aingell kept them from falling at a speed that would have otherwise broken their bones to pieces. The remaining carrier smacked into the earth at the same speed, still clutching the chain.

Utter chaos was all about them, both sides taking hits and losses. As the five giant beasts pulled themselves from the floor of their cage, the greater Aingell struggled to heave itself from the ground, its mask and armour badly dented from the fall. Shadow wasn't about to succumb yet, and he wasn't going to let the other's, either. "Get up! The lot of you!" he ordered, hauling his brother to his feet with one hand. Unable to disobey, the rest all got up as well. "Now run!" They all got the idea. The circular cage rolled like a hamster ball, the last link of chain wrenching from the injured Aingell's grasp. The being chased after the shield as it rolled away. "Don't stop!" ordered the black and red hedgehog, his voice working an odd form of control over the actions of the others, save his sibling, who he was dragging by the hand. "Faster!" he cried. The echidna found this strange, the way he couldn't help but obey as Shadow ordered. Of course he wanted to escape, but he found the force used in the other's voice incredibly, unnaturally, persuasive. "Right turn!" the hedgehog commanded. The throng moved as one at his request. The pursuing Aingell skidded across the green turf in attempt to follow the prison-turned-escape-vehicle, managing to maintain a near-constant level of distance between itself and its target. The battle raged all around them. Some of the men defending the base had taken notice of their plight and began to shoot at the feathered being chasing after them amongst the chaos. "Right turn!" They all turned as a wall veered up before them. The crazed Aingell followed still, its limbs oozing dark life fluids from its fresh wounds as it continued to chase them. "Right turn!" The exhausted group obeyed as another Aingell descended from the sky to block their path. More of the angelic beings began to do the same, trying to cut-off the creatures and block them in. Shadow was shouting directions left, right and center, trying to keep them from hitting any obstacle large enough to throw them off their course for freedom. The group was tiring quickly from the overexertion. They made another sharp turn to avoid a falling corpse, rolling for the base's exit to hopefully hide within the cover of the trees. As they ploughed across the green, a body lifted itself from the spread of mayhem ahead of them. The General. "Reverse!" shrieked Shadow as the giant hauled himself from the ground. Their switch was quick; but the enraged creature was quicker, he managed to grab two of the orbiting spirit chains, and with a yank in his direction effectively stopped their retreat. With a deep huff he took all three lengths of chain in his grasp and shot into the air with a single beat of his wings.

The General ploughed through the air at a maddening speed, heading straight for the Waygate. The cage hung low to the ground, knocking against vehicles and other objects, keeping the captives off balance and unable to coordinate in any way. The permanent, shimmering opening of the Waygate yawned before them. Nearly all of the defending fire was trained on the single being now, the humans trying their best to knock him from the sky. The distance between the General and the massive portal continued to shorten at an alarming rate. With several forced beats of his feathered secondary appendages he rose higher into the air. Getting desperate, some of the defenders had begun to resort to using grenades. The miniature explosives erupted into flame all around the retreating being, throwing him off his course ever so slightly as he swerved to avoid the brunt of the blasts. All efforts amounted to no avail as the commander finally made contact with the ethereal surface of the Waygate, instantly vanishing from sight with his cargo.

* * *

Core sighed deeply. He had just gotten the report from the Waygate. They were gone. He tightly shut his eyes and directed his face to the skies; they had tried their best, the reinforcements hadn't reached them in time to retake the Twins and the others. The fight had been great in size, but there were thankfully few casualties on heir side; the Aingells had been poorly equipped, with only swords and no ranged weapons. Most had been brought down, but some, including their commander, had escaped through the Waygate.

Behind him the brothers' house continued to shudder and emit unearthly noises as the supernatural seals slowly rotted away with the forced absence of their blue-furred maker and caretaker. The exorcists had arrived, and were already trying to strengthen the weakening house with a multitude of incantations and blessings of all kinds from all known religions of the Primal Plane, and more were on their way. It wouldn't last, he knew, but it was the best they could do.

He walked about the streets they had closed off, thinking. They had evacuated most of the Sunny Wing district and were now setting up roadblocks to prevent anyone from entering. The noon sky had darkened over the house, an early sign of what was to come, black and purple clouds hanging over the mansion in tight formation, spreading shadow over the immediate area. He sighed again; he really had hoped things wouldn't have gotten this bad. Contacting the Institute again, he began to prepare a special Team of Operatives for the recapture of the Twins and whoever else that may have been taken with them. They had to act quickly; things were only going to escalate, both here and in the Upper Plane, to nothing but disaster.

* * *

**TBC! Creepy, no? And action is good! When there is no funny, there will be action!**


	8. Angels and troublemakers pt3

**DISCLAIMERS: Sonic and his animated throw-rugs are copyrighted to the Sonic Team and Yuji Naka.**

**BUT: The General, the other voice, and that other voice are mine, along with the cracker, and the sound effects, and the Institutionaries.**

* * *

CHAPTER 8: ANGELS AND TROUBLEMAKERS part 3

The sensation was one he would never forget, and had never forgotten, for that matter. Shadow was the only member of the party, save also for Sonic, who wasn't screaming at the top of his lungs as they were pulled through the vortex that would take them to the Upper Plane of Nervanna. Being pulled through an inter-dimensional portal the size of the Waygate wasn't exactly something he would suggest the rest of humanity attempt to experience. Side effects of the ride included nausea, twisting of the inner bowels in protest, the wax being forced out of your ears and temporary deafness from the screeching of your fellow riders.

As soon as it had begun, the joyride ended. The Waygate spat them out into the unarmed Neutral Zone that rested in-between the several warring nations. The General didn't stop in his trek, pushing himself forward at impractical speeds he streaked through the pristine skies. The others had finally stopped screaming. Shadow peered critically about their new surroundings as they were carted to an unknown destination, taking careful note of the major landmarks of the land, and taking special care to memorise the location of the fabled machine, The Deliverer, and the great mountain peak it sat upon, Mount Epoch. Cruel thoughts orbiting about his brain he relaxed and grinned a toothy grin, watching as they flew over the first signs of civilisation.

The General slowed his flight as he soared over the not-quite-industrialised city. Nervanna was more or less locked, thanks to continuous war, in an Age where people were still only just discovering steam power. The nations refused to share their resources with each other, resources they all needed at once for any form of advancement, thus keeping the entire Plane in a semi-Medieval state. And so the multiple sides 'borrowed' the weapons of the other two Planes their land was forever linked to, not bothering with any resources, wanting only instant results. Towards the centre of the congealed mass of shingled buildings, the General began his descent, heading for a very tall and important-looking building that speared into the sky with several clock towers and bells. Flying low, angling straight for an open window, released his hold on the cage. The giant animals screamed as they shot through the window, bouncing twice before hitting a wall.

As the prison stilled it expanded, growing to encase the entirety of the new space, allowing the cartoon heroes semi-free roam over their new territory. The General was nowhere to be seen. Knuckles pushed himself painfully from the floor, feeling like a month-over-expired bag of all-natural fertiliser. "Ug… Someone make the world stop hurting," he whined.

Shadow sat on the floor, dusting his arms. "Humph. Not very host-like of them, to dump us here without even an 'enjoy your stay'."

"Fliggum shlorp-reg!" shouted Sonic, wrapped in his filthy quilt.

"That's true. They are our captors. I guess we're their prize prisoners." He got up from the dusty floor, examining his new surroundings. "Not very classy, I must say," he commented casually, running a finger over the sparse furniture to test the build-up of dust.

Polly was already running about, pecking at the scurrying spiders that tried feverishly to get out of the way. Tails was laying on the floor, staring at the ceiling.

"Where are we?" asked the echidna, shuffling about.

"Shhh!" admonished Shadow, waving an arm at him. He had his ear pressed to the floor, trying to listen to something going on beneath them. Getting frustrated with his bad reception, he motioned to Knuckles. "Get me a glass," he ordered.

Too tired to argue the echidna complied, grabbing a dust-coated water glass from an old china cabinet. The hedgehog took it and placed it under his ear as if it were a stethoscope. He continued to listen, making a face as he tuned into whatever conversation was taking place below them.

"The capture was successful," said one voice, instantly recognisable as the General's.

"Good," came a new voice, higher, younger, but full of command. "They are above us?"

"Yes, sir," said the General. "We have the two Hedgelings, as ordered, but there were others with them. Possibly fellow conspirators; we captured them as well."

"Others?" questioned the younger voice.

"The Hedgeling race is extinct," stated a new voice, old, the kind that frequented libraries and astronomy domes. "How could there be 'others'?"

"They aren't of the same race," replied the General irritably. "Though they are similar. All are giant vermin, that's all."

The scholarly voice scoffed.

"What is the statis of the Twins?" asked the young commander.

"The Shaman is carrying, sir. The other is not," replied the General.

"Good. What of the other captives?"

"Infected, I would assume."

"Then leave them. Let them wither away, we have no use for them anyway," said the commander dismissively.

Shadow continued to listen closely. He recognised the younger voice, but couldn't place it.

"But, sir, is this wise?" questioned the General, a hint of unease in his voice. "Those beasts have power we could use to gain favour in the war, that is plain. But is this necessary?"

There was a loud 'thud' as something heavy was thrown against wall. "_Everything_ is necessary in war, General," hissed the commanding voice dangerously. "Even spreading a plague. We will win this war, and put the Lastornnes in their place. We will take dominion of their resources, and the rest of the nations will come flocking to us for aid. We will be the first to advance. Do you not want this silly conflict to end, General? Or are you going soft on me?"

"N-no, sir!" came the General's voice, far from where it had been before. "I was questioning the morality of this strategy, sir. The collateral damage to the Lastornnes nation-"

"It does not matter!" snapped the commander, who was apparently the ruler of whatever nation they were on, Shadow guessed. "They are but mindless peasants! The loss will hinder the Lastornnes and keep them from prolonging their operations against us!"

"But, sir! The sickness will spread, will it not?"

"The General has a point, Lord," put in the aged scholar. "The winds will carry the pestilence back to us, surely."

"We'll contain it," stated the Lord irritably. "We'll surround their borders with the same shield used to contain the Twins, trapping them, and the whole of the Lastornnes population. Their nation will be swept clean of their filth."

Shadow pulled himself from the floor, he didn't need to hear any more. He wrung the glass in his hands, scowling at the floor. _So they intend to use us as weapons, do they? _Nasty thoughts began to circle his dark brain en-masse, slowly replacing his scowl with an equally evil grin.

Knuckles was wandering about the room, finding it odd that everything was flowing like a 1960's lava-lamp before his eyes. He felt awful. Steadying himself on a wall he looked at his hands, finding ugly blotches spaced about his arms. "Wha…?"

Sonic sneezed in the background, tearing Shadow's thoughts back to the present. He peered about, thinking of a plan of escape. He found the little school bag he had brought with them and carried at around as he thought, testing the walls for any weakness in the shield.

The red echidna was totally blown away by the discolorations forming on his skin. Poking at one he found that some were swelling and beginning to itch. "Did I get bitten by something?" he wondered aloud. Looking over the shifting floor he saw, with some difficulty, that Tails was similarly suffering, already scratching the ugly welts under his fur. Polly was under attack as well, stopping in its hunt for spiders to scratch beneath its feathers before pecking about again. "What kinda mite has a bite like this?" the echidna slurred. Not sure of any better alternative, he wobbled over to Shadow, tapping his shoulder. "Hey, Shadow," he said.

Shadow was still engrossed in his task. "Hmm? What?" he asked, not turning around.

"I think I've been bitten by something… I was wondering if you would know what kind of bug gives bites like these," he wheezed, swaying while he stood.

"A bug bite?" Shadow turned from the wall. "What kind of-AUG!" He jumped at what he saw.

"I think Tails and Polly got bit too," continued Knuckles sluggishly.

Shadow had a hand over his mouth in shock. A small sneeze from a bundle in the middle of the room reminded him of the predicament they were in. He watched helplessly as the echidna stared at his gloved hands. "Knuckles…" he said carefully.

The redhead looked up, watching Shadow melt and reform in his infected vision.

"I'm afraid that you weren't bitten by a bug," he said slowly. He had forgotten. They had all left the house, and the sickness coursing through his brother's system was free to flow about the confines of the shield.

"Oh?" replied Knuckles, slightly confused. "I'm sick?"

"Uh… yes… You, and the others, are very sick."

"How come you're not sick?" he blubbered questioningly.

"Aauumm… Because," he answered lamely.

"Oh. What do we have?"

Shadow thought about the answer he was about to give. "Well… you have the next Plague." _Best not to sugar it up_, he thought.

"Plague…?" repeated Knuckles. His bloodshot eyes widened as realisation dawned on him.

"Yes…" he confirmed. "Congratulations! You're the first to succumb to the yet-unnamed-Plague! The hostess will show you the way out!" He quickly scuttled away to the far wall as the echidna began to flex his fists.

"I… have… the _Plague_?" he clarified to himself slowly.

Sonic sneezed. Tails scratched. Polly hunted between itching.

"Um… yes. Let's not start a panic, shall we? There's no point in screaming about it," sweated Shadow from the other side of the room.

"I'm going to…" the words caught in the echidna's throat.

"Die?" finished Shadow. "Probably. But let's not get hysterical!" he added quickly as Knuckles turned slowly to face him.

"'Not get _hysterical_'?" he repeated in a low voice, getting angry. "I think I have every right to get hysterical. I have some freak illness that's going to kill me! It itches! It hurts! I got it from my frigging _landlord! _I'm going to turn into some form of disease-carrying zombie! How can I not get hysterical?" He waved his arms wildly as he spoke, looking like a disturbed owl.

"Now, now," said Shadow worriedly. "This would not have happened if-"

"This would not have happened if you and your miserable brother weren't so… so… AAG! I don't know what you two are! What the hell have you two been doing that makes you wanted weapons of mass destruction!"

"Ah… That's a trade secret," he improvised, grinning stupidly. "Let's just say you don't want to know."

"You…"

"Flork!" shouted Sonic suddenly, standing up in his blanket, effectively silencing everyone else. "Worple! Diggy rip!" he exclaimed, flailing his right arm. He instantly began to run around in a circle about the dusty table, yelling.

Knuckles began to chase after him. "This is all your fault!" he screamed, trying to catch him.

Shadow watched as the two did endless laps around the table.

"I'M GONNA DIE AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!" shrieked the echidna madly.

"GLOR!" retorted Sonic to no-one in particular, still waving his one arm, clutching at his blanket with the other.

Seeing that he was no longer in danger of being mauled by the angry insect-eater, Shadow restarted his search for a possible tear in the make of the shield.

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"

"WINGLOP FWIBBLE!"

The dark hedgehog felt over the walls with his hands. He came to the chimney. He felt an imbalance in the strength of the shield. He ran his hand up and down the construction. Here. They could try to get free here. The mouth of the chimney was below them. They would have to make a new one themselves. He turned and called out to the enraged echidna. "Knuckles!"

The redhead didn't answer.

With an exasperated sigh he called again, only with a particular amount of force he reserved for moments similar to this one, much like earlier when they were being chased in a giant hamster ball. "Knuckles! Get over here!"

The unhappy echidna instantly stopped in his tracks. His legs pulled him from the invisible racetrack that ran around the misused table and stopped before the red and black hedgehog obediently.

"Good boy," he said with a toothy grin.

Knuckles gave him a cold look. "How are you doing that?" he asked irritably. "That's the second time you've done that today. What is it?"

"Oh!" he said, genuinely surprised. "I didn't think you'd notice the first time. You're more sensitive than I thought."

"How do you do that?" he asked again.

"Oh, I couldn't tell you that. It's just a useful tool, let's put it that way."

"It doesn't work on Sonic does it?" he asked in a low voice, anger still pounding through his veins.

"Ah, no. It doesn't. But that doesn't matter. What does matter is that I now have your attention."

"What?"

"I need you," he backed away from the collection of bricks, "to make a hole in this chimney neck here."

"Why?"

"So that we may escape."

The red echidna eyed him through his mutilated vision.

"Do it and we can get our revenge," stated the hedgehog.

"I'm not the vengeful type, Shadow," he replied heatedly.

"Oh?" he eyed him critically. "Then what was that?"

"What?"

"You chasing my defenceless sibling around a dusty piece of furniture?"

"He's not defenceless! And he deserved it! So there!"

"Oh, I'll be sure to tell him that once he comes out of all this…"

Knuckles went white. "No! Don't do that! W-where do you want the hole?"

Shadow grinned in satisfaction. He could be a real stinker when he wanted to. "Here, please," he said, pointing and getting out of the demolition path.

The echidna stepped up and felt the wall, testing it. He bunched his right fist tightly and with a huff slammed it against the old brickwork, shattering the stone blocks and exposing a relatively large cavity leading to the roof.

Shadow peered about the hole. He whistled in satisfaction. "Very good. Now we can get out of this dusty, musty hell-hole." He pulled his head out from the cavern and whistled again. "Come over here, everyone!" he called.

Groaning and looking sick they all obeyed without persuasion.

Shadow gripped the little red pack on his shoulder. "Okay, everyone. We're going to take a little field-trip."

Tails instantly brightened at the words 'field-trip'. "Are we going to the zoo?" he asked.

"Maybe, if you're good," replied Shadow sweetly. "We're going to go up this chimney first, and then plan our trek from there, understand?" The hairy, and feathered, collective nodded. "Good. I'll go first. Everyone else follow after me." Without further explanation he dived into the chimney, grasping the sides of the sooty brickwork and shimmying upwards.

After a few feet he was stopped by the invisible barrier of their prison shield. Bracing himself with his feet he prodded the shimmering barrier with a finger. The others stopped beneath him, wondering at the hold up. Shadow felt the shield carefully, sensing it weaken and grow in strength erratically. He concentrated on a single thought and pressed his hand against the fluctuating wall. The prismatic film began to burn at his touch, receding slowly. He continued to concentrate, the effort sapping him of all his strength. At last he produced a hole large enough for him and the others to fit through. He quickly climbed through it, the hole shrinking slowly. "Quickly now! Climb through it before it closes!" he ordered. The rest of the giant animals scrambled up the length of the chimney at his command, the last only just clearing the diminishing tear in their prison.

Reaching the top at long last they spilled out of the chimney onto the roof, covered in thick layers of soot.

Shadow let the others catch their breaths, perching on the top of the shingled roof. He looked out to the horizon, seeing that the sun was setting rapidly. "Hmm, we've been in there longer than I thought." He clung to the bag. "They'll probably discover our lack of presence soon enough," he added to himself.

Within moments a crisp bugle call tore through the chill air.

"Speak of the Devil," the dark hedgehog muttered. "Time to make a quick getaway." The sun had nearly set completely. He shuffled over to the others. "Oh Polly!" he called.

The giant bird came to his side obediently, hoping for an offering of crackers.

"You are going to do the rest of us a huge favour!" he said cheerily, rummaging through the bag he had towed with them all this way. Knuckles watched, and nearly lost what little remained in his stomach as Shadow pulled the fake skin out from the bag.

Polly peered at the false flesh with a sharp eye, twittering softly.

"Arms out, Polly!" Shadow began to fit the decaying skin about the bird. Polly stood in place quietly as its master worked.

"Polly wants a cracker!" shouted Polly.

Finished, the black hedgehog pulled the disguised Polly to where his brother was sitting, the sound of hoofs beating on cobble stones materialising from the distance. Shadow poked his wasted brother in the shoulder. "Oh sibling, I need something," he crowed.

"Fffff…" said Sonic, staring out into the distance.

"Come now, brother I'm sure you can focus for a few moments, hmm?" he said crossly, pulling a cracker from his bag.

Polly tried to steal the crumbly treat. "Polly wants a cracker!" it shrieked.

"Sush, Polly!" scolded Shadow. "Sibling," he said, "I need you to animate this biscuit."

Sonic's diseased vision was trained on his fraternal twin. "FFFffff…" he said again, shaking like a wired Chihuahua.

"Oh, come on!" urged Shadow.

The blue hog lifted a shaking finger to point at the cracker. The flakey snack item combusted violently, exploding in the others grasp.

Shadow cursed and shook his hand, trying to cool his burnt fingers. "That was uncalled for!" he shouted. The sound of hoofs was getting louder. He pulled out a new cracker, restraining the bird as he held it out before his brother "Try again!" he demanded, sweat dripping down his brow. They had come too far to be recaptured. "Please, sibling!" he pleaded, "we need to get away! Do this right and we'll be well on our way to spreading chaos, I promise!"

The blue hedgehog's vision seemed to clear at this. He lifted a shaking finger again, squinting in concentration through a miasma of sickness and delirium.

Knuckles had also heard it. He tried to force himself from the ground, his brain hard-wired to stopping whatever plan Shadow was trying to get rolling.

Not fast enough.

A bolt of green light arched from Sonic's finger to the cracker, causing it to jump out of Shadow's grasp to land on the roof. The cracker stood up under its own power, 'looking' up at Shadow.

The black hedgehog grinned. "Run," he commanded it. Instantly the crumbly treat sped away, leaping from the roof to land on the cobbled road. The cracker continued to speed away, waddling at the speed of sound.

Polly was going mad in Shadow's grasp, trying to chase after it. Shadow held the bird steady in his grasp, watching the approaching guardsmen close in on them from all directions. With another toothy grin he released the disguised bird.

Polly Perkins shot from the roof like a thing possessed, barrelling after the retreating cracker. The mounted guard instantly regrouped and began to case after the bird. "Capture the Shaman!" they shouted. Shadow stepped back from the edge of the roof as the guard rode after the preoccupied, cos-playing bird, immensely pleased his plan was working thus far.

He silently urged everyone else to their feet, leading them across the rooftops as the sun squatted feebly on the horizon, the last rays of light diminishing from sight slowly.

The black hedgehog ushered the rest of the giant mammals quickly towards the Neutral Zone.

* * *

The Operatives had been dispatched. They would find the Brothers and whoever else had been taken with them, and bring them back to the Primal Plane under containment, if need be.

The house was rotting visibly now, its once pristine surface dark and coated in sludge. They had luckily been able to keep the spirits locked within the walls, though for how much longer he could not say. The lawn was pitching and rolling feverishly, moans escaping from the earth. Innumerable exorcists and holy men of all religions and faiths had gathered about the property, trying to keep the angry apparitions from spilling out into the yard. An even greater number of I.S.I.D. Hunters stood at attention all about the neighbourhood, each armed with ghost-trapping equipment.

He hoped it would be enough. Core scanned over the accumulation of human life. He felt fear from them, uncertainty. No-one knew how many ghosts and phantasms had been locked away inside the mansion, they could only guess. Each trap the men carried could only carry so many.

Though he was not a man of faith, the Director prayed.

* * *

**TBC! This is far from over! Stay tuned, folks!**


	9. Angels and troublemakers pt4

**DISCLAIMERS: Sonic and his cotton-headed companions all belong to the Sonic Team and Yuji Naka.**

**BUT: The cavalry, the beast, the doomed cracker, the speck on the ground, and the general landscape are mine.**

**

* * *

**

CHAPTER 9: ANGELS AND TROUBLEMAKERS part 4

They had just left the city limits. Shadow tugged his hallucinating sibling through the surrounding trees as the quartet dashed for freedom. Knuckles' conscience was waging war on his delirious brain. "What about Polly?" he asked from the rear.

"She'll be fine!" replied Shadow from the front.

Unbeknownst to them, the Sonic-dressed Polly was still charging after the cracker, ploughing through the ranks of guards as it went, causing more confusion than a mouse in a cheese shop.

The four giant mammals sped into the Neutral Zone, stopping amongst the trees for a breath. As the others huffed Shadow peered through the foliage to gaze upwards, grinning upon seeing Mount Epoch rising not too far ahead of them. After a few minutes of rest he forced the rest back to their feet and continued their trek to the mountain's base.

The pressure didn't stop there. The dark hedgehog ushered the rest up the mountainside relentlessly, using Tails' ability to fly to speed up the process. Within a few hours they stood at the top, gazing into the monstrous cavern that held the inner workings of The Deliverer. The outer portion of the massive machine orbited the peak outside, almost giving the earthly formation the look of an ancient planetarium in desperate need of revamping. The others panting madly behind him, Shadow advanced into the depths of the cavern, rubbing his hands together. He gazed up at the inner workings of the great machine, oh, the things he could do… But that wasn't what they were here for, no. There wouldn't be enough time for the machine once they were through with what they had come to do… But if they were lucky… "Winglor!" came a shout from the entrance.

Shadow turned to face his brother. "I'm going to keep that promise I made you, sibling, don't you worry!"

His diseased twin hauled himself from the floor and followed after him. Knuckles dragged himself across the rocky ground, still hoping he could put this madness to an end before it started. Tails rolled over the dirty floor, trundling along after the two hedgehogs.

They reached their true destination in moments, standing in an immense cave housing a pool of pristine water. Shadow gave a toothy grin, this was the source of all of Nervanna's drinking water. His brother swayed sickly beside him, just beginning to let out a sneeze. With a whip of his arm Shadow clamped a hand over the other's nose and face, clogging the sneeze. Sonic struggled madly in his brother's grasp, batting at his hands feebly. The dark hedgehog remained undeterred as he kept his hold over his sibling.

Knuckles finally reached the glittering cave, wondering if his sight was playing tricks on him as he gazed at the quarrelling twins. Was Sonic… turning _green?_ He squinted and rubbed his eyes in disbelief. Indeed, the blue hedgehog was turning a nasty shade of green as his brother kept his hand clamped over his face, nearly glowing with a nuclear light. He had lost his blanket.

Tails rolled into him absently.

Satisfied with his sibling's change in hue Shadow release him. Sonic fell to the dark floor with a flop, the sneeze gone, but replaced with something much worse. A horrible gurgling sound emanated from his stomach as he laid on the ground, causing him to sit up abruptly. Looking around feverishly through his mounting delirium, the hedgehog spotted the clean waters of the cave. His stomach twisting madly he crawled to the pool's edge, and promptly hurled into it.

The red echidna watched in horror at what was unfolding before him. He gagged and looked away as his co-star continued to vomit a putrid sludge into the clear waters, trying to keep is own lunch where it belonged as the smell hit him. "What -gack- are you doing!" he gagged.

"Oh, just doing our job," stated the black and red hedgehog. "And getting our revenge in the process!" He sighed wistfully. "Ahh… It's so heartening…"

"No it's not!" shouted the echidna, crawling to the pool weakly. "That's probably their drinking water! You'll contaminate it!"

"I know. That's why we're here."

The waters were swiftly turning a yellowed shade of green.

"This is the source of all of Nervanna's drinking water," confirmed Shadow, spreading his arms wide in emphasis. "And by tomorrow evening, a third of all of this Plane's waterways will be flowing with force of the Plague!" he announced cheerily.

"You… you're poisoning the entire population? What for?" cried Knuckles.

"Because it's our job. And also because we feel like it."

"That's a terrible excuse, and you know it," retorted the echidna.

"Well, they were asking for it," he defended. "If they hadn't kidnapped us in the first place, then none of this would have happened. It's as simple as that."

"Make Sonic stop!" he yelled.

"Oh, shush! Those idiots back there wanted to 'cleanse' the nation so that's what we're doing! They're getting their just desserts!"

"This isn't justice, if that's what you're thinking, this is putting thousands of innocent people on Death Row!"

"Please, as if it would make any difference! Look around you, Knuckles! You see that machine?" he asked, pointing at an exposed portion of The Deliverer.

"Don't change the subject!"

"DO YOU SEE IT?" he asked again, forcefully.

"What about it?" he consented.

"That machine recycles souls. Constantly. Day in. Day out. Nervanna's population never truly changes. All those 'innocent people' were soldiers at some point in their existence, dealing death under the order of pompous fools!"

Knuckles was silent. "What are you getting at?"

"We're here to change the tides. This Plague, I have realised, will surely cause that machine to overload and crash."

"But, then… the souls won't be returned, right?"

"That is correct."

"They'll remain dead…"

"Yes."

He looked at him angrily. "HOW IS THIS A GOOD THING?" he demanded.

Shadow rolled his eyes. "Just stop and think for a moment. With The Deliverer broken the nations will have to stop fighting, yes?"

"So? Your point being? They'll stop because there'll be no-one left to conscript!"

Shadow sighed in exasperation. "That's only _half_ the reason, Knuckles. They will have to repair it. And in order to do that, they will have to _co-operate_. See where I'm going with this?"

Knuckles squinted at him suspiciously.

"They will have to put their differences aside. They will have to share. As cruel as it may seem, Knuckles, this may just be the only way to end the constant strife that infects this pitiful Plane!"

The echidna was silent.

The waters were bubbling putridly.

"I still don't think it's right," the redhead said simply.

"That's perfectly natural," replied Shadow, walking away.

"But why are _you_ doing this?" he stressed.

Shadow stopped and looked at him over his shoulder.

"Why not let nature take care of it?" he insisted.

Shadow grinned. "Because," he said, "that's not how chaos works."

He laid on the ground quietly. Sonic had finally finished puking a river and was now getting back onto his feet, his normal colour restored, as well as something else. "Bah! That was more disgusting than the last time!"

Shadow waltzed up to his angry sibling casually. "Feeling better I see."

"You dumb pile of phlegm!" retorted Sonic. "Why did you bring me here?"

"A little voice in my head told me to," he replied cheerily.

The blue hog whirled on him, all traces of sickness gone. "You stupid termite, I should have you put away!"

"Ooh, but then your life wouldn't be as eventful, now would it?" jeered Shadow.

"I hate you with every fibre of my being."

Knuckles let his head fall to the floor in exhaustion. Things were back to normal.

Sonic, huffing like a mad person, stalked to the exit, grabbing the echidna and the two-tailed fox as he went. "Come on, you lumps of trash. We're leaving. No ifs, ands, or buts!"

The echidna allowed himself to be dragged indignantly across the floor as he shook his head at the familiar line. Tails cheering beside him.

Shadow followed behind, grinning triumphantly.

Reaching the entrance of the cave, Sonic dropped his cargo unceremoniously to the ground. Tails whined. "Aww, is the ride over? I wanna go again!"

"Can it, twit!"

"Don't call him names!" scolded Shadow.

"I'll call him whatever I like!"

Knuckles gurgled from the floor, darkness sweeping in.

"What's the matter with you?" demanded Sonic.

"You forget what you just experienced, sibling," put in his twin.

"What? Oh!" The blue hedgehog grabbed the echidna by the arm and hefted him from the ground. Holding him up he waved his hand over him, making an odd whistling noise. He let him drop to the ground and repeated the procedure on the squealing Tails. "There," he said, letting the fox drop as well. "Now get up!"

Knuckles hefted himself from the ground. He was surprised to find that his strength had returned, and the ugly blotches had disappeared. "I'm… cured?" he asked hesitantly.

"What? You can't tell?"

"You're such a snob!" he shouted suddenly.

"Maybe, but it's a lot better than what you are, you pansy!"

"I should deck you!"

"Yeah? Try that and I'll skin you alive, bug-boy!"

"WEEEE!" squealed Tails.

Shadow took hold of his brother's arm as he continued to argue with the distraught echidna, leading the lot of them down the mountainside.

The bickering had escalated to include the three of them by the time they reached the bottom of Mount Epoch, where they had started their climb.

Their argument came to a close, however, when a tiny cracker came scuttling by at a breakneck speed. A monstrous being shot from the dark foliage and landed on the crumbly treat, instantly gobbling it up. "Squawk! Polly wants a cracker!" it shrieked.

"Aug… not the bird…" began Sonic.

Polly Perkins shook itself and waddled over to the four giant animals.

Sonic froze at the bird's wear. "What is this?" he demanded, tearing the decaying bag of false skin from Polly's feathers. "This is mine!" he said. He pinned his brother with an icy glare.

Shadow held up his hands placidly. "Now now. I made that for a reason."

"Oh yeah? What reason, pray tell, was that?" he questioned angrily, not at all happy at finding somebody else wearing his skin, no matter how fake it was.

Before Shadow could answer his temperamental twin, the sound of hoofs came thundering to meet their ears, signifying that Polly hadn't lost its pursuers.

A troupe of horsemen galloped into the tiny clearing the giant animals had gathered in, surrounding them on all sides save the cliffs. "Surrender now, Shaman!" shouted one of the riders importantly.

"Who are these clowns?" asked Sonic.

"The lesser employees of our captors," explained Shadow.

"Come quietly and none of your followers gets hurt, Shaman!" said the lead rider to Sonic.

Sonic turned to face him. "Look, you obnoxious board of bolts, I'm trying to hold a conversation with my wretched sibling, do you mind?"

The rider blinked from behind his helmet. "S-surrender!" he said again, with a little less confidence.

"Buzz off, twit, you're hogging my air!"

"You will… um… come with us to speak with the master of this Nation!" announced the knight.

"You sound an awful lot like someone else I've met," huffed the hedgehog.

"Surrender!" repeated the knight.

"Bite me, you stupid git! Now get lost!"

The leader sputtered in his helmet. "We will take you by force!"

"Are your ears clogged? I said get lost, or I'll lose you for you!" Sonic shouted, waving his arms haphazardly.

The others remained silent. Best to let Sonic handle problems like these.

The armoured man remained foolishly undeterred. "I'm warning you, Shaman, to surrender or-"

"Or what, you blithering pile of flea-dung? You'll prod me to death with your pointy sticks?"

The lesser knights looked at their swords questioningly. The poor leader struggled to keep the morale of his cavalry aloft. "We will not retreat until you come with us!" he tried.

"Oh? 'Retreat', eh?"

The knights began to shift in their saddles hesitantly as the look in the blue-furred animal's eyes changed.

"If it's an excuse to retreat you want, than it's an excuse to retreat you'll get!"

The leader realised that his choice of words was very poor indeed.

Sonic put his hands together, calling up a vicious wind. A bright portal opened at his feet, spilling light into the dark clearing. A roar erupted from the shimmering portal and a great, red, scaly being shot from the tear in reality. The knights' horses whinnied in panic as the giant, hoof-footed terror stood before the diminutive hedgehog, drooling like a broken faucet. The dog-faced thing roared again, causing the silver cavalry to shriek and dash away into the trees. With a bellow the red being barrelled after them, chasing after the frightened horses and their screaming riders.

Sonic dusted his hands. "Well, that takes care of that," he said.

Knuckles was appalled. Tails had begun to pick his nose. Sonic grabbed the two of them and hauled them towards the general direction of the Waygate.

"You-you're just going to let that thing pick them off?" cried the echidna incredulously.

"Of course I am, you nit!" retorted Sonic.

"You're so cruel!"

"That's what I'm here for!"

"Don't worry, Knuckles," assured Shadow from behind, curing Polly of its blotchy illness as he went. "The knights will be fine. Gullargs only chase knights because they're wearing silver."

"What does that mean?" questioned the echidna.

"They hate that colour."

Knuckles blinked stupidly as he was towed along at an indignant pace.

They reached the Waygate in moments, stepping through without a second's hesitation. As they shot through the interPlane speedway, the quintet passed a group of heavily armed Operatives, who had the most surprised look on their faces as they rocketed by.

Even as they exited the portal they didn't stop to rest. The two hedgehogs joined hands the moment they touched down on solid earth, dropping them all into another hellish ride home before anybody stationed at the portal could do anything about their arrival.

They plummeted down the hellish corridor at immeasurable speeds, shooting straight for home.

* * *

The exorcists were losing ground. The angry spirits threatened to break free of the main constraints of the house. The Director looked about frantically as he felt a new presence welling up on the sidewalk. There was a blinding flash, and the five giant animals stood before him. Core was speechless. His walkie-talkie buzzed loudly. "The Twins have returned!" yelled the static-coated voice.

Sonic arched an eyebrow at him and turned to face his haunted home. "All of you! Get off my lawn!" he shouted at the exorcists. He stalked up the sidewalk to his property.

Shadow gave Core a shrug. "Yes. We're back," he said. "And we're clear of the Plague, all of us, just so you know. So no need to worry."

Sonic's house was making an awful lot of noise. The blue hedgehog stood before the decaying house, otherworldly winds whipping about him. Moans and shrieks of the undead assaulted his ears as the throng of exorcists poured from his rolling lawn. He glared at the apparitions flowing about the mansion, not in the least bit fazed as they reach out for him collectively, the crowd of spirits forming a single pair of ghastly hands. He stared them all down. "Shut up and go to bed," he said crossly.

In a split second the lawn stilled, the voices vanished, the paint returned to the house and the foreboding clouds dissipated into the night air. With a huff Sonic let himself in, all traces of damage gone from his abode, even the monstrous hole left from the earlier assault was gone. The horde of Institutionaries gawped in silence as the rest of the giant animals followed suit.

* * *

**TBC! This ain't over yet! There are still some loose-ends (remember chapter four?) to take care of along with plenty of hilarity and breakfast mayhem!**


	10. Weapons of an Iron Maiden

**DISCLAIMERS: Sonic and his lowly copies all belong to the Sonic Team and Yuji Naka.**

**BUT: The bogeyman, Sheryl and the slime are mine.**

**Yet another late update. I'm sorry! Same excuse as last time. But, once again, all you patient and faithful people out there get two chapters this week, plus more general updates! Select chapters have been corrected in whatever wrong-ness I have managed to corner thus far (again). Most are fairly small (misspellings and whatnot), but they plague me to no end until I fix them, so there. Test your reading wit and try to find them! Just joking.**

* * *

CHAPTER 10: WEAPONS OF AN IRON MAIDEN

And so ended their night. So exhausted were the mini heroes they collapsed in the living room, lost to sleep and dreams as quick as a wink.

Monday rolled along swiftly, shining brightly through the windows.

The three heroes and their mutated bird rose from their slumber stiffly, Tails, as always, getting up first. "Cereal! Cereal cereal cereal!" he chanted loudly.

"Nnggh. Shut up, freak," groaned Sonic in response, sliding from his armchair drowsily.

"CEREAL!"

"NNAAGGHH! ALRIGHT! I'LL GET YOU YOUR CEREAL!"

"Yay!"

The angry hog peeled himself from the floor and stalked over to the kitchen, Tails skipping in circles around him happily as he went.

The others rolled in their respectful 'beds' sleepily, Shadow rolling too far and falling to the ground loudly.

Finally reaching the kitchen counter the blue hedgehog grabbed Tails' Monday cereal bowl, crawling with Muppets, and swiftly dumped a load of 'Super Blasto-Rocket-Bits', which were several times more sugared than the regular brand, into it. Drowning the wheat shreds in milk he put the bowl onto the table and sat Tails in his chair. With the fox whooping in delight he ambled back to the counter to fix himself something. At a slight loss of what to have, however, he just stood there, blinking blearily into space. The other two sentient beings came into the kitchen shortly afterwards, leaving Polly to peck at the weave in the carpets once more.

Knuckles looked around sleepily. "Hey… wasn't our kitchen covered in snot earlier?" he yawned, scratching his head absently.

Indeed, the house had become miraculously spick-and-span.

"Maybe," said Sonic dismissively.

Shrugging, the echidna sat down at the table, yawning immensely.

Tails inhaled his breakfast like an overpowered vacuum cleaner, hardly dirtying his spoon. He instantly capered off to watch television, as school had ended for the summer holidays. Shadow shambled over to the answering machine to check for any messages. Thankfully, Eebon hadn't re-conscripted them for another day of acting. Smiling slightly he sat down at the table as well.

"Polly wants a cracker!" exploded the bird from the living room.

Shadow let his head drop heavily.

"Get off your ass, bro, that pest's your responsibility," sneered Sonic from the counter, now engaged in making a bowl of vile-looking oatmeal.

Shadow left the table reluctantly, grabbing a plastic-wrapped tower of crackers he stalked to the living room, where Polly Perkins waited.

Sonic sniggered as he left, putting some water on to boil. Knuckles yawned again. "Say, what do we have for toast spread?" he asked.

"That depends," replied Sonic. "That cinnamon ant-spread of yours is all out."

"Huh? I just bought it, though. How can it be out?"

"Tails decided to feed it to the ants in the backyard."

"Gahg." He leaned on the table, resting his head on his elbow. "Do we have any peanut butter?"

"Fresh out. But we do have jam."

"Sounds like we need to go for a little grocery shopping," put in Shadow, returning from the living room.

"Heh. Not liking your pet any more, are you, brother?" sniggered Sonic.

Shadow put his hands on his hips. "Don't you start. Most of that is your fault, remember."

The kettle began to steam. Sonic removed it from the stove burner and poured its contents into his oatmeal. He snorted. "Feh. If you hadn't put that stupid bird in my room and cursed the cage, not to mention forget to feed it, then none of that would have happened. Polly would still be a 'miss' and you'd still be a happy, though lousy, owner."

Shadow huffed snobbishly at this, turning his head away.

Knuckles looked between the two of them. "Did you guys happen to think that maybe Polly wasn't a girl in the first place?" he asked.

The brothers were silent.

Finally, "huh. Then it's only _half_ my fault. Your stupidity is also to blame then, Shadow," said Sonic, stirring his breakfast until it was thick.

The dark hedgehog huffed again, not saying anything, still standing.

Sonic sat down with his bowl of ugly oatmeal, which smelled just as bad as it looked. Knuckles put a hand over his mouth and went to the counter to make some toast.

Shadow peered at his sibling critically. "It's not healthy to be eating that kind of stuff this early in the morning," he said.

"Shut up. You have no right to talk, you dumb donkey," retorted the other, undeterred as he took his first bite of the steaming mulch.

Huffing a third time Shadow also went over to the counter to make himself some breakfast.

The blue hog of the house continued to down his chosen breakfast meal as the others returned to do the same, Knuckles eating two slices of jam toast, and Shadow munching on a curious set of biscuits that looked as though they had fallen into a swamp ditch and moulded there. The trio ate in relative silence, with the _Atomic Betty_ theme song blasting out from the television speakers in the living room. Polly flapped his limbs manically as the two-tailed fox jumped up and down while singing along with the song.

Finished with their first meal of the day the three 'adults' went about doing whatever they pleased, since they had the entire day to themselves. Knuckles fetched the newspaper from the front step, and returned to the living room to lose himself in it. Shadow grabbed some knitting from a basket beside the couch, while his sibling lounged in his favourite armchair.

After a while Sonic sat up suddenly in his chair. "I need something to read," he announced.

"You want the 'Supernatural Pages'?" asked the echidna courtly, pulling out the specified section of the paper.

"No. I need something with a little more 'oomph' to it," he replied, getting up. He made his way to the upstairs at a leisurely pace, mulling over what book to dredge from his massive, private library.

The others passed their time in silence back downstairs.

The tranquility was shattered when an ear-shattering scream pierced the air, making everyone jump. Sonic came rushing back downstairs, instantly leaping onto his brother and wrapping both hands about his throat in fury, shaking him as he spoke. "_You BASTARD!_" he accused. "_You stole ALL of my books, you THIEVING WORM! I'LL HAVE YOUR HIDE!_" Sonic continued to throttle his twin, anger wafting from him in waves. Knuckles jumped from his seat, trying to dislodge the enraged animal from the neck of his sibling.

Shadow was struggling for air. At long last the echidna tore his landlord from the other's throat. The black hedgehog sat up hurriedly, gasping for breath.

Sonic shot from the ground and glared madly at the redhead. "YOU…"

"What -cough- what are you talking about?" butt-in Shadow, saving the echidna.

Sonic spun around. "You heard me!" he shouted, pointing. "You stole all of my books! My library is empty!"

"I didn't take any of your books!" he insisted, rubbing his throat.

"Then where are they! They cannot leave this house without my consent, let alone my room! You're the only other person who could possibly remove them, so speak up!"

Shadow gave his sibling a reproachful glare. "I don't have your books, Sonic. I don't know where they are."

"BULLOCKS!" he shouted. "You've been planning this, haven't you! You and that bogeyman of yours-"

"Bogeyman?" questioned Shadow, looking serious.

"That pile of sick under your bed!" clarified Sonic loudly, still raging. "That thing attacked me yesterday! It nearly dragged me under your bed!"

Shadow's expression didn't change. "You're sure?"

"Yes, you blithering idiot! I would find it rather hard to forget something that tried to drag me into your world of under-bed filth!"

Shadow sprang from his seat on the couch, looking very grave. He rocketed upstairs, his brother close on his heels. Knuckles, appointing himself as general peacekeeper, followed as well. Tails and Polly remained glued before the TV.

Reaching the top of the stairs, Shadow slowed his pace to a near crawl, moving in absolute silence. The sound of a distant wind emanated from down the hall towards the dark hedgehog's room. The three giant animals peered down the hallway cautiously, catching sight of a misty fog flowing out from under the bedroom door.

The door to the dark hedgehog's room had been closed. But it had long since been reopened by an unseen force, allowing the mist to escape through the tiny crack between the door and the frame. An unholy orange light followed the fog out to the hallway, unchanging in intensity.

Knuckles was awestruck. The two brothers now shared the same concerned, grave expressions.

"This… is not good," said Shadow softly, gaze nailed to the door of his bedroom.

"I concur on that," agreed Sonic just as softly, staring at the door as well.

As if sensing their presence, a terrible moan emitted from behind the door, unearthly and full of decay and anger. The door opened wider slightly, then slammed shut. The mist began to recede; the light followed suite.

Shadow dashed from where he stood to the door, yanking it open fiercely. The others rushed to his side. What greeted them was only his room, plain and untouched. The black hedgehog stepped in carefully, not letting the others enter until he had reached the bed. The three stood before the piece of furniture, which was still soaked in pinkish ooze. Kneeling, Shadow lifted the hanging blankets to peer beneath the bed.

The underside was bare.

Getting back up he motioned to the others to take a hold of the bed. With a suppressed grunt they heaved the furniture up from the ground. No sooner had they lifted the bed a deep, angry, hissing-roar sounded from beneath. With a strength well surpassing their own the bed was wrenched from the grasp of the Sega heroes and slammed back onto the ground. The three creatures fell back from the retaliation, their arms nearly yanked from their sockets.

As they laid on the floor a foul pink ooze, the same that had coated Shadow the morning before as well as his sheets, began to flow from under the bed. The three scrambled to get away from the advancing jell.

Not fast enough.

A skinless arm shot from under the slumber furniture, grabbing the red echidna by the legs with one large hand. Knuckles screamed in terror as the appendage began to drag him back to the underside of the bed. Shadow and Sonic dove to his rescue, grasping him by the arms.

"GOOD GOD, WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?" shrieked the echidna.

The brothers pulled against the unholy strength of the arm.

A glowing pair of white eyes materialised in the shadows beneath the blankets, red-rimmed and full of madness. The owner of both the eyes and the terrorising arm roared again, increasing its pull on the frightened echidna.

"AAAAGGGGHHHH! DON'T LET GO!" screamed Knuckles.

"Stop shouting!" yelled Shadow.

"Shut up and pull!" ordered Sonic.

The twins heaved and pulled against the arm with all their might, slowly dragging the echidna away from the bed.

Knuckles had tears in his eyes. He felt as though he was being ripped in two. He was in pain, and he was terrified. The monstrous hand refused to release him, its insane grip threatening to crush his legs together. Looking back fearfully he met the eyes of the beast that still lay hidden beneath the bed. Reflected in the white orbs he saw only madness, anger, and an obsession so great it left him feeling dwarfed and alone.

Sonic and Shadow continued to fight the monster's hold on their redheaded friend, the strain mounting against them rapidly.

"Brother," huffed Shadow, sweating profusely from the strain. "We need some help."

"Ug," replied Sonic, sweating just as much as his un-identical twin. "Until we find some, keep pulling."

The beast, fed-up with the resistance the three mammals were giving it, decided to retaliate against their efforts as the echidna was inched away from it. A fleshy tentacle of muscle and sinew exploded from beneath the bed, swinging dangerously over the twins' heads.

The two brothers fell back at the sudden attack, nearly loosing their grip on their friend. "WHOA!" cried Sonic. "What the hell do you have under that bed of yours, Shadow!"

Shadow ground his teeth. "I couldn't tell you, sibling. If I knew, then we wouldn't be fighting it, yes?"

"Grr!"

The new appendage whipped around for another go at the hedgehogs, nearly slamming into them bodily as they shifted to get out of the way. All the commotion was making the frightened echidna slide back closer to the bed. Despite their vigilance, the brothers' grip continued to loosen, allowing Knuckles to gradually slip away.

"Don't let me go!" cried knuckles helplessly, tears streaming from his eyes.

"We're trying!" retorted Sonic.

The skinless tentacle flew over their heads again, the monster controlling it groaning loudly.

Dodging the boneless appendage the brothers yanked on their friend bodily, finally wrenching him free of the beast's grasp. The trio falling back they scrambled for the door. The monster hidden beneath the bed roared in fury, swinging its tentacle angrily.

In his rush of retreat Shadow slipped in the growing pool of ooze, falling to the carpeted floor. The wind knocked out of him he laid there, trying to reclaim his breath. The murderous appendage swung around and slammed against the defenceless being mercilessly, knocking him unconscious.

"Shadow!" cried Sonic.

The skinless arm whipped back out from under the bed and seized the unmoving bundle of black and red fur, dragging it under into the shadows.

Sonic tried to dive to his brother's aid. The monster's tentacle batted him away, sending him sailing through the air. Knuckles tried to catch the hedgehog, sliding backwards from the force of the blow. The two animals coasted painfully back into the hallway. With a loud groan the beast shut the bedroom door behind them loudly, the orange light returning along with the mist.

"Nnnaaaaggghh! NO!" screamed the blue hedgehog, scrambling from the floor to the bedroom door. Grasping the door knob he rattled and shook it madly, the metal bulb refusing to budge. A growl sounded from beyond the slab of wood.

Knuckles got back to his feet and pulled the angry rodent from the door. "Stop, Sonic! There's nothing we can do!"

The other shook the echidna off forcefully. "Oh, yes there is," he said dangerously, glaring at the door.

"What?"

"You'll see. Come on." He stalked purposefully to his own room, motioning for the echidna to follow.

Knuckles followed obediently. "What are you going to do?" he asked as they reached the blue hedgehog's bedroom.

Sonic remained silent as he put a gloved hand on the door knob. He turned to the red-furred echidna suddenly. "Give me your word," he said.

"Huh?"

"That you won't repeat what you are about to see to _anyone_."

"W-why?"

"Do you want to help?"

"Yeah, but-"

"Then give me your word. Swear on it."

Knuckles was silent for a moment. He studied the other carefully, staring straight into the hedgehog's emerald eyes. Staring back at him was something he had never seen before in the creature; was it… genuine concern? "I swear," he said at last.

Sonic turned away and opened the door to his room, admitting the other inside with a wave of his hand.

The echidna swore that the hedgehog's bedroom existed in another dimension, it was so huge that it appeared to rival the size of the house itself. Scores of empty shelves lined the walls where Sonic's books must have been, he guessed. He followed the hedgehog down the length of the room, finally reaching the back wall, where his equally large bed resided. Everything was in the darkest of colours, the only light coming from the ornate candelabra sitting on a small table beside the oversized bed. Knuckles thought for a moment, then "why is your room so big and not Shadow's?"

"Shut it," Sonic replied heatedly. He took the metal candelabra and advanced towards the middle of the far wall, where a single book resided on the shelf there.

"I thought you said your books were all gone."

Sonic rolled his eyes. "Use your imagination, you dolt." He pulled on the top of the book. The echidna found that it wasn't a book at all, but a switch. The shelf swung silently on a well-greased axis, admitting the two animals entry to a dark stairwell.

"You built this place from old horror movies, didn't you?" questioned Knuckles.

Sonic snorted. "Pah! All those movies were based off of my set up," he spat. "Damn nosey tourists." Holding the candelabra high he lead the echidna down the rapidly descending spiral stairway, banishing only the closest shadows.

Knuckles kept as close as he dared, keeping a sharp eye out for… well, anything.

They continued downwards for an impossible distance. Knuckles was sure that they had cleared the lowest level of the house several spirals ago. The walls were slick with moisture and most certainly didn't look as though they had come standard with the original mansion. Not really paying attention to the ground, the echidna nearly fell over when his foot came in contact with solid floor instead of another step.

Sonic looked behind him as Knuckles righted himself and shook his head, rolling his eyes again.

Getting his bearings back, the redhead peered about their new location. "Whoa…" he breathed.

It was a torture chamber. Chains hung from the walls, tipped with an assortment of nasty hooks and blades. Every device of torment the poor echidna could list was present, and then some he couldn't recognise or name. Sonic lead him down the lane of painful instruments as if it were nothing but a sunny walk in the park.

"W-where… did you get all this?" gawped Knuckles as they passed a variety of unearthly devices of warped metal.

"From many years of collecting," he said evasively. "And stop staring. They don't like it."

"They?" A string of rattles from the chains answered the question, making the echidna dash to catch up to his tour-guide. "So…" he hazarded, "why are we down here?"

"Weapons," the hedgehog answered simply. "Ah, here we are."

They stopped their trek before the most intimidating thing the redhead had ever seen. It was a massive Iron Maiden, at least ten feet tall, wrought out of every metal imaginable. The sterling silver face was perfectly chiselled to resemble that of a young woman, the slightly parted lips and half-closed eyes revealing darkness behind the cold metal. Dark stains bled from the openings, but left from what, the red-furred mammal didn't want to know. The monstrous metal beast peered down at them placidly.

The blue hedgehog grasped the side of the metal casket and pulled the Iron Maiden open with unnatural ease. Wicked spikes greeted the two animals as the device of torment was opened. Sonic frowned and closed it again. "Don't play games with me, Sheryl, open up!" he commanded.

"Sheryl?" repeated Knuckles.

A sound whistled through the stained holes in the Maiden's face, like a voice and a wind. It sounded for a whole five seconds, then vanished. Something began to bleed from the eyes and lips of the machine, flowing down the length of the ornate surface of the metal slowly.

Knuckles backed away. "Is that… blood?" he quivered.

Sonic said nothing.

There was a sound of clanging metal from inside the Maiden and the flow of blood halted in place. A second later the flow reversed and disappeared back behind the metal face at an unreal speed. There was then the sound of a lock coming undone, then the device was silent.

"Thank you, Sheryl," said Sonic, reopening the case.

Instead of spikes, the most cruel and wicked looking weapons that the echidna had ever seen now lined the walls of the Iron Maiden in obsessive precision. Looking over the assembled items with a trained eye, the hedgehog picked three weapons from the walls and closed the Maiden. There was a sound of a lock snapping in place as the halves were shut. Turning from the machine the blue-furred animal held out one of the weapons to the red echidna. "Huh?" he said. "What are those?"

"Flails," replied Sonic. "You know how to use Nunchaku, don't you?"

"Yeah," said Knuckles, taking the chained weapons from the hedgehog's hand gingerly. The deadly item was nearly identical to the Nunchaku, only in place of the polished wood sticks were two hooked blades made of bolted, heat-treated steel.

"They work the exact same way," explained the hedgehog. "Only instead of bashing people and breaking their bones you get to tear them in half instead."

The echidna made a face and held out the weapon with two fingers as if they were diseased. "Oh." Knuckles never really liked purposefully lethal weapons. Though of course, any weapon was lethal in the right hands.

Sonic saw his expression. "You'll need them, trust me. You wont be feeling any remorse for what we'll be going up against."

"Is it too late to back out?"

"Yes."

Sonic brushed past him back to the stairway, carrying the remaining two weapons on his shoulders. Knuckles followed quickly after, keeping a safe hold on the bladed Flail.

For some reason, and one the redhead didn't want to speculate on, it took the two of them considerably less time to get back up to the bedroom than it had taken to reach the bottom. Knuckles heaved a sigh of relief as the concealing shelf closed over the dark passage.

Setting the bronze candelabra back on the table, Sonic brought out one of the two weapons and examined it critically. Knuckles peered at it with a concerned expression. It was a scythe. Huge, and ornately crafted. The shaft and handles were fashioned from a dark wood that rivalled the tone of ebony, while the blade was made of what looked like smoked glass.

"Will that thing hold?" Knuckles asked, pointing at the semi-transparent blade. "It looks…"

"Like it's made of glass?" Sonic finished for him. He brought the weapon to bare experimentally, testing it. "Trust me, Knuckles. This thing could shear through ten-fold steel as if it were mere cottage cheese." He swung the wicked weapon at the speed of light, letting the shimmering blade pause just before the echidna's nose. "It's a favourite of mine," he hissed.

The echidna took a step back, sweating.

Sonic brandished the weapon and stilled it in a neutral position, the blade angled to the ground. He grabbed the third weapon, a metal-wrought staff lined with innumerable ores. The staff wormed in his grasp, wrapping around his arm like a snake, freeing both hands for the hedgehog to use with the dark Scythe.

"What's with the staff?" asked the redhead.

"It's for Shadow. I'm putting it out of the way," he explained. "I was never any good with staves…" he said to himself as he made for the exit.

The two armed mammals headed from the massive bedroom out into the hallway.

Tails came rocketing up the stairs. "Can I watch TV?" he asked innocently. Polly squawked from downstairs.

Sonic gave him a look. "You're already watching TV."

"I know."

"So why are you asking me?"

"Because."

Sonic pinched the space between his eyes. "Because why, Tails? No more beating-about-the-bush, I'm busy."

"I'm not beating a bush. I have to be outside to do that. But Mr. Eggman won't let me in his yard anymore," he whined.

He sighed in exasperation. Dr. Eggman, their fantasy-world foe, their next-door neighbour, had banned the troublesome fox from his property some time ago, after the two-tailed freak had decided to practice his version of Riverdance on his prized flowerbed. "Ag. What's wrong with the television, Tails?" he asked again.

"Polly won't let me watch my shows," Tails complained.

"Polly wants a cracker!" shouted the bird from the living room.

"Then go play scrabble or something," said Sonic impatiently.

"But I wanna watch TV!" bawled the fox.

Sonic huffed angrily. "Polly!" he called out. "Let the freak watch his shows!"

"Squawk!" was Polly's answer.

The hedgehog nudged the fox with his foot. "There, now go away."

Tails instantly brightened. "Yay!" He ran down the stairs.

"Dumb freak," swore Sonic. "Come on," he motioned for the echidna to follow him down the hallway.

The two stood before Shadow's bedroom door, the mist still pouring out from under the slab of wood.

"Alright," said Sonic. "Here we go." He grabbed the doorknob and turned it.

* * *

**TBC! Still more to come!**


	11. Monsters under the bed

**DISCLAIMERS: Sonic and his pea-brained posse all belong to the Sonic Team and Yuji Naka.**

**BUT: The worm, the heaps of trash, the other heaps of trash and the abyss are mine.**

* * *

CHAPTER 11: MONSTERS UNDER THE BED

The door opened. A source-less, orange light blared before them, mists billowing about their forms. An unearthly wind blew from the void.

"On my mark!" shouted Sonic over the wind.

Knuckles nodded, keeping a firm hold on the Flails.

"One, two, now!"

The two giant mammals jumped over the threshold of the light. The feeling of being pulled through an interPlane highway coursed through their bodies, turning their stomachs in unpleasant directions. The orange light faded, replaced by a dark corridor of sinuous material.

WELCOME TO UNDER-BED-WORLDIA! came an obnoxious voice out of nowhere.

The two creatures looked about frantically for the source of the voice, being caught totally unprepared as a flat, circular shelf rushed up to meet them. They hit the shelf hard.

REMEMBER TO VISIT THE GIFT SHOP FOR ALL KINDS OF CHEAP, USELESS STUFF!

"Ug…" groaned Sonic as he unstuck himself from the ground.

PLEASE REMEMBER WHERE YOU PARKED! said the voice, nearer now.

The bruised hedgehog looked up to see a floating, flat television screen fabricated from reddish-purple metal and wires.

GREETINGS!

"Oh, good God, not again…"

"Wha? Where are we?" bubbled the echidna beside him.

WELCOME TO UNDER-BED-WORLDIA! repeated the screen enthusiastically.

"'Under-bed-worldia'?" copied Knuckles questioningly, totally lost.

Sonic glared at the screen evilly.

I WILL BE YOUR TOUR GUIDE!

Knuckles blinked. "Did we somehow… step into a time portal or something…? 'Cause that's what it really feels like."

Sonic let his head drop soundly to the floor. "This can't be happening…"

PLEASE KEEP YOUR ARMS AND LEGS INSIDE THE DISK AT ALL TIMES!

"What?"

The circular shelf jolted and fell from where it hung over the abyss, plunging into darkness. Knuckles clung to his landlord, screeching like a baby. Sonic did nothing, a most unhappy expression spread over his face.

The disk finally detached itself from the wide corridor of the abyss, still plummeting downward. It jolted to a slower speed as a multitude of dim, dark lights twinkled into view, slowly outlining the spires and walls of a junk-yard city. Sonic clung to the edge of the flying disk as he leaned forward to get a better look. The trash-city was encased in a bulge in the dark corridor, its very edges dropping off into further darkness. He could pick out piles of stuffed toys and pillows, things that people 'lost' under their beds. For thousands of untold years no-one had ever been able to tell where the stuff went. Well, now they knew.

WELCOME TO UNDER-BED-WORLDIA! said the voice again.

Sonic glared at the screen. "Would you shut up? You've said that three times now."

WELCOME TO UNDER-BED-WORLDIA!

His eyes narrowed dangerously. "I don't like you…"

The hovering disk angled its descent to skim a few meters over the piles of lost trash. The blue hedgehog spotted something, throwing his head over the rim of the tour-disk to get a better look.

"Oi! Stop the ride!" he commanded.

PLEASE KEEP YOUR HANDS AND FEET INSIDE THE DISK AT ALL TIMES! repeated the tour guide.

Sonic glared at the floating screen again. "As your _valued_ customer, I _demand_ that you halt this flying pancake!"

PLEASE KEEP YOUR HANDS AND FEET INSIDE THE DISK AT ALL TIMES!

The hedgehog rolled his eyes. "Bite me." With that he threw himself over the edge, though not without dragging the startled echidna off with him.

The two mammals hit the accumulated under-bed treasures with a muffled 'whap!' Knuckles fought back up for air. "Blag! Gross!"

Sonic remained buried, digging around in the mounds of stolen goods. Bits and pieces of forgotten stuffed bear and broken trinkets flew from where the blue hedgehog dug about, searching frantically for whatever it was he was searching for.

"What are you doing?" questioned Knuckles loudly as he dodged the projectiles that randomly came his way.

"I'm looking for my stuff," came the terse reply.

"In this heap of junk? I'd be surprised if you could find a fully intact pillowcase."

Sonic stood up with just that in his hands.

The echidna blinked. "Well, whatever! You know what I mean!"

"Oh? Do I?" the hog mocked, hurling the plush item at the redhead's face. He promptly dove back into the depths of filth, pushing and tossing about lumps of stuff.

Knuckles preoccupied himself by rubbing at his assaulted visage, trying to wipe away the microscopic invaders that had clung to the fluffy, and deceptively harmless, pillowcase.

"Ah ha!" cheered Sonic, standing up with a large tome clasped in his hands. "I finally found you, oh!" he cooed, hugging the aged volume to his chest tightly like a child would his most treasured toy. "I won't let you out of my sight again! You're safe now, daddy's got you…"

Knuckles paused in his futile attempts at cleanliness to stare at the blue maniac, unsure of what to make of what was taking place right before his eyes. "Uh… Sonic?"

The animal jumped and span around. "What?" he demanded, scowling fiercely.

The red mammal flinched at the force of the expression. "Er, nothing."

The other's eyes narrowed. He clutched at his book protectively. "This. This book here," he said pointing to the ancient tome with a finger. "This is _mine_. _You_ do not touch. Touch, and _die_."

Knuckles looked at his landlord with a concerned expression on his face. "You… feeling okay, Sonic?"

"_MINE!_"

The echidna covered his head with his arms. "Yes, yes, it's yours!" he shouted, cringing.

"I'm glad we could come to a mature understanding," said Sonic simply, turning away to rummage through some more piles of detritus.

The redhead made a face. But he kept his mouth shut for the betterment of his overall existence. "What are you doing now?" he asked instead.

"I'm looking for the rest of my books."

"The 'rest'? But don't you have, like, a hundred of them?"

Sonic didn't look up from his current mountain of trash. "On the contrary, I have, 'like', several hundreds of books," he corrected snobbishly.

The poor echidna wasn't sure if he should have felt insulted or confounded. Hundreds? There was no possible way they could find them all. And what about Shadow? "What about your brother?" he questioned.

"Who?"

"Shadow! What are we going to do about him? He's somewhere down here too."

"Oh, yeah," drawled the hog, standing up. "I guess we'll have to go and get him. Useless…" he made motions with his free hand, trying to think up an effective insult. "Trop," he improvised.

"Is that even a real word?"

"Shut up, you!" Huffing like an insulted snob he didn't walk so much as literally goose-step over the unsteady mounds of lost bedroom things, trying not to trip and fall on his face. "Come on, twit-monkey," he quipped, grabbing the echidna by the arm to drag him along. "We have a useless bundle of hair to rescue."

Knuckles tried to keep up with the other as the hedgehog power-marched through the debris. Having no real choice speed-wise due to the fact that he was being towed by the arm, all the while nearly getting his feet lodged in various holes and boxes along the way, though he kept up as best he could.

The lights that they had seen from the air were slowly getting closer. Soon, though not really, a tall wall also met their gaze, rising higher as they approached. Eventually, meaning after many hundreds of long, calculated steps, they stood not too far from the wall. Searchlights flashed and ran over the layers discarded stuff, bathing the trash in periodic floods of light. Sonic stopped just beyond the reach of the lights, looking over the wall and the pattern of the swaying spots of light critically. Knuckles stood quietly, his arm still trapped in the other's iron grip. The Flails remained still in his free hand. Sonic's Scythe was slung casually over his shoulder, book in one hand. The echidna nearly lost his balance completely as his escort suddenly shot forward, moving on a carefully calculated path, dodging the lights to press his and Knuckles' bodies against the hard, cold stone. "You think you could have moved any slower?" the blue furred hedgehog hissed in agitation.

Knuckles glared at Sonic. "It's not like you decided to tell me what you were planning on doing!" he hissed back, tacking the other's note of quiet to heart.

Sonic wasn't listening. Still clutching the echidna's arm he slunk silently along the cold stone wall. Within a few moments a gate came into view. Warped metal rose above the wall importantly, telling the angry blue hedgehog that it was the only public, and private, entrance. He tapped his fingers under his nose in thought, scanning the wall. He didn't dare go any closer to the gate, no. It was rather clear from the set-up along the wall that whoever or whatever ran the place didn't like visitors.

With hardly a sound Sonic turned around and backtracked down the way he had come, pulling the confused echidna after him. They may have weapons, and they could easily take out anything that came their way, Sonic was sure, but the commotion of an early fight would decrease their chances of finding both his brother and his stolen things.

* * *

His head hurt. His entire body hurt.

Sonic's twin gurgled in rising consciousness, twitching under a single, bright light. Shifting unhappily he noticed with some confusion that he couldn't really move, stuck in place on a wooden tea-party chair. What the hell? Sonic better not have glued him to Tails' old highchair again; ooh how he'd pay if he was forced to wear pants again. Blinking blearily he tried again to remove himself from the discarded piece of furniture. Still the same resistance met his struggles. And it wasn't glue. Fully awake now Shadow began to pull against his tethers forcefully. Old, multiple lengths of assorted rope kept him tied down securely, and they reeked of an evil touch. Shadow was beginning to panic, straining under the glare of the single hooded light.

A rustling caught his attention. Stilling himself he peered into the shadows beyond the light. The glare of the bulb above him prevented the hedgehog from adjusting his vision to properly survey the darkness. Keeping silent he reached out with all of his senses, hoping to get some form of indication as to where he was and who had indignantly tied him to a pink tea-chair. The sound came again, slightly closer this time, accompanied by a heavy reek of boiled broccoli and red onions. The rustling inched closer, morphing into a sick squishing noise as it became more clear.

Ears going flat against his head Shadow pressed himself against the back of the girly chair, still searching the darkness for the intruder. As the sound continued to near, it got _bigger_. Whatever was coming, it was big, and in desperate need of a bath. The mass of whatever it was stopped just beyond the light, where the captive hedgehog could not see it.

The feeling of being stared at got the better him. "Who's there?" Shadow called out.

A gurgling that could just qualify as laughter sounded from the darkness. "Mahg, you're awake, I see," came the thick, sick reply.

Shadow cringed at the voice; it was heavy and coated in more than enough layers of malice and general illness. He tried to pull against his bonds discretely. "Who are you?"

The voice coughed in a sick-like way. "That is none of your concern -hack-"

"I beg to differ," replied the hedgehog.

The hidden speaker shifted in the gloom, just enough so that the captive caught a glimpse of a limb of some kind, sewn together from…fabric? The owner of the voice coughed again, making no effort to stifle the fits. "Gah… Best to keep to yourself," it wheezed. "You are our prisoner. Your well-being depends on my good graces."

Shadow cringed at the multiple coughs. How unclean! "I have no intension of making you angry," he said sweetly. "I just want to know who I am under the custody of."

"Silence!" retorted the voice. "Your purpose shall be revealed soon enough, over-worlder."

A sloshing noise told the black and red hedgehog that his captor had left. A deep-rooted feeling of dread had begun to rise in his mind. Getting the general idea that there might not be too much time left on his life-clock, Shadow began a new round of struggles against his multicoloured tethers.

* * *

They had back-tracked much further than where they had started in the first place. Knuckles trudged along with his temperamental companion as quietly as the squeaking teddies underfoot would allow. He nearly bashed bodily into his landlord's sharp spines as the other came to an abrupt halt, feeling the wall. Good grief, he hoped he wouldn't ask him to punch a hole in it.

Having let go of the echidna's arm Sonic ran a hand over the grey stone. Something was here, he could feel it. But what? There was too much interference from the forces within and beyond the wall itself for him to make out the supernatural signal clearly.

"'ello!" came a small voice.

The two giant mammals looked about frantically while grasping their weapons tightly, thinking the worst.

"Down 'ere!" said the little voice.

They reverted their gazes downwards. Perched between the stones of the wall was a tiny red and blue haired worm with bright, dark eyes, wearing a scarf. Knuckles blinked. Sonic made a face.

"What be you two fine chaps doing down 'ere?" asked the worm politely.

Knuckles pointed at the tiny being. "The worm… is talking."

"O' course I talk!" confirmed the worm. "I see you can talk too, though I can't say the same for your blue friend there."

Sonic did a take from this. "You're a bookworm, aren't you?"

"Yeah, that's righ'," replied the worm with a smile, eyeing the tome in the hedgehog's hand. "You two look like you could need a nice fresh cup o' tea. I have a kettle on righ' now, if you'd like to join me. It's always nice to have visitors."

Sonic wasn't fooled by the worm's friendly attitude. He kept a firm grip on the volume. "We can't, we're trying to get to the other side of this wall."

The worm blinked. "Well. There's a gate back the way you came."

"We can't use the gate," replied Sonic. "We need a different way in."

The worm's eyes narrowed mischievously. "Well… there is another way in… more secret if that's what you're looking for."

Sonic narrowed his own gaze. "You know of a way? You're willing to help us? What's the catch?"

The bookworm grinned easily. "You know a fair bit about us, it seems, friend." The tiny thing met the hedgehog's gaze evenly, which was saying a lot. "The way is clear of guards and such. It will send you to the back of an alley, where none can see."

"Does it work both ways?"

"Why yes, it does."

There was an uneasy silence as the two beings kept each other's gaze.

Knuckles looked back and forth between the two, at a total loss of what was transpiring in the quiet. "Will you show us the way?" he questioned.

"For a price," replied the red and blue worm. "And I can assure your trust. I have no ties to what dwells beyond the wall."

"Even so, what are you after?" interrogated Sonic.

"But you already know," said the bookworm slyly.

Sonic's narrow gaze evolved to a glare. "No."

"Then you're stuck here," said the scarf-wearing creature simply.

"Wh-wha?" stammered Knuckles. "Whoa, hold it, what's going on? What's he want?"

"The runt wants my book," growled Sonic, not taking his gaze from the worm.

"Your book?"

"Oh yes, it looks quite tasty," said the bookworm, licking its thin lips. "I just love a good book, don't you?"

"You keep away!" scolded Sonic, ears flat against his head.

"Ooh, but then I can't show you the way in, now, can I?" answered the worm mischievously, a sly grin spreading over its visage.

Sonic looked like he wanted to kill something. Knuckles couldn't see what the problem was. "It's only a book, Sonic-"

"'Only a book'! '_Only a book_'!" the hedgehog repeated incredulously.

The shocked echidna realised too late that he had trod on a nerve.

"This book is my life!" shouted Sonic, clutching the ancient tome protectively. "I will not let that insect have it!"

"But what about your brother?" insisted Knuckles.

Sonic fumed, unsure of how to retaliate. He turned his fiery glare to the grinning worm. He gritted his teeth. "Alright. But only a few pages, that's all."

"Fair enough," agreed the worm. "It looks worth it. But we'll see."

Making a pained expression, the blue mammal opened the volume to a set of empty yellowed sheets. Taking a few between his fingers he carefully tore them from the spine. The echidna swore that the maniacal creature looked as if he was about to cry. Pages in hand the hedgehog passed them to the waiting bookworm. The little beast greedily took the sheets and began to devour them savagely. Sonic cringed as the last of the pages disappeared into the insect's gullet.

The bookworm heaved a heavy sigh of satisfaction. "Aah, now that was a book. Those pages were more than enough, thank you, good sir," said the worm to Sonic.

The hedgehog glared. "Now keep your end of the deal. Where's the secret entrance?" he demanded, trying to save face in his distress.

The tiny creature blinked. "Oh, yes! Of course! The secret passage is right 'ere, sirs; just beside me."

Both of the giant rodents looked about the wall. "But… there's only stone," said Knuckles.

"That's what it's supposed to look like, see?" replied the worm. "So that it can never be found by those who built this place; it was built by folks like yourselves. Strangers."

Still sizing the wall, Sonic moved towards it. Peering closely he put out his hand slowly. As his outstretched fingers neared, they did not touch with stone, but air. A door-sized portion of the wall shimmered ever so slightly, shifting in a fourth dimension all it's own to produce an optical-deifying portal to the other side. With a huff Sonic stepped through and disappeared through the stone.

Knuckles rushed up to the wall, but stopped short. He looked at the layered stone with uncertainty.

The echidna could hardly voice a yelp as a gloved hand materialised through the wall, grabbed a hold of his arm and dragged him into the hidden portal.

* * *

**TBC! Getting tired yet? There's still more to come, so hold on to your hats! NOTE: Trop is a real word. It is either an abreviation of 'tropical' or 'tropic', or is a prefix used before vowels. Not a very effective insult now, is it?**


	12. Rituals and creeping walls

**DISCLAIMERS: Sonic and his poser pals all belong to the Sonic Team and Yuji Naka.**

**BUT: The walls and the hell-pit and whatever else are mine.**

**PLEASE folks remember to read and review! I need to know what you think! Of course, if all you're going to say is not-nice things then kindly keep your comments to yourself. Constructive crit of all kinds is highly appreciated, but flames will be met with plagued gibberish and colourful responses which will be kept to myself and my imaginary army of evil booger-people. I have a wide vocabulary and I'm not afraid to use it.**

**NOTE: Help me! I heard somewhere that you can submit illustarted stories here, but I can't for the life of me find out how. If anybody here knows how this is done _please_ tell me! I will be eternally grateful! Send me an e-mail, or send a review with the info. If I have it totally wrong, be kind and tell me. If I'm deluding myself over this I want to know _before_ my head explodes.**

**Thanks a bunch!**

* * *

CHAPTER 12: RITUALS AND CREEPING WALLS

Shadow sat quietly under the glare of the hooded light, his energy long since spent. The struggles against the bonds that held him had amounted to no good of any kind. His wrists and ankles were raw from the scraping of the ropes, and his bottom was beginning to ache madly on the hard wood of the tea-party chair. His 'gracious' host had not shown himself since their first encounter, and Shadow hoped to keep it that way. Though it was safe to say he felt as though he would be seeing the thing in the near future if he didn't get himself out.

* * *

The lord of the under-bed world wallowed contemplatively in his throne room, his chair of station lost somewhere beneath his mass. The being narrowed his gaze in the darkness, something was coming.

Shooting down the hallway to float before him was a crackling television screen.

The lord hacked sickly. "Blag. What do you want?" he slathered.

MASTER, greeted the purple screen. THE INTRUDERS HAVE ESCAPED.

"What?" the ruler asked incredulously, sitting up. "Where are they?" he demanded.

THEY FELL INTO THE PILES, LORD. I COULD NOT FIND THEM.

Scowling fiercely, the sentient mass of stuff and yuck swung his arm at the screen, instantly dashing the entire apparatus to pieces. Such a useless thing. But it didn't matter now, anyway. Whoever had trod unlawfully into their secret domain would pose no threat to them. After all, how could they? Mere over-worlders. They could not stop what was to be put in motion.

Grinning with a set of yellow, crooked teeth the lord of under-bed detritus summoned his slaving guards. He sent them to fetch their tethered guest.

It was time.

* * *

Knuckles stumbled into the alley. He'd never get used to all this otherworldly travel.

Sonic was unfazed, scanning over the alleyway with a sharp gaze. He held the Scythe close.

Remembering his own weapon, the echidna redoubled his hold on it, as if it would give him comfort.

The world around them was dark. Shadows clung to every surface like parasites, ungiving in the weak lights. Brick structures lined either side of them, looming and silent. Clotheslines hung far above their heads, dirty rags of all sizes draped over the ropes. The shuttered windows showed no signs of life behind them, which was just as well.

Sonic wasn't liking the look of it at all. Where were the folk? He could sense no traces of life of any kind on this side of the wall. But, there was a… presence, something he could not describe. It disturbed him. Something was not right here.

Turning to face the echidna he made a silent motion for Knuckles to follow him. Gripping the feather-weight Scythe he advanced down the alleyway towards the dimly lighted streets.

Keeping the Flails in the ready position about his shoulder, Knuckles kept a silent pace with his blue furred landlord. He scrutinized every shadow. He, too, could feel something. Something… wrong. But what was it? What could it be? The answer eluded him, though he could tell that whatever it was wasn't going unnoticed by Sonic, who seemed just as concerned about it as he was, even more so, perhaps. This worried him. Sonic was afraid of nothing. To see him even uncertain of something was upsetting on a morale level and then some. He stopped suddenly, looking at the temperamental leader. Sonic looked very grave. Following the line of his gaze the echidna soon found why.

From over the roofs of the brick buildings rose a shaft of bloody red light, spearing into the darkness above like a beacon.

* * *

The dark hedgehog stiffened in his painful chair. A distant shuffling noise told him that his host had not forgotten him. He did not bother to struggle, as doing so would do him just as little good as before. Four thin-limbed beings approached from the gloom, reeking of stale breath. Shadow pressed his ears against the sides of his head. He could sense no life from these creatures. There was only one other thing he knew to emit such a devoid aura; and that was his own works. These beings were _puppets_.

The scraggly guards bent down unnaturally to each grasp a leg of the chair, hefting it up into the air without hardly a sound. Their featureless faces showed no sign of strain or discomfort, not that the hedgehog weighed very much, as they marched from the cell, bent wholly on fulfilling their master's will.

* * *

Sonic dashed through the empty streets, his mind whirling. That light… it had been a long time since the last instance he had seen such a beacon, and it never boded well. And he knew, deep down in his gut, that his brother, and his books, were all tied into it in some way.

Knuckles struggled to keep up with the speedy hedgehog, running with such ease that he nearly glided over the cobbled stone. Sonic was making a beeline for the light, seemingly drawn to it like a moth to a flame. The red echidna wasn't sure if he should have been worried or not, following almost blindly; after all, what else could he do? He couldn't go back, not without the hedgehog's help. Rushing along he prayed that the blue hog was headed for the beam with the intention to do some form of good once they reached their destination, and not that he was being drawn to it because of his destructive nature.

He ran faster. The hedgehog was speeding up. Knuckles was loosing ground rapidly. "Sonic, wait!" he called out. Too late. Sonic never heard him, dashing away into the distance. The redhead kept after the cloud of dust that signalled his passing for as long as he could before that, too, vanished. Chest heaving he slowed down to a walk. Finding himself in what seemed to be a miniature town square, the echidna made his way to the centre, where a wide fountain squatted amongst the cobble-work. With a slight sigh he sat himself on the rim of the putrid fountain, chin in hand. _No use running blindly about_, he thought. _Sonic's gone, so what now?_ He contemplated. Staying here wasn't a great idea either, as he didn't know what dwelled in this dark place. Would the inhabitants be friendly or hostile? Reasonable or aggressive? All things considered he still had to find a way to catch up with his landlord, or he could wind up being stuck here. Tapping his nose with his gloved hand he looked up towards the bloody beam. Sonic was heading for it, that was plain, and he had a good, strong feeling that Shadow would be there too.

"Then it's settled," he told himself, sitting up. Hopping from the rim of the fountain he considered his directional options. From where he was there were three streets that headed in the general direction of the light. Whether or not they would lead all the way there was questionable, but there was only one way to find out. Gripping the Flails tightly he made his choice and headed towards the light.

* * *

Sonic had only the vaguest feeling that he was alone. The echidna was lost somewhere behind him, but he could not afford to slow down. He could feel the aura wafting from the unholy beacon now; and it was ripe with malice.

Not that he cared, really. Whatever lived down here in this trash-pile of a town were free to do whatever they pleased, as far as he was concerned. However, they were right under _his_ house. They stole _his_ books. They kidnapped _his_ sibling (not that he cared, Shadow could take care of himself). And that was where he drew the line. Whoever it was that thought they could mess with him and his property were going to get it and get it good. Sonic was by far not a forgiving or patient person. If you trod on a nerve you going to be fed both your legs through your nose, and that was only half of it. People who told him that he should become more like the 'Sonic' he acted out on stage were sorely rewarded with a Gigantipede waiting in their living room after their next shopping trip. Of course he had been reprimanded many times for such deeds by those fools at the Institute, threatening him with long terms of solitary confinement and whatnot. He would just laugh at them and send them home with snakes and scorpions in their pants. Solitary confine _this_, he'd tell them.

But Core, he was a different matter. The Director had earned his begrudging respect many years ago, and had the scars to prove it. The giant rodent valued the man's words, though he would never admit it. After all the man was _human_. And all humans were _scum_.

It was _all their fault_.

* * *

They had finally left the dungeons. Shadow sat quietly atop his girly throne, his posterior screaming bloody murder. You think they would have at least given him a cushion or something. Looking down at his quiet escorts he thought about the odd circumstances that brought him there. For one, he got soaked the morning before with pink ooze. Then he got attacked by a skinless arm. And now he was tied to a pink little wooden chair made for five-minute tea parties with stuffed animals, being carried off like some form of ceremonial sacrifice.

What a minute…

Shadow instantly regretted that last thought as they finally stepped into a great cobbled clearing. Swarms of… what could count as people, it seemed, were congealed about the outdoor space. And they were all staring at him. He mad a face. There were _hundreds_ of people _staring_ at him.

* * *

The red shaft of light wasn't really any closer than it was before. Knuckles came to a stop in the alley. There was a wall in front of him. A dead end.

_Great_…

The echidna sighed, shrugging his shoulders. It seemed as though his luck had finally run out for the remainder of the week. Not exactly a very spiriting sign, that. Alright, so he had to backtrack at least as far as the nearest fork in the road. Then he could try again, though at this rate he would likely miss the brothers completely and be left behind.

Shaking his head he turned around and began to jog back the way he had come. He hadn't gone far, however, when he found yet another wall standing before him, blocking his path yet again. Blinking uncertainly, he looked back behind him. There wasn't a wall back this way. The wall was behind him, wasn't it? Sure enough, far back down the length of the dark alley, stood the same wall he had just left. He looked back ahead of him in disbelief. The second wall was still there. "Wha?" questioned Knuckles to himself. He looked back and forth between the two walls a few more times before finally admitting that there was indeed two walls sandwiching him in.

The echidna fought to keep a level head. _Alright, no need to panic_, he told himself, walking back towards the centre of the alleyway._ There must be a logical explanation to this… well maybe not exactly logical_. Reaching the middle of the alley he turned around to pace back the other way. The moment he turned, however, cold brick met his form. He fell back with a confused 'oof.' He looked up. The wall had moved. Instead of being farther down the road, it was now right in front of him. _Okay, definitely not logical_. Getting up he looked back, a sneaking suspicion rising in his mind. He wasn't entirely surprised to find that the other wall had moved closer as well, effectively giving the red echidna a mere five feet of breathing space between him and the oppressive walls, and about say ten between the sides of the alley buildings.

Knuckles kept still in the absolute centre between the four shields of brick, hoping to prevent the stone from inching any closer to his person. He could probably climb over the obtrusive collection of bricks, but he wasn't so sure if the walls themselves would allow it. He was not an entirely superstitious person, despite what he had been through while in Sonic's company, but he wanted to play it safe for the sake of prolonging his life.

Despite what most people thought, Knuckles was actually a very level-headed person. He could admit with pride that he could generally keep a cool head when dealing with most situations, provided that they didn't involve his landlord, who, by the will of some force or another, could totally defy all laws of rationality, not to mention sanity, with hardly a wave of his arm.

Well, Sonic, nor Shadow, were here. So the echidna was more or less free to exercise his general level-headed-ness to his content. Though, how to put it to use in such a pinch, however, was proving to be a radically different matter altogether. After all, how do you deal rationally with two separate slabs of two-tonne brick? Looking to both sides again, Knuckles took a deep, reassuring breath. _Here goes nothing_. "Er… hello? Is there somebody there?" he semi-called out to the walls, trying to sound polite. If there was someone or something controlling the walls, this, he hoped, would be the best approach. If not, then he'd find out soon enough.

There was a few seconds of quiet. Then a collection of clickings sounded from the wall to his right, the first wall he had run into. The second wall answered the first momentarily with its own round of clicking, then both were silent.

The red echidna felt that he was heading in a good direction, so he tried again. "Excuse me," he said to the walls. "I don't mean to intrude, but I need to pass by."

The first enclose began to click to its partner in confinement. The second answered with a rather angry-sounding crash of something.

Knuckles stood uneasily between the two walls, tightly gripping the Flails.

There was a crunching of gravel and suddenly the two walls began to inch forward, closing in on the poor echidna. The redhead looked back and forth frantically, trying to formulate a swift plan of escape. The two slabs of red brick shifted in form, becoming fleshy and soft. Toothy maws materialised in the centre of each of the living masses, opening wide in hunger to swallow the fighter whole. Knuckles gave a little yelp and dashed to the far side of his pen, where unliving brick still resided. With the mounds of ravenous flesh inching nearer at a disheartening speed the echidna leapt for the wall, clinging to it and scrambling upwards as fast as he could go.

Not willing to relinquish their meal just yet, the two living walls shifted their top portions, forming a pulsing dome of sorts to hem the creature in. His only exit blocked Knuckles dropped back to the ground, amethyst eyes wide. As they neared, the two mounds of teeth and flesh began to growl expectantly, it had been a while since they last ate, the natural inhabitants of this place being much more wary than this being they had cornered. It would taste fine.

Saying a silent prayer to his ancestors, the red echidna took an aggressive stance with the Nunchaku, feet spaced wide apart. Swinging the bladed Flails experimentally to quickly accommodate himself with the weapon he whipped one end savagely at one of the walls, the one that had advanced on him first, specifically. He prayed for a split second that the blades would not get stuck in the flesh. Much to his relief, the well-tempered metal sheared through the pulsing mass easily, cutting deep. His confidence brightening, Knuckles didn't pause in his stride, linking the attack with another punishing slash. The hungry walls groaned in surprise with this new turn in events against their favour, balking at the immense amount of vital fluids pouring from their blockish forms. They barely had time to think up an effective retreat as the little echidna swung the weapon at the speed of light, hacking and slashing at both his attackers. Their already supple bodies disintegrating from the assault, the two living walls could but only wish they had let the thing go in the first place as they melted away.

Breathing heavily Knuckles finally halted his attack. Coming back to his senses he realised that he was covered, and surrounded by, thick jelly, which had formerly been the life-juices of the two walls. Batting at himself in attempts to brush away the stuff, he stepped on, and thus tripped over, a collection if small ivory spears. Landing soundly on his rump, the echidna gave his own glare to the objects responsible. He blinked in surprise. The spears were the walls' teeth; and they were all that remained, aside from the goo, of them. Reaching out with a gloved hand he took three of the impressive teeth in his grasp. Feeling that this event was rather monumental in his trek of life he decided to keep them as a memento, stashing them away under the protective folds of his fighting gloves. Getting back up onto his feet he quickly, and much more calmly, brushed himself off and headed back towards the fountain to pick a new path.

* * *

The tower of red light was nearing by the second, albeit slowly. Sonic wove this way and that down the deserted city streets, not exactly going in a straight line. Of course, if he could ram through walls he'd be there already, but that was sadly not the case, so zigzagging about would have to do.

He retained his sure grip on his weapon of choice and his treasured book, keeping also a sharp look-out for any beings, living or undead (just in case) that could spoil his cover. If he wanted to reach the beacon quickly he would have to remain unseen for as long as possible; though he had close to no doubts that his presence, and that of his colleague, were at least known to whatever dwelled here.

The thought didn't comfort him. But then again, nothing really comforted Sonic, not with things the way they were now. He growled to himself and increased his pace. The past was in the past, and that was the way it should remain, no matter how much he wished it to be otherwise.

* * *

The four lifeless guards set him down, still on his little chair, on a great alter, risen by stone steps to hang over the wide edge of the pit. Blaring out from the great pit was the red light, bathing much of the immediate area in a dim haze of scarlet. Having being left alone, Shadow began to twist in his chair again. Even with somewhat renewed strength he could not loosen himself from the bonds. He couldn't feel his rump either.

"The time has come!"

Shadow looked up at the commanding shout. Every creature present had become as quiet as mud.

"The time has come!" repeated the voice, which happened to belong to the messy under-bed lord, still sounding sick and generally unhealthy. The being stood at the opposite side of the pit, and even at such a great distance, Shadow could see him clearly. He balked. The thing was practically a blob, sewn together from discarded and rotting materials, translucent green ooze squeezing out from between the haphazard seams. "Long have we waited, we, of the shadowed world."

Shadow sat still in mid-struggle, listening intently.

"With this coming tide of power we may take what should rightfully be ours. The world above!" he shouted, hands in the air. He was answered by a chorus of cheers and cries from the assembled crowd.

_Good lord, not one of these madmen_, thought Shadow vehemently.

"Rise! Rise, Lord Buhni!" chanted the presumed ruler. The earth about the pit began to shake. "Take this sacrifice! Take the life of this upper-world dweller and spill your rage upon those from which he came!"

Shadow was sweating in his chair.

The pit rumbled loudly. A _limb_ flowed out from the light of the pit's depths, followed after by a shoulder, then a head. The fearsome thing turned slowly to face the trembling hedgehog with burning red eyes.

Losing all of what remained of his nerve, Shadow closed his eyes and shrieked.

* * *

**TBC! We're on the home stretch! So bear with me!**


	13. Stuffed horror

**DISCLAIMERS: Sonic and his zombie companions all belong to the Sonic Team and Yuji Naka.**

**BUT: Everything else, including the lapses in space, are mine.**

* * *

CHAPTER 13: STUFFED HORROR

The cry reverberated through the settlement.

In two separate portions of the city, two separate beings looked up and around them to pinpoint the source of the shriek.

The blue hedgehog frowned in both disgust and worry. He recognised the voice responsible, and knew that only a prize few things could make his twin scream like that, let alone at all. Despite what many thought, he guessed, Shadow was as cruel as he was, if not more sadistic. As polite and 'friendly' as he was, many a dark thought was hidden behind his deceptively kind mannerisms. Sure, he would say 'thank-you' and 'please' as much as you wanted, though he'd just as quickly turn around and tear-off your jaw, still smiling ever-so-sweetly. He held fierce grudges, and more often than not refused to relinquish them. And being what he was, Shadow instantly hated any being, good or evil, that came across his treasured staff of power. Any who dared to use it were sure to find themselves on a one-way express trip to suffering unless they tried to make amends fast enough. Sonic had seen many an all-powerful tyrant and well-meaning ruler fall to ruin and despair for that exact reason. As a part of his own treaty for freedom, Shadow had to give his staff into the keeping of the I.S.I.D., where it had been locked away along with a few of Sonic's belonging's, including what had once been his left arm, until it had healed and grew back.

He had warned Core many times of what could come should the staff ever go missing. Thankfully, the human wasn't so daft as to ignore his words. Everything that they had confiscated from the twins was kept deep in the Institute's Vault far below ground, behind countless alarms and doors of steel. Even then, and quite possibly their best tactic for the prevention of theft, only Core and a few others knew of what rested within the Vault.

The azure creature stopped, cursing slightly. He wouldn't get there in time at this rate. There was only one other way to reach his sibling, but it would instantly draw every supernatural being's attention for at least a mile around. Well, considering where he was heading, it probably wouldn't matter.

He took a neutral stance, setting his Scythe to rest with the blade to the ground. He prepared to chant, but stopped short. He could drag the echidna with him.

The thought appealed to him. Even with the redhead so far as he could possibly be in such a place he could still entrap him in his vortex if he concentrated enough. It would be easier if he had something of the echidna's, but he had long since made it a point not to carry somebody else's stuff about on his person.

Closing his eyes he began to chant, hands together, in a quiet voice. As the incantation continued, a circle of power formed about his feet. Nearly finished, he held the final note, reaching out with his conscious to pinpoint that of his dreadlocked 'companion'. He grinned evilly as he found his target.

* * *

Knuckles looked about. What a horrible sound. It was like a mashing of singing glass and a thousand children on a hellish rollercoaster ride.

What on earth could make such a sound?

Shivering, he hoped he'd never have to meet whatever possessed such a cry.

Clearing his thoughts, the echidna continued on his way. He had reached the square and already picked a new path, heading down it at a fair pace. He also kept a sharp eye out for any suspicious-looking walls, just in case.

An odd tingling sensation suddenly flooded his system. A dim light began to form at his feet. Looking down his heart instantly filled with dread. Had he stepped into another unseen trap? He hardly had enough time to voice a last prayer as his form faded into thin air in the middle of the circle of light.

* * *

Sonic felt himself being pulled through time and space. Though not entirely time, since that required a lot more concentration and energy. He gave a small smirk as he caught sight of a red form barrelling through the planes of existence to meet with him on his chosen path.

The stunned expression on the echidna's face was priceless, something worthy of the whole 'Kodiak Moment' slogan. The hedgehog couldn't help but laugh maniacally.

Knuckles was dumbfounded. A second ago he was walking down the street, and now he was floating beside his sadistic landlord in some abyss. And judging from the disgusting wrenching feeling in his gut, they were being pulled along yet another supernatural highway. His sense of balance nearly gave out on him completely when the ride finally ended, and probably not for the last time for today, either. Trying to regain his equilibrium he stayed as close to his temperamental co-star as possible on the cobbled earth. What little constitution that remained in the little echidna promptly went on strike as his spinning vision rested on the forms of not hundreds, but thousands of otherworldly creatures hissing and glaring at them.

Sonic was unfazed, training his emerald gaze upon the tethered form of his hated sibling and what loomed over him from within the pit. Realisation of what the behemoth was dawning on him, the blue being just gawped in disbelief.

The thing, sensing a disturbance in the surreal continuum with the hedgehog's arrival, turned its head to eye the intruders.

Shadow, noticing the change in events, halted his feral shrieks. "About time!" he called out to his fraternal twin, straining against his bonds for emphasis.

Sonic blinked.

Knuckles followed his gaze upwards, jaw dropping at the sight of the behemoth. "Wha…?"

The thing roared.

Sonic lifted a finger, pointing. "It's a… stuffed… rabbit?"

The giant stuffy bellowed like a depth-dwelling beast, it's blossom-pink fur standing out on end.

Sonic's expression of surprise instantly flattened into an ugly scowl. "YOU BROUGHT ME HERE FOR A RABBIT!" he shouted incredulously at his brother.

"I didn't bring you here," said Shadow pointedly. "You brought yourself here, it seems. And what do you mean by 'rabbit'? It's a hell-bunny!" he shrieked back. "It's horrible!"

Sonic pinched the space between his eyes, groaning loudly. "I don't believe it. You were shrieking your face off because of a stuffed animal! A swear I no longer know you."

Shadow went red in the face. "How would you like it if you were about to be eaten by a forty-foot toy!"

"I wouldn't like it at all! But at least I wouldn't be screaming at the top of my lungs like some school-girl!"

"Get up here and HELP me, you stupid freak!" shrieked the dark hedgehog, jumping in his little chair of torture.

"Bite me, you dim-witted git!" shot Sonic. "You can wait until I find the rest of my books!"

Shadow gawped. His brother was putting his books before him. Ooh, he'd get him back for that. See how he likes it once the tea became exclusive.

The giant stuffed rabbit-beast wasn't about to let itself be ignored. Roaring obscenely it hauled its mass from the pit, intent on turning the azure creature into nothing more than a bloody smear on the ground.

Knuckles saw this coming. "Uh, Sonic?"

"What?" questioned the hedgehog irately.

"Th-the giant bunny is h-headed our way," he stammered, pointing towards the advancing demon with a shaking finger.

Sonic sighed in exasperation. Gripping his Scythe, he shoved his treasured book into the echidna's arms. "Drop it and you're dead," he said. Before the startled redhead could so much as even register what just happened, Sonic readied his Scythe in both his hands and dashed towards the monster toy, shouting an ancient war cry. "_Lor'iaaaaaaahhhhhh!_"

The demon bunny was rather surprised at the speed at which its right leg suddenly split in two, causing the monstrosity to topple over. It caught itself, preserving most of its demonic dignity. By this time most of the crowd had begun to scream and wail, as most crowds often tend to do when anything larger than twenty feet has decided to break the unseen boundary of the 'comfort zone'. The under-bed lord ordered his guards to make a hasty retreat, each taking a corner of his 'throne' and hefting him from the ground to shuffle with difficulty to safety.

Sonic wiped the blade of his weapon clear of stray fluff, not about to get carried away. The enraged being behind him was bleeding fluff from its monster wound, its foot thrown somewhere amongst the masses. The pink bunny of doom, Lord Buhni, re-angled itself to face its antagonist on its paws and knees, red eyes burning fiercely. Its face contorting savagely in anger it screamed at the little blue hedgehog, exposing a fearsome mouth cavity stuffed full of sharp teeth. The entire foundations of the square reverberated with the cry, causing some outhouse shacks to topple over and send their occupants fleeing.

Sonic readied his Scythe for another pass.

Lord Buhni wasn't about to let such an attack land so easily upon it again. Sucking in a deep breath it spewed forth a noxious gas, olive green and sparking with purple lights, from its pit of a body. The thick cloud of poisonous fumes proved to be highly unsafe, reducing any who were unfortunate enough to be caught in it to melt away as if splashed with overpowered mustard gas.

Knuckles had retreated to the alter at this point, watching in horror as the natural inhabitants of the dark settlement were reduced to dark puddles of ooze. Trying to push the awful sight from his eyes he began to free Shadow from his brightly coloured chair.

The blue hedgehog wasn't about to let some corrosive cloud get in his way. Keeping the blade of the Scythe low to the ground as if he were carrying a baseball bat, he charged at the super-stuffy. He swung the weapon as he entered the miasma, parting the cloud cleanly for his passage.

Lord Buhni scowled, and tried to dodge the coming blow. Though due to its sheer size it couldn't for the life of it completely get out of the way. It roared furiously as its right arm fell from its place, woven skin reduced to tatters were the otherworldly weapon had cut into it.

Sonic landed deftly on the creature's back, running along the beast's length, digging the Scythe into the pink fur as he went. The resulting tear in the demon's form poured fluff from the unseen depths of its make, littering the cobbled earth below with chunks of the suffocating material.

The demon reared backwards at the pain, instantly sitting up into a kneeling position. The action threw its harasser from its back, sending the tiny animal sailing through the air. The giant stuffed bunny screamed in agony, flailing its one good arm.

The Sega hero flew through the air, careening in space. By some form of either luck or simple chance, his fall was broken by the mass of the slowly retreating under-bed lord. Writhing amongst the plushy mass he sat up, staring straight into the surprised, and disgusting, face of the creature he instantly deemed responsible for his terrible morning. "You!" he shrieked, pointing accusingly. "You're responsible for all this!"

The messy lord blinked in confusion.

"You stole my books!" accused Sonic loudly. "Give them back! Or so help me I'll topple this sickly establishment brick by brick!"

The lord of under-bed trash frowned back. "Blag. I have never seen any of your books," he defended.

"Liar!"

"FOOLS!" came a roar.

All heads turned to fixate upon the tortured form of Lord Buhni.

"FOOLS!" the demon roared again, shuddering uncontrollably. "PITIFUL FOOLS!"

Sonic stood atop the under-bed ruler's mass, glaring at the enraged thing in defiance.

Lord Buhni continued to shudder and shake. Suddenly, a skinless tentacle shot from the obscene wound running down its back.

Sonic only just got out of the way as the appendage slammed overtop the under-bed lord and his guards, reducing the lot of them to nothing. The hedgehog could only gawp, the identity of the limb not escaping him.

The demon had managed to get back onto its feet, the severed foot having been replaced by a new, and once again, skinless one. Its wounds had stopped bleeding fluff, and were now instead oozing a dark, orange and red jelly that congealed into form-perfect domes upon touching the ground. Lord Buhni's missing right arm was fountaining the icky jell like some b-rated horror movie, orange and red globs flying from its shoulder. The fountain momentarily erupted fiercely, the all-too familiar skinless arm taking residence where the first had been.

The brothers and their echidna companion stared in total disbelief at the thing, replays of the events in Shadow's bedroom whipping through their minds.

Its new limbs still dribbling orange and red ooze Lord Buhni began to shamble towards the three giant rodents, gnashing its crooked teeth. It blinked its eyes forcefully, their red glare instantly replaced by a glowing, milky white sheen rimmed with fevered red.

Knuckles nearly lost consciousness, remembering too clearly the time he had met those eyes while being the rope in a life-threatening tug-of-war.

Shadow woke him from his unwanted reverie. "Hurry up, Knuckles! Get me loose!"

On the other side of the pit Sonic was fuming. That thing. It was responsible for all this mess. It was that oversized rabbit that stole his property. Innumerable death-threats circling his angry brain he brandished his weapon in challenge. Not wasting a moment he sped towards the demonic stuffy, intent on ending its miserly existence.

"FOOL!" roared the demon, shaking the town with the magnitude of its voice. The congealed jelly rose from the cobbled stone, perfect spheres floating in space.

The hedgehog instantly halted his advance, watching carefully as the globs orbited slowly about their creator in no particular order, shielding the beast. A raised ornamental statue of sorts got in the way of one of the floating globs. The sphere of jelly swallowed it whole, melting whatever was left to a pudding of steaming mulch.

"YOU WILL ALL SERVE ME IN YOUR DEATH!"

Sonic's resolve was perked at this line. Heck, he'd see Hell freeze over before he'd let himself be ordered around by such a disgusting example of multi-cellular life.

Back on the alter Knuckles had finally freed his landlord's twin, though they were now trapped where they stood, as the deadly globs of ooze had surrounded their only exit.

Lord Buhni continued to stomp its way towards the blue hedgehog, exposing its nightmarish teeth with a savage grin, eyes wide in madness.

Thinking quickly Sonic made a hasty retreat, running along the rim of the pit to reach his brother and his colleague. Gripping the Scythe carefully in one hand as he ran, he grasped the worming staff he had been keeping about his arm since he had left his basement, letting it unravel and straighten in his hold. Taking a deep breath he calculated and threw the staff of ore through the air, sending it spinning towards his sibling.

Shadow reached out and caught the staff easily. "Thank-you, sibling!" he called out mockingly as the other ran cursing about the rim of the pit, now trying to dodge the globs that had cornered him.

"Get your butt down here!" ordered Sonic obscenely as he ran, narrowly avoiding a rather aggressive glob of demon ooze. He continued to mutter curses and swears of every stripe and colour as he bobbed and weaved through the now nearly impregnable mass of orange and red spheres. Lord Buhni was hot on his trail, stomping after him with a vengeance.

Shadow spun the fighting staff in his hold expertly, turning to the echidna he said, "I would advise that you stay here and look after that book. Sonic keeps to his death-threats." With the redhead looking stunned at the remark, the dark hedgehog leapt from the alter, sailing impossibly far to land on the opposite side of the hellish pit. Speeding off, he made a bee-line for the angry form of his brother, who was dashing in all directions in attempts to preserve his life.

Catching up to Lord Buhni from behind, Shadow performed yet another gravity-defying leap. He sailed over the demon's head in a tight arch, bringing his ore-wrought staff to bear as he reached the front of the beast's cranium. With a cry he cracked the staff soundly between the demon bunny's eyes, causing the front of the skull to buckle inwards with the force of the blow with a sickening crunch. Lord Buhni stumbled in its chase, nearly falling back. Shadow continued to soar over the ground.

Sonic rolled his eyes in an unimpressed manner as his sibling landed beside him in stride. "Show off," he commented darkly.

"Hypocrite," retorted Shadow.

Sonic didn't have time to retaliate as a menacing blob of demon ooze came barrelling their way.

Lord Buhni shook its face, forcing whatever bones it possessed to snap back into place with a gross cracking noise. "FOOLS!" it said again. It had had enough. It had dragged the darker of the little rodents down here for the sole purpose of devouring it. At some point during its trek back to its pit of a home it had lost the creature. The demon was later surprised to find the same being having been offered up to it as a sacrifice by these ignorant under-dwellers. What should have been a tasty snack had turned into a rather painful morning experience. It was angry, and was through with fooling around with its prey. "YOU WILL ALL DIE BY MY HAND!" As if to prove the creature's point, the assembled globs of deadly ooze converged upon the twins with binding speed, instantly enveloping the both of them in an ever-growing sphere of corrosive death.

* * *

**Oh no! TBC!**


	14. Poor bunny

**DISCLAIMERS: Sonic and his peevish friends belong to the Sonic Team and Yuji Naka.**

**BUT: The mutiple reality continuums and everything else is mine.**

* * *

CHAPTER 14: POOR BUNNY

Knuckles blinked. No. It couldn't be. The brothers couldn't be… dead. It had always seemed just so ludicrous to him, that they could die. The twins were practically impervious to the very notion of death. But the evidence was right before his very eyes. There was no way they could have survived.

Lord Buhni was laughing in its triumph like a maniac, its voice shaking the very foundations of the entire settlement. The army of deadly blobs had congealed into one huge sphere, floating still over the square.

The giant demon stuffy's laughs came to an abrupt halt when its orb of doom suddenly blew into countless steaming droplets, the ooze evaporating harmlessly into the air.

"Well, that wasn't very nice," commented Shadow, brushing himself off as he floated to the ground gently.

"Stuff it. Let's just get this over with," retorted his sibling heatedly, who was also floating to the cobbled earth in an easy flow.

The echidna nearly lost his jaw with surprise. Lord Buhni gawped in silence, rather confused. How? They were mere mortals! How could they still be alive?

While everyone else was trying to figure out the improbable explanation of how the maniacal twins had managed to keep their sorry souls, said twins were having a debate of their own. "How do you propose we take care of this pest, dear sibling?" questioned the dark hedgehog sweetly, leaning on his staff.

"I don't care as long as it's painful," replied Sonic in a matter-of-fact way. "I want that thing to suffer. It stole my books!"

"Yes, yes, of course. As a side note, I believe you owe me an apology."

"What? What the hell for?"

"For falsely accusing me of snatching your library."

"Come off it! If I owe _you_ an apology, then you owe _me_ one!"

"Wha? I do not!"

"Oh, yes! You blaming me for painting your bed in ooze! I'd say you now realise the truth behind that event!"

As the two continued to bicker like children, Lord Buhni came to its senses. The ooze may not have killed them, but even a cockroach couldn't withstand the power of a good flattening. With that thought, the demon raised its left, still fuzzy foot high, intent on fulfilling that ideal. A wide grin played over its demented features as the foot came crashing down.

The red echidna cringed as the tremors from the blow reached the alter, sending unhealthy vibes coursing through his body.

Considering what he had just witnessed, Knuckles wasn't too surprised to see the monster foot dredge up from the cobbled earth under no force of its own, a yellow fountain of sparks pushing the limb back upwards. Standing in the precise middle of the sizable print made from the killer stomp were the two hedgehogs, pointing to the foot, looking rather peeved. The geyser of light continued to erupt from the twins' outstretched digits, forcing the foot farther and farther back.

The demon stuffy tried to keep its balance, the ethereal fountain upsetting its equilibrium. Lord Buhni began to wave its mismatched limbs in feeble attempts at remaining upright. Not far behind it laid the blaring pit, the red light reduced to an unhealthy glow from its unseen depths.

Tiring of the game, the brothers pulled their fingers back, thrusting their hands back out again forcefully with their palms out. The resulting blast of otherworldly energy hammered into the giant pink bunny, toppling it. With a defiant shriek the demon fell backwards, its massive form disappearing into the red glare of the supernatural pit.

The brothers ambled up to the pit's edge as the cry died away, looking over into the remains of the bloody light. The two of them remained there for a few seconds before turning away in disinterest.

Keeping a wary eye on the now-silent pit, Knuckles came rushing from the alter, still gripping both the book and the Flails. "You're alive!" he said incredulously as he reached the two hedgehogs.

"Oh yes, I'd say so," said Shadow cheerfully.

Sonic said nothing, snatching his book back into his possession.

"But how?" continued Knuckles.

"How what?" questioned Shadow.

"How are you still alive? That thing squashed you!"

"Yes, it most certainly did," agreed the black and red rodent. "Worked all those kinks out of my back, there. How about you sibling?" he asked, flexing his shoulders to emphasize his point.

Sonic cracked his neck twice. "Feh. I've been through worse," he commented simply, caressing his book unconsciously.

"Well, I guess we should go home, then?"

"Not without my books!" reminded Sonic loudly.

"No need to shout," admonished his brother.

Knuckles sighed quietly.

"We can get your books back once we get back home."

"Oh no don't! You're trying to pull a fast one on me!" accused the blue rodent.

Shadow rolled his eyes. "I can assure you I'm not, brother. I just want to get back to my knitting."

Sonic made a face, but gave in. "Fine, but no knitting until every last one is back on my shelf!"

"Alright! But let's just go!"

Knuckles' stomach was already beginning to do summersaults. He prayed they'd be taking a gondola car back up. Just… not one of those tunnels… The poor echidna's prayers were promptly dashed to pieces as the two temperamental mammals each took a hold of his arms. Just like lunch-time the day before, a pit of white light opened beneath their feet, plunging them into a nameless void. The redhead didn't bother to scream, as all three ended up at their front doorstep in a matter of seconds.

Feeling ill, the echidna made his way to the front door behind his landlord and his sibling in a not-so straight line.

Wiping their shoes off on the indoor mat the brothers entered the kitchen wordlessly. The television was still blasting from the living room, Tails still firmly plastered before its electric goodness. "Hm? What's this?" questioned Shadow. The receiver of the brother's phone laid on the counter off its cradle. "Tails, why is the phone on the counter?"

"Phone for you!" the fox replied.

"Squawk!" added Polly.

Not quiet sure as to how long the receiver had been sitting like that, Shadow lifted the phone to his ear hesitantly. "Hello?"

"About time!" shouted an obnoxious voice from the other end. The hedgehog shuddered. It was Eebon. "Where the hell have you been? I've been waiting for over twenty minutes!"

Shadow didn't immediately reply, the logic of why the feline would wait on the line for so long escaping him completely.

"I want you both at the Studio in a half hour!" ordered the director, hanging up indignantly afterwards.

Shadow sighed and replaced the receiver in its proper place.

"What's the matter?" interrogated Sonic from the base of the stairs.

"It seems as though we're not off the hook yet. That was our loving game director on the phone just know."

"Oh?"

"He wants us to be at the Studio in thirty minutes."

"Screw that!" shouted Sonic. "I've had enough of that aggravating feline! I'll skewer him! One of these days…" he continued to mutter unpleasant things as he stormed towards his chambers, all three weapons in hand. "Get your useless behind up here!" he called from the top of the stairs to Shadow.

Sighing again, the dark hedgehog complied, trudging up the stairs to where his angry brother waited.

Standing at the base of the staircase Knuckles watched the two of them vanish into Shadow's bedroom.

Strange murmurings could be heard from above. The chanting stopped momentarily, replaced by an awkward squawk of surprise as a thundering geyser of leather-bound tomes rocketed from out of the second hedgehog's room, flooding the hallway.

Sonic poked his head out from beneath the accumulated mess. He instantly spread himself over the mounds, grinning wildly. "Ooh, my precious, precious books…" he cooed.

"Look what you did!" shouted Shadow from somewhere inside his chambers.

Sonic scowled at him from atop his treasured possessions. "Look what I did what?" he demanded.

Shaking his head, Knuckles retreated into the living room. He plopped himself onto the couch, attempting to stare at the television as well as he could around Tails' obstructing cranium. He blocked out the brother's mounting argument emanating from the upstairs.

Eventually the brothers seemed to settle down, stomping back downstairs rather unhappily. A glance at the clock quickly put the both of them into an even more sour mood than before, as they now had only fifteen minutes to high-tail it to the vault-like Studio. "Alright, get up! The lot of you!" ordered Sonic angrily, turning off the television with a click of the remote.

"Awww! I was watching that!" complained Tails loudly.

"Shut it and move! We're late!"

The brothers herded everyone to the door, save Polly Perkins, who following of his own free will. After several failed attempts to tell the bird off, Shadow let the green plumaged creature accompany them on their trek.

The quintet rushed from their abode to make it to the great building on time, making hasty crossings at crosswalks and making rude gestures at peeved automobile drivers. They were but a few steps from the Studio doors when a high squeal assaulted their hearing.

"Soooooonniiiiiiiiccc!"

Sonic spun around angrily. Shadow groaned loudly, instantly recognising the shrill voice.

A purple swallow dressed in 1970's hippy attire bounded up to meet them.

Sonic nudged his brother. "Who the heck is that?"

"Ah… one of your new co-stars, sibling. Her name is Wave, or something like that," replied Shadow with a cheeky grin.

The blue hedgehog narrowed his gaze. "Just what _were_ you doing with that false skin of mine?" he questioned suspiciously.

Shadow gawped.

Wave came running up to them. "Sonic, I-" she stopped short, her glittering gaze magnetically pulled to the feathered form of Polly Perkins. "Wwoooww…" she breathed in awe. "You're so handsome…"

The two hedgehogs looked at the oblivious bird in puzzlement, then back at the swallow girl. Then once again back at Polly.

Wave sauntered up to the mutated pet dreamily. "What's your name?" she asked silkily, eyes sparkling as if she had found a new and very shiny toy.

Tails looked upwards, spying a plane high overhead. "Jet…" he said to himself, pointing to the sky.

"Jet? Is that your name?" asked Wave.

"Jet!" copied Polly Perkins.

"Ooh… My name is Wave," said the swallow, looking coy. "I like you." She instantly took the green bird by the arm and lead him into the Studio, completely forgetting the existence of the other four animals.

The brothers were silent a moment, watching the two birds vanish down the hallway behind the glass doors.

"Well, I believe that takes care of our bird problem," stated Sonic in a satisfied manner.

"What do you mean?" questioned Shadow.

"Polly doesn't know that way home, now, does he?" he replied with a toothy grin.

The dark hedgehog grinned back, getting the idea. "I hope Wave and 'Jet' will be very happy together," he said as he and his brother filed into the Studio.

"Ha! They should hope!" laughed the other.

Tails ran in afterwards, squealing in delight.

Knuckles just shook his head and followed after them.

-. Fin .-

* * *

**Hopefully this ending doesn't seem too corny. I had to wrap it up somehow, or it would just keep going, and going, and going... you get the idea.**

**Thank-you for reading! I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I did writing it! A great big thanks to -skittles the sugar fairy-, -Mecha Scorpion-, -Mrs. Queen Tiger-, and-Ceil the Hedgehog-,for all of your reviews! I'm taking a breather for now, but not to worry! The Maniacal Twins will be back in action soon enough with 'House', which will be put up along-side 'The Founder'. Once I have a good chunk of both of them written, I will begin to post them. Even if I have presumably fallen off the face of the earth I'll be sure to at least update my main page, so visit me there, too!**


End file.
